SWEAT CYCLE. SHAKE THINGS UP! ADAM & EVE. FORBIDDEN FRUIT. "SHIVER" AT THE UNION. TOGETHER, WE COULD . . . . TOP GUN. PHANTOM. YOU'RE ARE EVERYWHERE, BUT YOU ARE HARD TO FIND. LONGHORN. ENCHANTED. BETTER TOGETHER. GENUINE PATRIOTS WITH BENEFITS. RUFUS. DIVERGENT. INSURGENT. ALLEGIANT. TWIN SPIN. ALLSTEAL. YOU BETTER PUT YOUR KINGDOM UP FOR SALE . . . DID SHE MAKE YOU BREAK DOWN, MAKE YOU CRY, MAKE YOU BREAK DOWN? --STEVIE NICKS. LIFE'S BETTER SIDE BY SIDE. BETTER KEEP THEM SEPARATED! SPOOKS ON THE LEFT OF ME, GHOSTS ON THE RIGHT, AND HERE I AM, RIGHT HERE IN THE MIDDLE WITH YOU! FREAL. REAL MILKSHAKES, REAL EASY! WHAT IS THE DIFFERNCE BETWEEN THE CIA AND THE MOB? GOD DAMNED NOTHING! YOUNG MR. TOP GUN AND HIS TWO OLDER, MORE EXPERIENCED, AGENT ASSETS, TRIED TO DO A STINK OP ON ME AT THE MALL, YESTERDAY. PIG TAILS: (1) TOP GUN COMES OVER AND SITS BY ME, ONE THE FEW OF ABOUT 5 OR MORE PEOPLE WAITING FOR THE BUS; (2) I HAD MY EARBUDS IN ROCKING TO MY MUSIC, 100.1, CLASSIC ROCK, SO, WHY ME? EXCUSE ME. WHAT? ANNOYED I TAKE MY EARBUDS OUT. DO I TAKE BUS #1 INBOUND OR #2 OUTBOUND. THAT DEPENDS ON WHERE YOU ARE GOING. IF YOUR OVER BY THE UNIVERSITY, THEN TAKE BUS #1 INBOUND, IF YOU ARE OVER BY TARGET, TAKE BUS #2 . . . I AM OVER BY THE UNIVERSITY. TAKE #1 AND STAY ON THIS SIDE; (3) I NOTICE TWO RATHER DISTINGUISED LOOKING GENTLEMEN, CAUSALLY DRESSES, ON WITH A LIGHT BLUE T-SHIRT, THAT SAID, "BEST" IN A CIRCLE . . . FEDS! CODING. THE OTHER HAD A BLACK T-SHIRT AND BALL CAP, SUNGLASSES, BUT SALT AND PEPPER HAIR, TAN SHORTS, BUT, SOOO NOT THE TYPE TO RIDE THE BUS! WHAT DOESN'T FIT IN ALL THESE PEOPLE? ALWAYS LOOK FOR WHAT SEEMS OUT OF PLACE OR ABNORNAL. THEY SHOULD KNOW THIS BY NOW! FUCK, WHO IS TRAINING THESE GOONS? SHELLEY? SHE IS NOT BEING CHASED AND HARASSED FOR THE LAST 7 YEARS. I AM THE PRO AT YOUR OWN GAME! (4) BUS #1 INBOUND ARRIVES, AND I TELL MR, YOUNG GUNS, TO JUMP ON THE BUS, THIS IS THE ONE YOU WANT TO TAKE. ALL THE SUDDEN THE TWO DUDES FROM ACROSS THE STREET AT THE OTHER BUS STOP AT THE SOUTHGATE MALL, SCURRY OVER AND JUMP ON OUR BUS! TAG TEAM COPS! SHELLEY'S ROBO COPS, RETIRED AND PAID UNDER THE TABLE? LIKELY. (5) RATHER SHOCKED THAT THE TWO OLDER GUYS WHO LOOKED MORE LIKE THEY BELONGED ON THE GOLF COURSE, THAN ON THE BUS, GOT ON AND WENT TO THE BACK OF THE BUS. SHIT! THEY ARE TAILING ME! WHO KNOWS WHAT THE PLAN IS? (6) THINK QUICK, I LEAN OVER TO THE YOUNG COLLAGE STUDENT, MR. TOP GUN, AND, TELL HIM THAT THERE ARE THREE UNIVERSITY STOPS, ACTUALLY, THERE ARE FOUR, I BELIEVE ALONG AUTHOR STREET. WHERE DO YOU LIVE? IN THE DORMS? NO ACTUALLY OVER BY THE LIBRARY . . . OH, THAT IS WHERE I AM GOING! NO ANY HALF-WIT, WHO WATCHES MY DAILY SCHEDULE, WILL KNOW, THAT, I GENERALLY, GO DO MY BLOG IN THE MORNINGS OVER AT THE LAW SCHOOL, GO TO LUNCH AND, HIT THE COUNTY LIBRARY FOR NEWS AND TRUE CRIME OR ANY LASTEST AND GREATEST UPDATES TO MY BLOG, I FORGOT . . . SO, NOT A BIG SURPRISE THE LIBRARY WAS THE GOAL; (6) I WAS ON THE LAST SEAT, LOWER LEVEL, BEHIND THE DRIVER, AND THE TWO OLDER MEN, PROBABLY YOUNGER THAN I AM, WERE SEATED SOMEWHERE ON TOP, BUT A CHICK RATHER, BEEFY, SAT IN THE SEAT BETWEEN US, BLOCKING THE LOWER, LEVEL, AND MY ABILITY TO GRAB THE "STOP REQUESTED" CORD, WITHOUT THEM SEEING ME DO IT! I DIDN'T WARN THE THIRD DUDE INVOLVED, THE YOUNG GUY, WHO, MOST LIKELY WAS THE BAIT! NEW KID ON CAMPUS AND THE SPOOKS ALWAYS, MAKE THE INITIAL CONTACT, BECAUSE IF THEY WERE WAITING FOR ME TO GET OFF MY MUSIC OR EVEN WANT TO BE BOTHERED, GOOD LUCK! NOT HAPPENING DUDE! I HAD BEEN WANTING TO CHECK MY BACK ACCOUNT BALANCE, TO SEE IF I HAD, MORE MONEY THAN I THOUGHT, BECAUSE, I KEPT SLIDING, MCDONALD'S BREAKFASTS AND LUNCH IN ON MY CARD, JUST CRINGING TO SEE IF IT GOES THROUGH. SO, THERE IS "LIQUID PLANET" I SNEAK AN ARM UP, BEHIND SOME CHICK AND PULL THE CORD . . . MAKE A FAST BREAK OFF THE BUS! LOL. THE BUS PULLED A BIT FORWARD, AND STOPPED, AND I WAS LIKE OH, SHIT, THEY ARE FOLLOWING ME OR GETTING OFF, OR THE ALLEGED, COLLEGE KID, IS WONDERING, WHY I AM GETTING OFF SO SOON. I DIDN'T HANG OUT TO WATCH, I JUST BOLTED ACROSS THE STREET AND UP THE HANDICAPPED RAMP! FUCK, ATM OUT OF ORDER? I HAVE FUCKED, SHELLEY UP, PUT MY "ELECTRONIC FOOTPRINT" ON THE MAP FROM THIS LOCATION BEFORE . . . DID THEY PAY THEM TO LEAVE IT OUT OF BUSINESS OR ORDER? LIKELY. I HIT THE RESTROOMS . . . FUNNY POTTY SIGN, ON THE TWO UNISEX BATHROOMS, IN THE HIP COFFEE JOINT. THERE IS A MALE AND FEMALE IN THE TYPICAL BATHROOM ART, WITH A LINE BETWEEN THEM, BOTH, LOOKING LIKE THEY WERE IN DEEP THOUGHT AND BOTH FACING THE OPPOSITE WAY. OVER THEIR HEADS IT SAID, "THINKING" AND BETWEEN THEM "ROOM!" IN MY BLOG, I HAD, DISCUSSED, THE MARCO POLO MOTEL, AND THEIR AD FOR "NICE ROOM(S) IN AN ANALOGY TO THE DEEP DISH GALS WITH MORE SPACIOUS, VAGINAL CANALS! I TOLD YOU I COULD TAKE YOU DEEPER AS A TRAINER ON ANY SUBJECT! LOL. DO THE MATH. IF I HAVE HAD TWO ALMOST 10 POUND BABIES, THAT WERE CLOSE TO 21 INCHES LONG . . . IS THERE ANYONE I CAN'T HANDLE? LOL. ONCE YOU'VE BEEN THERE! SURE, YOUR BODY, GOES BACK TO NORMAL, BUT, IT HAS BEEN GIVEN NEW ELASTICITY! NOW THIS IS A BIT CRASS, BUT, NOT SURPRISING FROM THIS BAD ASS . . . WITH THE THOUGHT ON MY MIND, THE BUTT-HOLE SURFERS, AND HUMPING YOUR RADIO, I HAD, BUTT-HOLES AND SIZE, OR PENCIL DICKS ON MY MIND AND LOW AND BEHOLD, MY SHIT WAS ACTUALLY, GOLD, SKINNY, AND ABOUT 6 INCHES LONG . . . GROSS I KNOW, BUT, I BELIEVE, EVERYTHING IS SYMBOLIC, ONLY SKINNY DICKS CAN FIT IN ASSHOLES! LOL. JUST SAYING BOYZ, WHO WANT ANAL SEX, OR KIDS, YOU ARE MAKING A SAD STATEMENT ABOUT YOUR OWN, ANATOMY! SMALL GUYS SHOULD GO FOR SMALL GALS AND THE LARGER GUYS, LARGER GIRLS! NATURAL SELECTION. TIGHT ASSES, SEEM, TOTALLY, UNCOMFORTABLE FOR BOTH PARTIES, MALE ON MALE OR MALE ON FEMALE! THE BLISS OF NATURAL SELECTION! SIZE MATTERS! FILL UP THE PUMP FOR THE GALS TOO! I WANT TO KNOW I HAVE HAD SEX! EVERYTHING IS TO SCALE! (6) THE BUSES ON THIS ROUTE, NEAR THE COLLEGE COME EVERY 15 MINUTES, SO THIS WAS AN IN AND OUT STOP. I CROSSED THE STREET, AND, WHO COMES FOLLOWING ME OUT THE DOORS OF "LIQUID PLANET?" FUCKING SHELLEY, MY SISTER, AKA ME! I HAVE SEEN HER IN MONTANA, MISSOULA BEFORE, BUT, RIGHT ACROSS THE STREET? TWIN SPIN. WHAT THE FUCK? SHELLEY LIKELY HAD NEVER BEEN TO MONTANA, UNTIL I CAME! SAME WITH THE OTHERS, BUT FOR EACHEL, ON TRIP WITH MY DAD, TO RECOVER A TRUCK WHEN SHE PRETENDED SHE WAS A PI FOR A CASE IN BERYL, UTAH OR IRON COUNTY, WHERE SHE MET ALL THE COPS, ATTORNEYS, AND JUDGES, WHO LOVED THE NEW AND IMPROVED BOOB JOB, TUMMY TUCK, ASS SUCK AND, OTHER, IMPROVEMENTS, AS RACHEL SHOWED OFF HER NEW CLEAVAGE! LOL. SO, WHY THE FUCK IS SHELLEY HERE, OTHER THAN, I KNEW SHE WAS BEING ME AND SHE IS WHEREVER I AM, AT WHATEVER TIME, OR ELECTRONICALLY, SHE IS! HOW IS SHE GETTING HER MONEY? WHO DOES SHE WORK FOR? OR IS IT EXACTLY LIKE I SAY, MIX, MATCH AND ATTACH, SHE IS ME AND THE BLOGGER WITH BILLIONS OF READERS, BUT, I AM GETTING MORE AND MORE BLOCKED, CHOKED OUT BY THE DAY! IT TOOK ME 20 MINUTES TO GET ON MY OWN BLOG, BEING TAKEN OFF EVERY SITE! EVEN GOOGLE BLOGGER LOGIN WAS, DIFFICULT AND WHEN I GET IN, THE SITES ARE ALL FUCKED UP! HAD I NOT BEEN SO SHOCKED, TO SEE SHELLEY, IN ALL HER LIVING BREATHING, UGLY, SHIT, PATHETIC JEALOUS BITCH, I MIGHT HAVE RUN ACROSS THE STREET AND BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF HER, BUT SHE IS NOT WORTH GOING TO JAIL FOR! HER HAIR IS ABOUT THE LENGTH IT HAS BEEN ALL HER LIFE, BUT FOR A FEW TIMES, WHEN, SHE WAS TRYING TO BE THE ATTORNEY, EARLY ON IN THE TRUMP ADMINSTRATION DAYS, COPIED MY SHORTER HAIR DO, REMEMBER, RREADERS, THE BIG ASS, CAMERA, POINTED AT ME IN THE MISSOULA MALL, ACTUALLY, WITH A MAN, CLAIMING TO BE TAKING A PICTURE OF COMMERCAIL REAL ESTATE, WHEN, FROM THREE ANGLES, HE WAS TAKING MY PICTURE . . . FOR MY VERY STLYIN' HAIR DO! SOME CHICK IN TOOLE, UTAH CUT IT AND I LOVED IT, WOULD HAVE TRAVLED TO UTAH FOR HAIR CUTS BACK WHEN I HAD A VEHICLE, IN THE EARLY DAYS IN MONTANA! SO, SHOULER LENGTH, OR JUST BELOW IT, A BIT LIGHTER, BRUNNETTE, LOOKS MORE NATURAL, THAN THE JET BLACK SHIT SHE USED TO WEAR, ELVIRAH, OR MORTICIA OF THE ADAM'S FAMILY, LOOK! SUNGLASSES, PURPLE T-SHIRT WITH WHITE WRITING ON THE BACK, DARK GRAY OR BLACK PANTS, ABOUT THE WEIGHT SHE HAS BEEN BUT OLDER, SAGGIER, ABOUT WHAT, I THOUGHT, SHE DIDN'T LOOK BETTER OR WORSE, JUST SHELLEY! SHE WAS DRIVING A METALIC TEAL COLORED, TOYOTA SEDAN, FOUR DOOR, CAMERY? BUT WHAT SHOCKED ME AND, MIGHT BE PART OF THE RUSE TO APPEAR TO BE LOCAL, OR FROM MONTANA, HELENA TO BE EXACT, IS FROM WHAT I COULD SEE, SPORTING, CARROL COLLEGE, CATHOLIC, COLLEGE, ALUMNI PLATES? WHAT THE FUCK? WAS SHE BORROWING SOMEONE'S CAR? VERY NON-DESCRIPT, SOME CAR, YOU MIGHT WANT TO DISAPPEAR IN! FUNNY, LAST I TALKED TO MY OLDEST SON, CHRIS, AND MENTIONED THAT, IF HE WANTED, I WOULD BUY HIS CAR, OR I WAS LOOKING FOR A CAR . . . HE SUGGESTED A CAMERY! TOYOTA? THAT IS A SCHMIDT FAMILY CAR, STYLE, HATE THEM AND I TOLD HIM, I GOT A TOYOTA YARIS, AND IT STOPPED, WITHIN 24 HOURS, AFTER PURCHASE, THEN, ON 5 OR 6 OTHER OCCASIONS AND I TOLD THE DEALER, TO COME GET IT OR GIVE ME AND NEW CAR . . . I BOUGHT IT SPECIFICALLY, FOR THE BROCK SECURITY CASE, ALL $357.6 MILLION, KNOWING THAT I WOULD BE GOING BACK AND FORTH TO SALT LAKE AND FEDERAL COURT, DIDN'T WANT ANY SHIT OR BREAKDOWNS! IT BECAMSE THE TARGET CAR, FOR THE BROCK CASE STEAL! SO NO THANKS, AND, I HAVE ALWAYS, LOVED, MAZDAS, FOR THE STYLE, ECONOMY AND GAS MILEAGE, CAN'T BEAT IT, 36 IN THE CITY AND 42 ON THE HIGHWAY! THAT IS WHY CHRIS HAS A FUCKING MAZDA, BECAUSE I TOLD HIM TO GET ONE! BACK IN THE DAYS, WHEN, HE LISTENED! LOL. SO, THERE YOU HAVE IT, TWO, SISTERS, WHO ARE ALLEGEDLY, THE SAME PERSON, RIGHT ACROSS THE STREET FROM ONE ANOTHER, I EVEN, STOOD, OUTSIDE THE BUS SHELTER, BECAUSE IT WAS HOT! THERE HAS TO BE SECURITY CAMERAS, SOMEWHERE? I KNOW THERE IS ON THE BUS, AND SHELLEY, TOOK OFF ABOUT EXACTLY WHEN THE BUS ARRIVED AND I GOT ON THE BUS, IT WAS, EXACTLY, 3:03 PM, BUT BY THE TIME THE TIME SHOWED UP ON THE CAMERA, IT WAS 3:05 PM, AND SHE WAS, WAITING TO PULL OUT OF THE DRIVEWAY GOING SOUTH, THE ONLY CAR IN THE PARKING LOT AT THAT TIME! WAS SHE HEADING TO THE LIBRARY, I FIGURED WHAT HAPPENED WITH THE "HP" THAT I USED THE FIRST DAY, SO, IT GOT AN IMPRINT OF MY LIBRARY CARD NUMBER, SO IT WOULD REGISTER FOR HER, AT HOME, AS IF SHE WERE AT THE LIBRARY, SITTING HER FAT ASS ON MY LAP, THIS TWISTED, BITCH ASS SISTER, THEN, ALL THE REST OF THE LIBARY COMPHTERS ARE THE "SAMSUNG" SO BELOW, THE "HP" AND I THOUGHT THAT WAS A BIT EXPENSIVE FOR THE LIBRARY, BUT, NOT ON MY $30 MILLION A DAY OR MORE, BLOGGING CHECKS! JUST TO CHECK THIS OUT, THE NEXT DAY, I SPECIFICALLY, ASKED FOR THE "HP" AND IT WAS SITTING ON THE COUNTER, I AM BETTING, WAITING FOR SHELLEY TO COME PICK IT UP! SO, ON, WEDNESDAY, I WAS GIVEN THE "HP" TO GET IT CODED, THEN, I GOT THE SO MUCH, LESS QUALITY, IN ALL WAYS, "SAMSUNG" ON THURSDAY, THEN ON FRIDAY, I ASKED FOR THE "HP" BUT I BET THAT ONE IS GOINE FROM THIS POINT ON! WARRANT TO SEARCH, WHEREVER SHE IS LIVING AS ME! MAYBE IN HELENA! THAT IS WHERE SHE STOLE OR TOOK OVER MY "FUEL FITNESS" MEMBERSHIP WHEN, I FIRST CAME, FOR A MONTH, BACK IN ABOUT, APRIL OF 2012, THEN SHE TURNED IT INTO A 5 MONTH MEMBERSHIP, ALL AT MY EXPENSE . . . THIS IS HOW THAT DO IT, BABY. YESTERDAY, I TRIED ON, ON THE SAMSUNG TO CLOSE OUT MY "SUMMIT FITNESS" MEMBERSHIP, I GOT IN JULY, THAT IS LIKELY MORPHED WITH THE MEMBERSHIP, I GOT IN FEBRUARY, OR SOME OTHER TIME, MAYBE, LAST OCTOBER, BUT, SOMEONE WAS, RIGHT ON MY ASS, NEVER COULD GET THE EMAILS ADDRESS, SO I COULD CANCEL, TRIED EVERY WHICH WAY TO END IT, BUT, TO NOT AVAIL! FROM, FUEL FITNESS, TO THE SUMMIT, THESE FUCKS HAVE, STOLEN, ALL TO MIX, MATCH AND ATTACH, TO TAKE OVER MY LIFE, JUST LIKE THEY ARE DOING EVERYTHING, AND BEING ALLOWED TO DO IT WITH THE HELP OF ALL, GOVERMENT, AGENTS, ASSETS, PROGRAMS AT TAX PAYER EXPENSE, WORTH OF DEATH FROM SPIES! FUCK'EM AND IF YOU DON[T HAVE THE STOMACH TO FUCK'EM, I WILL SHOOT, STAB, ELECTROCUTE, OR DO WHATEVER IS NECESSARY TO FUCKING GET THEM THE FUCK OUT OF MY LIFE! THAT SAME, DICK HEAD, ROBO SHELLEY'S ASS COP, GOT ON BUS, #12, THIS AFTERNOON, SOMETIME AFTER, LUNCH, ABOUT HALF WAY, WEARING THE SAME THING AS YESTERDAY . . . FOOLED HIM AGAIN, AS WE HIT THE UNIVERSITY, I STARTED TO PUT ON MY BACKPACK, I WAS WEARING A BRIGHT RED, BLANKET, AND AS WE HIT, AURTHER AND EDDY, WHERE THE LAW SCHOOL IS, HE BOLTED OUT THE DOOR, AND I STAYED ON THE BUS! FUCKED HIM AGAIN! LOL. SO IN NEED OF REAL TRAINING, NOT SHELLEY , SHIT, ON MY NAME AND LAW DEGREE, WITHOUT ANY EXPERIENCE BEING TAILED OR CHASED! SHIT I HAVE 24/7, FOR THE LAST 7 YEARS, CONSTANT CONTACT! EXPERIENCE MATTERS AND MUCH AS SIZE! EXTREME DANGER. --SHANNON MCKENNA. NEVER PLAY IT SAFE . . . A FEW, APPROPRIATE EXERPTS FROM THE BOOK I AM READING! FUNNY, PRETTY CLOSE TOT HE TRUTH IN MY CASE! MEET ME IN THE FIREWHOLE, BELOW . . . .

THE UGLY TRUTH!

• Her thoughts harried her like a hungry dog with a bone.  What the hell was wrong with her, anyhow?  Where were her wires crossed?  She was a good person, damn it.  Smart, sensible, practical, hardworking, unselfish.  Relatively pretty, if not a raving beauty.  She gave all she could to her family, her job.  Her fiance'.  She deserved better.   She tried so freaking hard.  All the time.
• But such qualities evidently did not give men erections.  Men wanted a whole different set of attributes and gifts.  Men wanted women like Kaia.  The pigs.
• she goes on to describe what she was thinking, about white picket fences, kids, mud rooms, soccer games, and, being a politician's wife . . .all the while . . .
• Ready, willing and able to perform a blow job on Justin as he drove down a busy city street.  IN Becca's own car, no less.  AS it happened, Justin's driving had been no match for Kaia's skill at fellatio.  Becca's car had ended up wrapped around a telephone pole smack in the middle of a busy shopping district.  It was blind luck that he hadn't killed someone.  Or many someones.
• Kaia now sported a collar and head brace.  And as for Justin, well.  A ring of tooth marks on that bastard's dick was the last that he deserved.  Becca could not find it in her heart to feel sorry for him.
• It had just been a goodbye, for old times' sake, Justin had protested, as soon as he was lucid enough to talk.  He'd implied that Becca's should be grateful he'd gone for oral sex, not vaginal penetration.  How noble of him, to sacrifice his own pleasure out of respect for his fiancee.  She ought to be overcome with gratitude at his manly restraint.  (I could have written this!  LOL.  Good ridance, right!)
• A storybook princess with a ring on her finger, she'd been recast in a crass burlesque.  And  not even a lead role!
•  . . . new scene, Becca is at a friend's house on some island, mourning her sad, situation and cancelled wedding plans, swimming in a pool of some man, who has let her friend, use the pool for years, trespassing, when she does it, she is, thought to be, a female assassin, waiting for the dude who owned the house . . . enter Mr. Hot, whatever, paid killer . . . case of mistaken identity . . .
• Jesus.  How?  Who?  This op was so fucking secret and mysterious, he didn't even know a lot of the details himself.  Who knew about his cover, other than Tam?  Had Ludmilla turned on him?
• he grabs her out of the pool, drags her in the house, hand-cuffs her to the stairs, then . . . of course, he is attracted to her, and she him . . .
• He'd have to take a closer look.  The idea sent a surge of interest into his groin.  His one-eyed snake didn't care if the bathing beauty was an icy-hearted killer.
• Sometimes he wondered how men lived to adulthood, let alone old age, with that much concentrated stupidity dangling between their legs!
• this chick finds herself, in the middle of some big Russian, mob activity, that her new, love interest is involved in too . . .
• The Big Z might have pissed off Daddy Novak.  
• these psycho dudes were not known for their loyalty when billions were at stake. (Don't I know that to be true, on my blogging money . . . maybe all their greed will, turn them on each other, and they will do what mobs do, and knock each other off!)

This gun's for hire, even if it's just dancing in the dark!

SORRY KIDS, THE TOOTH FAIRY, STOPS COMING AFTER A CERTAIN AGE!  I STILL SUFFER FROM, TEENAGE INVINCIBILITY SYNDROME, OR THIS CAN NEVER HAPPEN TO ME, OR, MY BODY WOULD NEVER, OR MY TEETH WOULD NEVER . . . NEWSFLASH . . . ABOUT EVERY 10 YEARS, I DO SOMETHING SO STUPID, THAT, IT REMINDS ME OF JUST HOW HUMAN, AND FRAIL, THESE MORTAL BODIES ARE, TEETH TOO!

THE RED HOT DRIED, CHILI PEPPER, I GOT STUCK UNDER MY FANG TOOTH, AFTER ORDERING, DOMINOS PIZZA, THE LAST NIGHT I WAS, IN ST. GEORGE, UTAH, STAYING IN MOTEL 6 . . . I ATTACKED THIS FOREIGN OBJECT, WITH MUCH THE SAME VIGOR, AND VIOLENCE I DO A LAW CASE . . . TOOTH PICKS, FLOSS, POINTED GREEN PLASTIC OBJECTS, WITH FLOSS, MY FINGERNAILS, MY TONGUE, SUCKING THE SHIT OUT OF MY TOOTH, TO DRAW THE LITTLE DRIED SEED, OUT FROM UNDER MY TOOTH . . . THE SEED IS STILL THERE, AND NOW, I HIT, MY LOWER TEETH WITH THAT ONE TOOTH, IN JUST THE RIGHT WAY, TO BREAK MY GUMS LOOSE, ALREADY FUCKED, FROM MY TOOTH, NOW, IT LOOKS, LIKE, I AM GOING TO LOSE MY TOOTH!

SCREAMMMMMM!

FAR TOO AGGRESSIVE, DREW BLOOD, SUCKED HARD ENOUGH, TO PULL A DUDE'S DICK RIGHT OFF HIS BALLS!  LOL.  FUCK, HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN TO SUCH A NICE PERSON!

I THINK IT IS PAYBACK FOR, ME, ACTING LIKE GETTING, TEETH IMPLANTS, WAS NOT BIG DEAL, DIDN'T COST THAT MUCH, AND TELLING COWBOY IN ALL HIS MONEY, NEW HOUSES, HE SHOULD, BUY A NEW SET OF TEETH!

JOKES ON ME!

NOW THE WEBSITES, I LOOKED UP FOR HIM, I NEED!

BAD THINGS HAPPEND TO GOOD PEOPLE, PARTICULARLY IF THEY ARE ABUSIVE AND AGGRESSIVE WITH THEIR OWN BODIES AND TEETH!  MY TOOTH IS JUST HANGING THERE, LIKE A SECOND GRADER, WAITING TO SING, ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS MY NEW "FANG" TOOTH!

THAT MIGHT BE TRUE1

$198 FOR AN EXTRACTION, BECAUSE, NOW, I AM, HANDLING MY TEETH WITH KIT GLOVES, TOO AFRAID TO CHEW, FOR FEAR, I WILL SWALLOW THIS TOOTH, NOW SO LOOSE, PROBABLY COULD, TAKE ONE BITE AND IT WILL FALL OUT!

JUST $999 FOR ONE IMPLANT!

FUCK!

THAT WAS OKAY WHEN I WAS PRACTICING LAW, BUT, ON SOCIAL SECURITY, FUCK NO!

NOT LOL!

I REMEMBER, MY LITTLE OHIO FARM GIRL FRIEND ANNIE, TELLING ME THAT THE REASON SHE HAS NO TEETH IS BECAUSE, SHE, TOOK TOO GOOD OF CARE OF HER TEETH, FLOSSED THEM TOO MUCH, AND, AS A RESULT, SHE DAMAGED HER GUMS, AND GOT A DISEASE, AND THEY ALL FELL OUT, SO BAD, THAT, SHE CAN'T EVEN GET DENTURES, BECAUSE, THE GUM LINE IS GONE!

WHY DIDN'T I LISTEN TO HER!

SHIT CAN HAPPEN TO YOU!

BE CAREFUL!

I HAVE SHATTERED MY ANKLES, BROKEN ALL BUT THE FEMUR, IN A SIMILAR ACT OF SHEAR STUPIDITY, I HAVE TORN MY BACK MUSCLES, PUSHING MY LEG, TO DO WHAT THE OTHER ONE DOES, NOW THIS!

WHAT IS THE OBJECT LESSON I CAN LEARN FROM THIS?

BE GENTLE WITH ALL PARTS OF YOUR BODY, BIG AND SMALL!

OUR BODIES CAN BREAK, TEAR, BLEED, AND GET FUCKED UP, IN A NEW YORK SECOND!

THERE ARE NO RETAKES, NO RERUNS, NO, DO OVERS!

I HAVE NEVER HAD ANYONE GUESS ME AS HOMELESS, THE BILLIONAIRE ON BROADWAY, BUT WITH A MISSING TOOTH, FOR SOME REASON, THAT SEEMS TO FIT!

SCREAM.

IT COULD ALWAYS BE WORSE, RIGHT?

THE REASON, WOMEN, ALWAYS, WATCH, TRUE CRIME OR ARE ADDICTED TO THE MURDER SHOWS, IS THAT IT MAKES THEM FEEL BETTER, ABOUT THIS OR THAT, BY THINKING, AT LEAST I AM NOT THAT POOR SOP!

KEEP THINGS IN PERSPECTIVE!

I WAS SUPPOSE TO BE DEAD, 19 YEARS AGO, AND, EVERYDAY FOR THE LAST, 7 YEARS, SOMEONE HAS BEEN TRYING TO KILL ME, SO A TOOTH, NO BIG DEAL!

P.S., BOTH SHELLEY AND RACHEL, HAVE PORCELAIN TEETH!
DENTAL RECORDS MIGHT BE A CLUE!
MINE ARE REAL!