WICKED SMART . . . PLAYFUL MINDS THINK A LIKE: HEAVY THINKING! LOVE, DATING AND MARRIAGE SMARTS! A FATEFUL SLAYING OF THE VERY WORST KIND, A REALLY SUPER PLAYER WITH GOOD COMPASSION! TO BREAK THE RULES, YOU MUST MASTER THEM. PARADIGM LOST . . . DARE GREATLY. FRESH LIFE CHURCH PASTOR, LEVI'S 7 GREAT EXPECTATIONS IN MARRIAGE THAT WILL NOT SUSTAIN A HEALTHY, THRIVING UNION: (1) CHEMISTRY & ATTRACTION--MOST MARRIAGES, LOSE THAT HOT PASSION WITHIN THE FIRST YEAR--SORRY! (2) JUST COMMON INTERESTS, LIKE BOTH WEARING MATCHING SEAHAWKS FOOTBALL JERSEYS, AND WATCHING GAMES TOGETHER . . . WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU WANT TO TAKE THE KIDS TO CHURCH, WHICH NEVER, OR GENERALLY NEVER HURTS KIDS, AND HE WANTS TO STAY HOME AND WATCH FOOTBALL! SORRY! (3) EXPECTING THE OTHER PERSON TO GIVE MORE IN THE RELATIONSHIP, THAN YOU ARE WILLING TO GIVE! IF YOU GAVE THE SAME AMOUNT OF ENERGY INTO YOUR JOB, WOULD YOUR BOSS KEEP YOU? PROBABLY NOT! (4) GREAT EXPECTATIONS THAT LOOKS, SEX, HEALTH, HAIR--AS IN GOING BALD, BODIES AND LOVE WILL STAY THE SAME THROUGHOUT YOUR MARRIED LIFE . . . AH, GET REAL! LOL! (5) EXPECTING TO KEEP THE SAME LIFESTYLE YOU HAD AS A SINGLE PERSON--SLOB LIKE BEHAVIORS? SELFISHNESS? PERSONAL SPACE AND TIME? MARRIAGE IS LIKE HAVING A SURVEILLANCE CAMERA ON YOU FOR EACH PERSON YOU ADD TO YOUR FAMILY . . . I'LL BE WATCHING YOU! MARRIAGE IS MORE ABOUT PERSONAL PERFECTION, THROUGH THE YES OF ANOTHER PERSON, THAN IT IS ABOUT THE COUPLE! MIRRORS OF BAD HABITS! LOL! KIDS, ONLY MAKE YOUR WEAKNESSES WORSE, NOT BETTER! (6) EXPECTING MINOR INDISCRETIONS AND CHEATING THAT TAKE FROM THE BIGGER PICTURE AND EFFORTS OF MARRIAGE AND FAMILY LIFE, TO DO ANYTHING LESS THAN REDUCE YOU TO TOTAL SHIT! BOTH SEXES! ONE NIGHT WITH A PROSTITUTE CAN RUIN YOUR LIFE! THINK! MARRIAGE IS A BUSINESS DEAL, WITH FRINGE BENEFITS, AND LONG TERM SATISFACTION! NOT CHEAP THRILLS AND SEX! THINK, LONG TERM . . . THE CHOICES YOU MAKE TODAY, WILL EFFECT WHERE YOU END UP TOMORROW--THINK LONG RANGE GOALS! MARRIAGE PLACES SEXUAL LIMITS . . . WHICH IF UNCHECKED, ENDS UP WITH BEASTIALITY, SERIAL KILLERS, CHILD SEXUAL ABUSE, AFFAIRS--CONTROL! DISCIPLINE, ROOT WORD OF DISCIPLESHIP! THE MARRIAGE BED IS UNDEFILED--PLAY! LOL! AND (7) EXPECTATIONS THAT RELIGION WILL CURE YOUR MARITAL ILLS . . . IT WON'T! JESUS-JOY MAY, BUT NOT BURYING YOUR HEAD IN A CHURCH, CHURCH SERVICE, OR FAMILY AVOIDANCE IN LIEU OF FAMILY RESPONSIBILITIES! GREAT SERMON, WORTH, GETTING THE DETAILS ONLINE! BUILD YOUR RELATIONSHIPS ON A SURE FOUNDATIONS, LIKE LOVE! IF YOU CAN FALL OUT OF LOVE, YOU CAN GROW BACK IN LOVE! ASKING YOURSELF, WILL THIS BUILD LOVE AND TRUST, OR WILL MY ACTIONS DESTROY IT? I CAN ONLY SPEAK FOR MOST FEMALES . . . I JUST WANT SOMEONE WHO LOVES ME, ACCEPTS ME FOR WHO I AM! THAT'S THE ONLY WAY TO GO, FIGHTING THE GOOD FIGHT, UNTIL THE GOOD LORD COMES AGAIN . . . THAT'S SOME KIND OF "AMEN!" (COUNTRY SONG) BLOOD SINS (ISIS) . . . GERMANY WELCOMES REFUGEES, HOLDING CHILDREN ON THE SHOULDERS OF FAMED SOCCER PLAYERS . . . LOVE YOUR GOD, LOVE YOUR FELLOW MEN, WOMEN AND CHILDREN . . . 40,000 WELCOMED, BUT 800,000 NEED PLACEMENT AND A NEW NATIONS! GERMANS ARE STOUT, AND I AM SHOCKED THAT HITLER, WITH SOME HELP FROM ITALY AND JAPAN, TRIED TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD . . . THAT SAME TENACIOUS SPIRIT, IS IN THE GERMAN DNA, TAKING ON HUGE ASS TASKS . . . BUT, THIS SMALL, BUT POWERFUL COUNTRY, CAN'T HANDLE THIS PROBLEM ALONE! THIS IS A WORLD CRISIS, AND A WORLD OPPORTUNITY TO MAKE A LASTING PEACE FOR THESE PEOPLE! BRITAIN, YOU HAVE CANADA AND AUSTRALIA TO HELP! U.S.A., GOING FROM 1500 LEGAL EMIGRANTS TO 10,000, NICE CHANGE, BUT DOESN'T CUT THE MUSTARD FOR A WORLD CRISIS, NOR PUT OUR MOUTHS AND MONEY WHERE WE NEED TO BE, FOR CHRISTIANS GETTING THEIR HEADS CUT OFF, TORTURED, MAIMED, AND STARVING! MAYBE THIS IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN MALE AND FEMALE WORLD LEADERS . . . CHANCELLOR, ANGELA MERKEL IS DOING HER FAIR SHARE OR MORE . . . RISE TO THE CHALLENGE! PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATE, HILLARY CLINTON, FORMER SECRETARY OF STATE . . . IT IS THE RIGHT THING TO DO, THE HUMANITARIAN THING TO DO! AMERICA, THE MELTING POT, HAS ONLY BEEN STRENGTHENED BY A HISTORY OF THE MANTRA, OF BRINGING YOUR POOR, YOUR TIRED, AND GIVING PEOPLE THE CHANCE FOR A NEW START, IN A NEW COUNTRY, WITH THE POSSIBILITY OF THE "AMERICAN DREAM" . . . FIGHT THE GOOD FIGHT, TIL THE GOOD LORD COMES AGAIN! THAT IS SOME TYPE OF AMEN! HAPPINESS IS FIGHTING FOR A WORTHY CAUSE . . . LOVE FOR THE SYRIAN PEOPLE, QUALIFIES! FUCK ISIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DEFEAT THEM, BY TAKING ALL THEIR CITIZENS! LOL! THE GREAT CALAPHATE, WILL HAVE NOBODY TO PUSH AROUND, BEHEAD, AND MURDER . . . ISIS BETTER HOPE TO GOD, THAT THERE IS A SAVIOR! YOU ARE GOING TO NEED ONE! JESUS JOY! HE IS THE HOPE OF THE WORLD! LET'S NATION UP! MAKE PEACE HAPPEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WE CAN DO THIS WORLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Don't Hate Me. Hate MY Game!

What one has not experienced, one will never understand in print.  Isadora Duncan (1877-1927)

They say, those who can't do, teach . . . so here we go!  Just consider the source . . . 4 marriages, but for strange reasons, under very different circumstances, but, no excuses!  LOL!  Now, yesterday in church, Pastor Levi, sermon, online, started with a situation in the New Testament, when the Pharisees and the Sadducee's, the disciples of Christ, and the followers of John the Baptist, were standing around, basically arguing, about how many converts they were getting, and debating various types of doctrinal questions, and Jesus, just turned and walked away . . . he said he had to go to Samaria.  Jesus comes to a woman, who is drawing water from a well, and tells her to go get her husband, for he has the living water, he wants to share with her and her man.  She tells Jesus that she has no husband, and he can see through her avoidance of the issue, and said, that is because you have had 5 husbands, and the man you are living with now, it not your husband!  She admits, that he must be someone with spiritual powers, to know her life situation, and then she tried to change the subject.  Later, she goes into the city, tells the people of this teacher, this prophet, this seer.  Having had 4 husbands, I can relate to the woman at the well!  LOL!

But, there are lessons to learn from this story . . . the living water of Jesus Christ, can heal, make new, change, bring love, cause a new heart, in people . . . he never gives up on us!  God, loves happy endings . . . and you can't judge a man or woman, happy or sad, until the day they die!

My motives for getting married, in the past, where less than noble, other than, perhaps, the first time, married according to the dictates of a dream, which was really the best man, for the job at the time!  LOL!  I was young, immature, judgmental, critical, thoughtless, and any other man, would have dumped my ass, years, before, I dumped his!  LOL!  I was probably smarter, at 19, than I have been in the decades since then! LOL!  But, the world has benefited from my marriage, life, experiences, insights, children, and that is yet to be brought into full fruition . . . the DNA, contributions of both spouses, combination of personalities, strengths and weaknesses, have blended to make, very balanced and wonderful children, who are just coming into their own; therefore, were my decisions a mistake, or just part of the plan?  Only time and God, can tell that, and he never, never, never, gives up on us.  I like to think, we fuck up our lives, and he fixes it, then we fuck it up again, and he fixes it again, and that process goes on until we die.  Now, that same principle, can work within the confines, protections, and benefits of marriage also, I just have not chosen the route much . . . about every 5 years or so, I get, what I sometimes look at, as weak, and think I need a man to get old with, but I keep feeling younger, so, catch and release, seems to be my phishing expeditions for men . . . and frankly, girls, I am getting better looking men, now, than I ever did in my younger, hotter years . . . but, I have a better personality, and I am more fun, and I think, it has, literally taken, me, many men, and many years, to understand, marriage, men, women, what makes us tick, and what works, or at least what doesn't work!  LOL!  See, now someone who hasn't had this much experience, could not teach you like this!

There is hope for me, my grandmother, who was married to the same man, for about 40 to 50 years, and, yes, it was much like a business, separate beds, but with two successful careers, and 4 wonderful children, a great life, respected, and admired by many, my grandmother, finally, got the man of her dreams, or a lover at age 78.  She stuck out the first marriage, not knowing better, or at least being smart enough to see that this union, was, while not always fulfilling personally, maybe sexually, was stable, good, kind, and secure, which is saying a lot, but at 78, grandmother remarried after about 15 years of living without a spouse . . . that is what having a life will do for you women, one separate and aside, meaningful, and cool, on her own, but she ran into a man, who had been looking for her for 8 years, since his wife died and he heard that her husband, was also deceased, having dated once in college, and lost touch of each other, they finally ran into each other.  Sometimes, who we marry for the business side of a marriage, is not, necessarily who we are most fulfilled by, and my aunt and uncles, father, and the children of the first marriage, were pissed, when grandmother read love poems at this new partner, of 6 wonderful years together, at his funeral.  My father and his siblings, were mad that grandmother didn't read love poems to their father!  He didn't make her feel the same way . . . grandpa sat in his arm chair, watching football, the news and reading the newspaper, while grandmother taught college, was dean of women, developed her skills as an artist, musician, poet, singer, actress, tater, and traveled the world!  Leo adored grandma, and my grandpa, had a good life with her!

The Best is Yet to Come . . . God is NOT Finished with Me!

I am a tough case, and he probably, knew, that I was going to be a pain in the ass, not only to him, but to men in general, especially, men who want to control me, either through marriage, power, abuse, sex, threats, doubles, stripping me of all earthly goods, property, and evidence of previous lives!  LOL!  The scriptures say, the Lord, chastises those he loves . . . well, he must love me a shit load, because, this is beyond ridiculous!  LOL!  I will make you humble . . . good luck!  I am glad, however, that I read the scriptures, when I was young, because, I have sure needed to rely on them and they have served as a source, if not of comfort, of thought and contemplation . . . and that, for some reason, I find solace in!  But, I believe, that marriage is not about the other partner in the marriage, but about your own perfection, and this other person in just a mirror of who we are at the time, we attract at particular person to us . . . and that is a scary thought!  LOL!  Interpol, CIA, FBI, assassins, bounty hunters . . . very interesting, but that seems to be my world!  Could it be my politics, or my charming personality?  It is interesting, if nothing else, and maybe when I am ready to give up the fire in my belly for politics, I will attract a different type of man, not an enemy in sheep's clothing!  LOL!  But, it is my game, and I am going to PLAY IT!  LOL!

God, gives us many opportunities, to get a mirror of ourselves, to work on that, personal perfection . . . and it is not always a pretty face, looking back at us!  And, I am more than just another pretty face!  LOL!  As, my temporary landlord, Sam, has found out . . . yesterday, we worked our way out of the honeymoon period, and I am speaking figuratively, I pay $10 a night to recliner surf, on Sam's chair, while I decide, which man is my next, wiling victim!  LOL, offered on the sacrifice alter of either a relationship, or if he is game, even to exploring what fucked up, sides of ourselves we need to work on next . . . some people get it right the first time and work things out with one partner, but I am a complex human being, and a difficult woman to deal with, to say the least, and gamier than hell, big game trophy, with attitude; therefore, the hunter or the hunted, better have his shit together, be man enough to deal with me, smart enough to deal with me and be able to ride the bitch the full 8 seconds, or don't get on!  My last husband, Frank, aka, Allan Rex Bess, better known as AB or Absolute Bastard . . . faked his own suicide to get out of the marriage, I tried to annul, two months after this fateful marriage, most likely between equals, but total warriors, with different agendas, political outcomes in mind, and whatever differences!  Someone asked me if I loved him, and the answer, still it, YES!  LOL!  But we could not stand each other!  LOL!

I still love all my abusive, government, FBI Dating Game line-ups . . . I just can't live with them, and they want to kill me, for leaving their sorry assed egos!  LOL!  Men who have slept with over 800 women, do not dig being left, by the one who got away, especially, when their offering of love, was merely to get you under their THUMB!  It used to be okay, back in the Victorian era, which someone accused me of still being a part of, seeing my modesty and puritan thoughts, at least sometimes . . . hey, I am a woman, and i reserve the right to change my mind, my mood, and my morals at any given time, depending on how I feel tat that time!  You say, morals are not relative . . . you are not a woman!  LOL!  Song lyrics, I am riding that fast train down . . . probably!  LOL!  I am fascinated by psychology, so this if fun for me, not necessarily for the martyr partner, who must be into sadomasicism!  Or self hatred for tangling with me!  LOL!  Like I said, any guy who is game is in for the ride of his life!  Rachel may be younger, prettier, but she is much tamer . . . I am gamy as any wild animal, feral status for sure, so hang onto your hat cowboys!  LOL! FREE RIDERS . . . OH, YEAH!

Not Recommended for Amateurs . . . I Would, Haven't, But Would If I Thought Necessary, Repent for Fornication, but Not for Sleeping with My Black Lovers!  That is Another Aspect of My Punishment!  LOL!  No Respecter of Persons!  Men, Lovers!  All Sizes, Shapes and Colors!  LOL!

So, yesterday, and my poor, up tight, bigoted father, in the old fashioned, not Christ-like, Mormon Church . . . could not handle me experiencing chocolate, without, nuts, my coffee, black without cream or sugar, straight, hard core, hot black, lovers!  There is this racist father, who got on YouTube, and warned the new Black Panthers, Black Lives Matter, and Black people, in Texas, told the cops to stand aside, and he, and his fellow, KKK, white supremacists, armed with sling-shots, were coming after black activists, and they are going to run them out of town!  LOL!  Well, some black activists, and a guy not much smaller than this white cracker, ass prejudice asshole, much like my father, cowboy hat, on, was confronted by a particular, man, who looked like a ZZ Tops, sharp dressed man, that women dig, and stood up to this bully, and brought up the fact that he own daughter was dating a black, or had been and that he was furious about that fact, and that white men had long been jealous of black penis power . . . those Mandingo's!  Super stud black slaves, that were used for breeding!  I loved it, this guy didn't know what to say, he just stood there tongue tied!  I thought of my own dear old pop, and he would have mouthed off just like that, hell he can't handle President Obama, being so successful, even with the Republican controlled Congress!  Smart is smart, and I don't do dumb!

I don't know if Miles and Howard, are typical, of eastern boys, but, women of letters, have a hard time finding men of pedigree, education, and politics, in the west, it is the eastern educational snobbery or something. but I haven't met a white guy with an I.Q. of 168, nor with a father that worked for the U.S. Department of Transportation in Washington, D.C., and who was cooler than hell, loved my ass, and didn't want me to change one thing . . . or should I take the white red-neck, totally crude, rude, and prejudice, who can't know what going to law school is like, nor do they appreciate and woman with an advanced degree, and they just want this brassy bitch to shut the hell up, and we will shoot your ass, if you don't!  LOL!  Or how about Howard who was more like a husband to me, that any other man, protective, fun to go to McDonald's with, while he and I, put on our spectacles to read the morning newspaper, he focusing on the sports, me, on politics, saying if we ever got together, that he would have to get up early in the morning and purview the morning newspaper, cutting out the controversial topics and articles . . . he would say, too early Honey, and I responded by telling him that I was going to do likewise for him, and if the Yankees lost to the Red Sox or the Cubs, I would cut that article out of the newspaper before it ruined his day!  LOL!  Now, both, Miles and Howard, who's father wanted to be an FBI agent, but due to prejudice, settled for being in the leadership of Rutgers University, and his grandfather a doctors, all came from New Jersey!  But, Howard, was fun, cool, we agreed politically, but for guns, and we loved the outdoors!  I will love both of these men til the day I die, for exposing me to another aspect of life, or living, the black reality, black love and black sex . . . if it ain't easy, it ain't worth taking . . . song lyrics!  This blog is not going where I want it to go, but I am going to lunch, Sam is waiting in the car!

GAMES, GAMES, GAMES . . . GOTTA LOVE'EM!

IF YOU GOT A GOOD THING, IT BEST BE SHAKEN!

GOTTA LOVE, LOVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  LOL!