MUSCLE CAR--BRAINS ON BROADWAY--MESSIN' WITH SASQUATCH OR GOOD PUBLIC HEALTH--HOT SEX, BOTH IN AND OUT OF MARRIAGE--FUN SEX, WAY FUN! NO MORE CRAP, WE HAVE A SOLUTION--LUCK THAT LASTS A LIFETIME--ULTIMATE BEAUTY--LOVE CHANGES EVERYTHING; GREAT ARTICLE IN THE MISSOULA, INDEPENDENT, I BELIEVE LAST VALENTINE'S DAY--MAYBE? GOOD INFO WHATEVER TIME OF YEAR IT CAME! KEEP UP THE PEACE TALKS, RUSSIA, UKRAINE, GERMANY & FRANCE--SHOW THE WORLD HOW MATURE LEADERS HANDLE PROBLEMS, START THE TIDE OF A WORLD WITHOUT VIOLENCE, BLOODSHED, AND DEATH, TODAY! OUR PRAYERS ARE WITH YOU! AWEFUL LOT OF BIG ROCK, LOLO, MONTANA . . . FOUR PLAY, THE LORE OF FOUR--REALLY, JUST ALL ME! LOL! EXTREME INTERNET, VOTE AGAINST INTERNET NEUTRALITY, OR GOVERNMENT CONTROL OF THE INTERNET, WE DON'T WANT IT UNDER THE COMMUNICATIONS ACT, OR CONTROLLED IN ANY WAY SHAPE FOR FORM . . . THINGS LIKE MY BLOG WOULD BE BANNED! AND THAT WOULD BE A TRAGEDY, LOL!

Platonic Dream With Old Flame & Brother-in-Law

The other night, after I wrote the first serial, of fun sex, I had this interesting dream with my old junior high, and college boyfriend, whom, I lined up with my little sister, because while he was on  his Mormon mission in Germany, I married a missionary, and also former boyfriend, who went to Holland, but I had the dubious, task of writing the dreaded, Dear John Letter, famous to missionaries, and military alike, that a former love interest, had lost interest, or moved on, or found someone new.  Mark continued to contact me for 5 years after I was married, wanting me to go to a high school class reunion, Bountiful High, 1973, or something else.  Finally, I called him up and decided to do a reality check, and meet with him, bringing my two darling daughters with me, for him to see, there was a daddy involved in this family, and I had long moved on.  However, as well all, know, the heart is tender, and old feelings are not so easily erased, so a bit tense and times, after I lined Mark, a very successful, Periodontist, or a dentist for children, and he is great at it, but, before that time, I hooked him up with my younger sister, of 5 years.  They are still married, and they make a great couple, with a beautiful family.

The dream was simple, and straight forward, Mark, wearing a royal blue, dress shirt, always, the ZZ Top, Well Dressed Man, he just came up and hugged me, that was it.  I woke up wondering, what was that all about?  I haven't seen Mark for several years, so, the dream came as a surprise to me.  However, not in the context, of what I had written about fun sex, healing sex, and healthy relationships . . . as do most couples, especially, ones who are raised to dismiss sex and feelings for so long, until they are married, and nothing wrong with that, and marriage is a good public health issues--committed couples generally, have better sex!  It is the TRUST component!  But, I remember, Marcie, the 5th of 6 Southwick daughters, coming back from Oklahoma, after being married a short time, and telling me a funny, but somewhat sad, story of the first night, that she decided to be venturesome and sex, buying a hot red, if I remember, sex pot negligee of some sort, and Marcie had a great body, still does, takes care of herself well.  Mark may have made the comment he made to Marcie, to me, given, I was not blessed with the stellar body she was, big boobs and all, thin legs.

Valentine Delight or Shell Shocked?

So, Marcie, not so brave about this whole sex thing, decided to surprise Mark, and be the aggressor, the promoter, and the instigator of sex, probably for once, knowing Marcie!  LOL!  But, she walked in the room, showing off her newly acquired sexual promoting apparel, and Mark, I think taken back by this, said, Marc . . . what are you doing?  So the timid wife, not expecting, that response, ran in the bathroom, and I don't think, if memory serves, 40 years, ever had sex that night, and I believe it was Valentine's Day, and what Marcie thought Mark would like, and desire her in.  Mormons!  My second husband, Jerry, did a similar thing to his, hot body, sexy wife, beautiful too, and on their honeymoon, he was fishing on a bright sunny, fall, afternoon, warm, romantic, to me, regardless of whether I am with someone or not.  But, Trudy, decided to surprise Jerry, and she came slowly and carefully, walking over the smooth rocks in the stream, where he was fishing, completely naked, to have some afternoon, delight . . . he turned as saw her, and said, something like Mark, what do you think you are doing, go get some clothes on . . . he told me, after their divorce, not surprised, that she was absolutely stunning and beautiful, and I asked, why he didn't just go attack her, and make lover to her?

Is this an issue of priorities, roles in sex, stereotypes of who is the aggressor, the hunter and the prey, or just bad timing, or shock at the unexpected behavior of a wife?  Sex is complicated, but, the responses were not what the daring wife, who really was not so daring, were expecting.  Did the movies, forget to show, sexuality between spouses, and so this threw the game off?  I am not sure.  But, Mark, who, like most men, might be somewhat to blame, going way back, for the lack of spontaneity, fun, and adventure in their marriages.  Sex is not about just you, just your sex drive, or just your timing, when you are jacked up.  Maybe the right thing to do, is reverse the situation, and have the men, married or not, ask themselves, if, some of these issues are creeping in, and they are expecting a lover, spouse, to respond when they want sex, but timing is important, but so is giving, at the appropriate time . . . Perhaps the dream, was just saying thanks for the information, and it might help him understand his sex partner and wife, for the last, at least 35 years!  Congrats!

Insensitive Wives Can Be Just As Bad

I don't know the background, on Greg and Bonnie, but they had been high school sweethearts, but there had always been signs of abuse on her part, and Greg tried to save her, she was a project for him.  Greg was and is a successful attorney, and a partner with his brothers, in Sprinkler World, his share was worth $40 million dollars.  He had at one time, had a record deal with Columbia Records, and to this day, still plays with the same, high school friends, who come form all over the country to get together, or at least they did when I was dating him, back in late 1999.  But, a very smart guy . . . in everything but marriage.  One night, when he knew the marriage was having problems, he filled the jet tub, with bubbles, put candles all over the bathroom, got in the bath, and put a bow, like a present on his head.  Bonnie walked in, and said, No, I don't think so, and turned a walked away!

Love, Regardless of Marriage, Has Got to Enter In--DO NO HARM! 

Sex is a powder keg, waiting to go off, if we do not handle it well.  Sex and money are the two top reasons for divorce, we can eliminate one of those, simply be being more considerate to our spouses, or lovers, and being sensitive, to what they are trying to either do, or say, through their actions.  It may not be the best time, the right time, or you may not want sex, but the rejection is a KILLER!  I don't know all the answers, but I do know, that these examples, can start a marriage off wrong, end a relationship, and bring a lot of hurt and misunderstanding into the couple.  Communication is probably critical, honesty, the truth, tolerance, love all need to be employed!  Sex is intimate, you are exposing yourself, your feelings, your body, opening yourself up to this person, who can either nurture the love you have for each other, or they can destroy the loving feelings, and all of the determination is in your hands, or your heard, or your mind!  

Once words of criticism, rejection, postponing the sex or the moment, things, may never be the same again.  You are literally, messin' with Sasquatch!  Some woman, I met in Butte, a month ago, didn't even get her name out her mouth, and she said, I need to find a husband, now!  Okay, but she made the statement, that if sex is good in marriage or in a relationship, it is only 60% important, but if it is bad, it becomes, 90% important . . . I would say, that is somewhat inflated, and sex can be overrated, while being very important!  I got into a conversation with a woman yesterday, and just caught the part of the conversation that said, sex is overrated, don't you think, she said, turning to me.  Apparently, her husband and her, have no had sex for 5 years, and she made some reference to his injury, I had no idea about.  But she said, she loved him . . . there is the magic word, LOVE, and in spite of the lack of sex, they were still very much in love!  Yesterday, I saw them, hugging and being playful with each other . . . playful sexuality, can be very rewarding too!

Bible Reference to Playful, Fun Sex . . . Abraham and Sarah

One of my favorite parts of the Bible, due to the fun thoughts of what the father of nations, was doing to his wife, but Abraham, lied to the King about the his marital status, telling the King, that he and Sarah were either cousins, or brother and sister.  Sarah was beautiful, and Abraham was afraid the King, seeing her beauty, would kill Abraham, for Sarah, to take her as one of his wives.  The way the King, who felt, very betrayed by the lie, found out they were more than related, but that they were married, was that he noticed the playful nature of their interactions, and I am sure, they were of a sexual type, because it is implied!  I love that, and I know what that feels like!  Here again, you have to have trust, love, and a playful nature, call it foreplay, or whatever, it is the stuff, that prepares a partner, for sex, not hitting them between the eyes, cold, and unexpected; however, if the other happens, go with the flow and enjoy it!  The unexpected is always fun, if you don't have sexual hang-ups.

FUN SEX II--Live Like You Are Dying!  With Caveats!

One day, some man is going to be very lucky to get me, because, it had taken so many to break this mustang down, seriously, both, learning to trust, love, relax, enjoy, experiment, dismiss mishaps, there are always preferences, exploration, and limits, as you progress in a personal sexual revolution!  I am 60, and I am just finally, getting to the point, that I think, I could be good to a man, treat him, like something other than an object, with feelings, not just some dog in heat, trying to get in my pants!  LOL!  My second husband, Jerry, always worried, while we were dating, that is very non-committed girlfriend, would run off with some other guy, and do whatever, thinking that men are pure in their motives for sex, and what their objectives were and are!  That either was really good advice, or tainted me, making me think, that is all a man wants, leaving most in the dust, and missing some really good guys along the way, even now!

They Say, The Third Time is the Charm--Sexually, For Me, It Was

When you are told that you are dying, you tend to live a bit differently, seriously, all abandon!  So, I am standing outside of Alberstons Food Store, in Logan, Utah, and this hot guy approaches me, and says Hi.  I didn't think much about it.  But when he returned, he stopped and started up a conversation, having just purchased an  Architectural Digest Magazine, brains, I like that, and I had heard that meeting someone at the grocery store is a good place to meet either men or women.  Why?  Because, they are generally, taking care of a home, shopping for food, not dates, and they tend to be more stable and good citizens . . . Brett turned into Charles Manson and the Family, mine, later!  

Fun sex, may have been the reason!  LOL!  I asked Brett, where he lived, and he told me on a 23 acre farm, in Mount Sterling, Utah . . . cool, like that.  He then asked me if I wanted to go see it, hell, yeah, I am going to die anyway, so, I might as well have some excitement, but I was on my period, therefore, I felt safe in going to his house . . . I didn't have experience with country boys, a little blood, to a hunter, who guts animals, is nothing.  I had no idea, what lay ahead of me that might, but I might as well, take this good-looking guy up on his offer, and I did.  Oh, how important and easy things go for men, with a goal, when they use a little romance, some smooth tactics, play a few songs on the guitar, put on shorts, so your great legs show, and ask your new house guest, to rub some lotion on you legs . . . just like magic!

Brett was turning an old horse barn into a straw bale house, an environmentally new construction, I always, learned from him and he was a reader.  But, the house was rough, no running water, little electricity, other than between us, and a green hospital bed, that was a bit, larger than a twin, but not much, and Brett, asks me to stay the night.  I am on my period, so, who cares.  Now, believe it or not, this turned me on--I had been married to a city planner, and he was not into nature, the outdoors, hunting, although he did get a buck and we had antlers on the wall, in our first home, but over all, if I was on my period, that was not the time to have sex, just a given.  The Bible even states, that a woman is unclean for 7 days, after her period, a time of cleansing.  It wasn't a big deal, but, a totally new experience for me, and I dug it.  The blood and guts, I mean, earthy, natural, basic, and a huge turn on!

Out Goes One Plug, In Goes Another!  LOL!

I decide, what the hell, I don't have anywhere to go, I am dying, so I decide to stay the night. The night is romantic, and the farthest thing, from my mind, is that, while kissing and messing around, that we are going to have sex, that just wasn't an option up for grabs.  He starts getting more and more, turned on and making more and more advances, until I have to lower the bomb and tell him, that we just have bad timing, and I am on my period.  He didn't say a thing, reached up the t-shirt dress I had on, and just grabbed the plug, my tampon, and replugged me up with his own version of a plug!  LOL!  I saw shocked at the swift act of taking care of the problem, and all was well, just a little while latter.  Cement floors, at this point, although, I don't think carpet would have deterred him, and that little bloody, object, was disposed of, and it would be dealt with in the morning!

My prudish little world, of reasons not to have sex, or using a period as a protection, or even thinking of blood as being impure or a dirty part of a woman, all disappeared in one grab, and toss!  LOL!  Oh, well, I guess that is that . . . LOL!  I woke up to a mountain of September, sunflowers, covering the whole fall, foothills, outside the little barn/house.  Love had sprung, my favorite time of the year, and a gift from God for this dying woman . . . that was about 7 years ago!  LOL!  But, maybe God, knew, that he had to do something to loosen me up, so I could enjoy the pleasures of this delicious life!  And I did.  We took a hike, up to a tree, not far above the house, and Brett wanted to make love again.  I said, I am bleeding a big more, as if I had just said, my hair is in my face, let me move it.  And again, just like my blood was the nourishment of life to him, he didn't care, and proceeded to make love to me, in the weeds, in the dirt, and in front of God, angels and all witnesses, who might have been seeing anything that day.  We hiked to a pipeline, and again, we made love, fun, spontaneous and up on the top of a mountain, pretty remote, I am not much of an exhibitionist.  But, I had no hangups about my body, blood, imperfections, nor did I feel at all inadequate, but completely loved, safe, and appreciative . . . it is amazing, what healing can take place, one partner to another!

I never left his house, that day, or for the next 18 months, other than to go somewhere occasionally.  He worked at a factory, allegedly, and came home every lunch, to eat, and make love, which became like eating to both of us, our sustenance as a couple . . . often with him, begging for mercy, as one love making session would end and as soon as I would start kissing him, the flag pole was up!  Ever ready batteries, at times he wanted to work.  He would beg for mercy on the weekends, I could not get enough of him and sexually, we matched up well.  I was happy just looking at him, watching his body move, the muscles, the tussled dark hair, fun, lazy, and cool, in the early months.  I would say, we had sex, on weekends, at least 5 to 8 times, all fun, all happy, and all fulfilling.  We made love everywhere we went, until one day, I had actually been a rebound, he met me a day after he had broken up with some girl at the college, actually two former girls.  Lack of trust entered the relationship, when he went to the college, and didn't take me with him, which was rare . . . I remember, sitting watching the rain, a white dog came into the yard, indicating, yeah, men are like dogs in heat, and a bag of CHEETOS, tumbled across our yard--God my Intel man, always let's me know what is going on.  Everything changed from that day on, so he has nobody to blame but himself, the games started, the lack of trust started, but we still had fun.  I am just going to tell you about two funny sexual encounters, to give you some ideas.

Every Bone In My Body Is Tired, But ONE!  LOL!

We were going down to meet my parents for the first time.  We did a strange marriage, legal, and real, but my parents, didn't accept it as the real thing, because it was very unconventional, people wanted dates and details, preachers name and whatever.  When I was teaching family law at the University of Utah, the first semester, a student, asked me if Utah had common law marriages.  I was not sure, but I knew where to find out, and we didn't, but Utah something called a non-solemnized marriage.  There were five conditions, and we met all of them, but the families, were a bit hesitant to take it as a real marriage, just like many do, with common law marriages.  I was dying and I could not see any reason to go to the formality of having a judge or justice of the peace marry us, I explained it to Brett, and he agreed with me, if that was what I wanted.  

So, when I called my mother to say we were coming do to visit, she asked me, if we would rather stay at the small home of my parents, or go to a motel, and she would pay, that was an indication, she was not dealing well, with her very, wild, unconventional daughter and her new husband.  We went to the hotel, and to our surprise, after a long day, getting the truck cleaned, packed, dogs taken care of, and the 7 hour drive done, the walls were a gross dark blue, there was a picture of a tiger on the wall, and we both just looked at each other, and laughed, which we often did . . . is this salt in the wound, or what, this room is cheap and hideous.  So, Brett insisted we go get another room on our bill, and we did.  He had done much of the work, so I wasn't particularly worn out, but he had worked hard.  We were laying in bed, just talking, and I was giving him some peace, not getting sexual, kind of non-sexual touching, when all of the sudden, as a hint that, yeah, he was tired, but there was one member of his body, that was not exhausted, and we laughed and laughed, until tears came to our eyes, given the stupid, hotel, the stress of the parents, and all, but there was still one bone in his body that was not tired!  LOL!  And you know the rest of the story!

And She Just Couldn't Swallow It . . . Simulcast, NPR, Commentary!

Brett and I were just sitting around, one afternoon, he had worked in the yard, we worked in the house, and we were taking a break, listening to NPR, National Public Radio, the only constant form of entertainment in our house, without TV.  Like I said, before, oral sex, was not something I did often to any husband, but, for some reason, that day, he was looking particularly relaxed, handsome, and just kicking back on a chair or rocker, when I decided to surprise him, with some of that afternoon, delight.  I had never, swallowed cum before, nor really tasted in, but this particular time, I thought, well, many people do this, so, why not, but I was completely unsure, just what you do, having given a blow job, but, what next, and how exactly do you do this, and what is the deal.  I am very cerebral, so, the nuts and bolts of this were important, and he had no idea what was going on, just totally enjoying the moment, but both of us were listening to the radio too.

Just as he started to ejaculate, I started having second thoughts about it, being kind of a bit, taken back by the amount of cum, and whatnot, and just as I was thinking, NPR, radio, said, as I took a towel and spit the cum out, with the radio announcer, saying, and she just couldn't swallow it!  LOL!  Both of us, just busted up laughing, I was gagging and wiping my mouth off, and he was just enjoying the seen, not offended, but just taking it all in stride . . . LOL!  That is fun sex, trusting sex, accepting sex, understanding sex, and good clean fun!  What husbands and wives should be doing together, non-judgmental, not expecting the earth to quake under their feet for trembling pleasure, just going with the flow, understanding where the person is coming from, and just accepting what is going on, rolling with it, and laughing at ourselves.  I was very funny, we laughed for a while.  Sex like that, makes you at ease, comfortable, and whatever, very healing!

ALONG THIS LINE, I JUST WANTED TO MENTION AN ARTICLE I READ A YEAR AGO, IN THE MISSOULA INDEPENDENT, ABOUT LOVE, ACCEPTING SEX, AND FUN SEX, REGARDLESS OF PERFECT BODIES, AND PEOPLE!

Some chick, wanted thank the men in her life, boyfriends, lovers, friends, and associates, as I recall she was an editor or writer for the magazine.  She went on to say how thankful and blessed she had been, meeting and dealing with the men, she had in work, home, personal and whatever.  How truly caring they were, how good they had made her feel about her inadequacies, her body, her mind, and her life.  That she knew she was not perfect and they loved her, made love to her, and cared for her in her imperfections, and what a joy that was to her life.  I would give a resounding applause, because a partner, a brother, a friend, a lover's words, can make all the difference in the way someone feels about their bodies, which goes directly into the sexual part of their lives, and God bless the men that make women feel good.  

Guys, just don't think about it like women do, most of them, like studies show, that 96% of the men, think they look great, that may be due to the fact, that all their body parts are covered, and undisclosed to the naked eye, unlike women, with breast size, that old T&A, deal, rating systems, and the news stands, packed with perfect looking women, 10 to 1, women to men, holding standards so high for women, that one in a thousand will ever look like that, and to be made to feel completely loved, sexy, beautiful, and amazing by a partner, will only bring you back endless benefits, in her making love to a man, she digs and trusts . . . then both sides win.  Women, about 64% say they are basically comfortable with their bodies, I would say that is high!

The media, airbrushing, computer enhancement, etc., have done us harm, and in so doing, have done men harm.  Therefore, the way to combat this phenomena, is for the men, in their women's lives, to compliment, and love regardless of the perfect shape, love them for who they are, not how they show off on your arm, especially for college age.  At BYU, my freshman year, they said, that 80% of the guys, dated only 20% of the female student body, looking for the perfect bodies, which most just don't have, good, but not perfect.  I remember, my roommate was dating this buy in a semi-frat house, on campus.  He really had fun with her, liked her, but when homecoming came, he pushed me to go to the dance with him, so he could show me off to his friends!  I was totally disgusted and I told him in no uncertain terms what I thought about a guy who, loves or cares for someone in private, but is ashamed of them in public, or wants a more flashy girl!

A beautiful cover, does not a good book make, or a good partner, or a good mother, or a good lover!  Looks can only take you so far, and you better have a whole lot more going on for most guys, and the same for most girls.  I have been with some very handsome guys, but if there isn't anything but good looks, I will opt for the less handsome!  Happy hunting and happy sex!

Time for Lunch, and U of Montana Birthday Bash, 155 Years and Counting . . . Let's Party!

Serial Fun Sex III Tomorrow--I Would Call This, Majestic Madness, the name of a local store, but also, symbolic . . . I don't share with with you to be an exhibitionist, or dirty, or to shock you . . . I do, if for Better Marriages, Health Relationships, and All That Jazz!

P.S., Just a comment on the local rock slide, cleaning up tons of fallen rock, we had one out side of Utah, about that size, and it to the Utah Department of Transportation 6 months to a year to clean up, so Montana Department of Transportation, getting something that size cleaned up, in what a day or two, is a feet worth noting, and done just like Montana does things, let's GIT-R-DONE!  Good job, MDOT! 

 

THE STRAY BULLET--FUN SEX, PART II, MESSIN' WITH SASQUATCH--FRENCH DIGNITARY GOES DOWN IN SEXUAL FLAMES--BUYING SEX IS NOT AGAINST THE LAW, BUT PAYING PROSTITUES, FOR WILD ASS PARTIES OR SORIES, IN PARIS, WASHINGTON, D.C., AND OTHER PLACES, IS! WE CREATE OUR OWN HEAVEN & HELL, AND SEX IS A BIG PART OF BOTH! THE REPUBLICAN LEGISLATURE, COULDN'T GET A DRESS CODE, BUT NOW, THEY ARE ATTEMPTING TO PASS A BILL, FOR ME AND YOU, THAT NONE OF US, CAN WEAR YOGA PANTS! SOUNDS LIKE UTAH'S LEGISLATURE, IF A MAN HAS SEX WITH HIS WIFE, CAN AN UNCONSCIOUS WIFE SCREAM RAPE? HOW WOULD SHE KNOW? LOL! SEX IS A POWDER KEG, IT'S NOT A PASSION; IT'S AN OBESSION . . . MANY OF YOU, REPUBLICANS, IN PARTICULARLY, WILL THINK I AM DIRTY, BECAUSE I ENJOY SEX, HAVE HAD MORE THAN ONE PARTNER, AND CAN'T GET ENOUGH OF SEX WITH LOVE ATTACHED . . . LOVE CLEANSES ANY, AGREED UPON ACT OF SEX, THAT BOTH PARTNERS AGREE TO, CONSENTUALLY, IN GOOD FAITH BELIEF THAT WHAT IS DONE, IS ACCEPTABLE TO BOTH PARITES (GOD--HUSBAND'S & WIFE'S, SHOULD COME TOGETHER OFTEN; THE MARRIAGE BED IS UNDEFILED; ALL THINGS ARE PURE TO ME . . . IF YOU CAN DO IT IN FAITH, WITHOUT CAUSING SOMEONE TO FALL, OR DISBELIEVE, IT'S OKAY WITH THE BIG GUY--ROMAN'S 14:14) FUN, FUN, FUN AND LIVELY TIMES! SEXUAL HEALING, SO COOL! SAD NEWS, JON STEWART OF THE DAILY SHOW, COMEDY CENTRAL, GOING OFF THE AIR, GOVERNMENT CAN'T TAKE SATIRE! THEY ALREADY GOT RID OF COLBERT, OF THE COLBERT REPORT, PUT HIM IN DAVE LETTERMAN'S PLACE . . . I GUESS THE ONLY POLITICAL SATIRIST LEFT, IS ME! SORRY! WILL BE MORE FUNNY TOMORROW, $20 BUCKS, IS MORE THAN $20 BUCKS, IT IS STOPPING AN EMPIRE, IF THEY CAN USE THIS TO CATCH A THIEF! I KNOW THERE ARE GOOD AGENTS, THE ROGUE, ARE THE GOOD ONES NOW, THE BAD OVERTOOK THEM . . . I CAN MAKE ALLEGATIONS, BUT THEY HAVE TO PROVE, WELL HERE IS THE PROOF, YOU NEED! THEY GOT THE CHARGE BACK TO THE CREDIT OR MY DEBIT CARD, THEY HAVE THE SAME NUMBERS TWO, THE DOUBLE CARD, JUST LIKE THE DOUBLE BLOG, THE DOUBLE CASE, THE DOUBLE DOCKET--GET THEM, I AM SICK OF THESE LEACHES ON MY LIFE!

The Stray Bullet--Target--Walmart $ Card

Like Al Capone, and tax fraud, I think, Target, may have seen DOUBLE VISION, and actually caught my alleged, sister double, having my Walmart money card, charge back, sent to her card, that she is allowed access to, by the Mormon NSA, hacker, Daddy War bucks, the only problem is, the war is fought, against me, with the money, I made, and they stole.  I guess billions, is not enough for these fuckers, they have to go after, even a charge back of $19.99, on a return, for a black, athletic shirt, that I returned, as far as I can tell, with evidence of behavior patterns to prove it, February 4, 2014, because, I am not a shopper, don't frequent stores, unless, there is a need for something, somewhat of a utilitarian, by my definition, someone who only has what they use, and the bare necessities or the basics are it . . . sister is a shopper, and she can spend, till the cows come home!  She is the consummate consumer, you can't get me in a store, other than to refill supplies, even at Christmas time, and that is under duress!  I fucking hate it!

You see, these fucking assholes, God, called the family, I was born into, materialistic, and believe, in the Mormon Bible, the Book of Mormon, that only the righteous shall prosper, and they will lie, cheat, steal, fake, cover up, and collude, conspire, and collaborate, to appear to be successful, to do it . . . no wholes barred!  They have long talked of the Have's & the Have not's!  Remember Mitt Romney's, stupid statement, the one that most likely got him, un-elected, un-friended, and un-wanted by any party, especially, his own, the one about the 47%!  I would venture a guess, that it is more like, if Mitt were to be honest, 99% of us!  I know, that Mitt and Anne, have learned their lesson, the day, Mitt, after wild and crazy, speculation, stepped down, and decided not to run in 2016, and as he and Anne, quickly left the crowd, of disappointed admirers, and supporters, he said, we, referring to his party, said, something to the effect, that we needed to meet the needs of the people . . . do you think?  

I thought the whole point of government, that we the people, created, to meet our needs, not the needs of the government, for hell sakes, a nameless, faceless, vessel, created to do certain things, like protect our rights, defend us against, domestic and foreign invasions, and basically do all in their power, to make life good for us, the average, Joe or JoAnn!  Lesson well taken, pass it on to the Mormon Church . . . although in all fairness, I have heard, through the homeless, grapevine, that all the foreclosed on homes in Utah, are being temporarily turned over to homeless people, to live in while they are empty!  Smart move, neighborhood blight, vandalism, and homes slipping into disrepair are a worry, when so many homes, Bush and his banker buddies on Wall Street, make a fortune off of us, the people, are better occupied than left standing empty, so, kudos to Utah!  I can't tell you how hard that is for me to say!  LOL!  New beginnings, maybe?

Target, May, In Fact, Be the Ones, Who Solve the Case of the Doubles

Okay, so, as usual, living on a meager, amount of money, the government, my family, the Mormon controlled, FBI, CIA, NSA, allows me to live on, what basically amounts, to ease their conscience money while they steal millions and billions over the years, and basically every time I feed the beast and write a blog that goes viral, like they all do, has been doubled down . . . favorite catch word of the government these days, to alleviate their guilty--keep her, barely alive money. 

I wasn't out of money, on February 4th, when I returned the shirt that was an XL Petite!  The clerk at the customer service, asked me if there was anything wrong with the shirt; I said, no, there is nothing wrong with the shirt, but the problem lies with me (play on the words, they have all access, surveillance, the watchers, and the technology, to credit back powers, a duplicate card with my number, and they have fucked with it before, and I have many charges now, that I don't recognize, having found Shelley, Rachel and Kay, magically, added to my card, without approval, when only my son, Elliot Taylor Secrist, was allowed a double card!), but I could barely get my arm in the shirt, and as all good utilitarians, in the world according to JoAnn, the need for it, had passed, and the need for money, was approaching, that I would rather use the money, than have the shirt, so great, I get to return it, and get back, the money . . . or like in my cases, what is a simple thing, win the case, get the money, or write the blog, have one account under Google, you own the account . . . not so fast, if Google doesn't get the money, or I refuse to put ads, my account becomes, the property of my doubles, Google, and the government, run by Mormons!  

I have no say, over it?  Really, under what rock did you guys crawl out from under, the Patriot Act Rock . . . oh, no, that is where they stole God's Revolver's music--Hard Rock Band of 2008--and subsequent releases, because, hey, all if fair to steal in this Patriot Act world, police state, surveillance state, dog eat dog world, Darwinian asshole fuckers from hell, world, that makes no sense to the rest of us . . . Robin Hood, is Robbin' from the poor, who should be rich, and Robin, should be poor, but his and his bitches are rich, Jerry, Brett, Allan aka Frank, John or Jack, Michael, Richard, Henry Brock and Jay Rice . . .  and the double take!  Wow, it is too bad, I didn't know that I could be a P.E. major, and I thought about it, be a flight attendant, or a biologist and become an attorney, or shitty attorney and ride on the coat tails of a smarter attorney, and become anything I wanted through the CIA make a wish foundation!  LOL!  I could have worn spandex, and fucked powerful, connected men, rather than beat the shit out of them, even at their own game!  LOL!  I prefer the later, girls and you will too!  We are just as smart, only prettier, and in some cases, SMARTER!  And that is not a joke!

The Shocking Return Date--Before, I Even Return It!

Yesterday, I stop by Target, just to check on the approximate time or date, having had 8, to my calculations pass, calling every day to see if the, roughly, $20, had posted back on my card, because as of yesterday, it had not posted, nor had in, in checking back, to the date that I returned the shirt.  I was dying for a Diet Coke, had no money, and decided, that I would take the clerk up on the original offer, of getting a gift card, and like a Diet Cokaholic, I could at least get my caffeine fix, satisfied.  The clerk remembered me, and she said there was not anything she could do . . . the last time my card was robbed of $159, through the Fuel Fitness in Helena, the chick that remembered me, was fired!  And I did go through the process of challenging the credit back, and won, but, even then, when the Wally's world, employee, asked me what way I wanted the fitness center to pay me back, the charge back never came, and they claimed some lame ass reason, and after a few weeks of fighting, I gave up . . . that charge back would have revealed my double had been attending the fitness center, rather than me, who plainly told them, I was just visiting, and even had my Parowan, Utah address on it, saying I was just checking out Helena, was not sure I want to live there, and paid more for the one month visit . . .  that they kept charging me for, to AUGUST, I STARTED IN APRIL TO MAY, 2012!  

So, the clerk, at Target, tells me, the best thing I can do, is call my bank, which is basically, Walmart card system, hate banks, since in St. George, Wells Fargo Bank, would not let me close one of two of my accounts, that was, assigned to my DOUBLE, so that would not work!  The fucking men in black, have been protecting the double down girls, or so I wish, for a fucking long time!  When you have a whole state of Mormons, plus all intelligence arms of the government, and your family, friends, clients, acquaintances, and anyone, you have even met at a fucking homeless shelter and mission, more than willing to join the club and lie for money . . . it is pretty hard to get a fair shake, even on $20!  

I start going back on the card, five days purchases at a time, I keep going and going, and all of the sudden, it says, that the charge back came, to my complete and utter, shock, January 29th . . . at least 4 days before, I thought I returned the shirt, and after checking the rest of my charges and their dates, and about 7 days before the EVIDENCE, FACTUAL, AND PATTERN OF BEHAVIOR, AND CLOSER TO THE TIME, I THOUGHT I MIGHT HAVE RETURNED THE SHIRT, LAST WEEK SOMETIME, NEVER THE WEEK BEFORE . . . BUT AS PAUL HARVEY SAID, HERE IS THE REST OF THE STORY!  This may bust the whole fucking Mormon mafia and government rogue agents, loose, the Al Capone affect!  That American greed, down to the last penny, they can wrestle from me, might be their downfall!  LOL!  A fucking $20, they could not let me have, because they COULD STEAL IT!

Rely on Facts, Evidence, Patterns, Character, Proof

I had always heard that charge backs took, between 7 to 10 days; therefore, just on a lark, yesterday, being the 8th day, since, I thought I returned the shirt, having, as usual, trusted the store, that I had just given the receipt to, having held on to it, longer than I ever do, since I clean out my purse of all unwanted store receipts, that clutter up the living arrangement, the bag lady style of living right now, ever extra piece of paper, adds up to load down my purse!  So, periodically, I clean it out, and do so, often, hating to carry, more than my own body weight, that is enough!  LOL!  But, truly, that is the case, this purse gets to feel like a 50 lb. burden, when hiking all over town!  I had been calling Walmart Money card service every morning for the last week!  I play, eat out, and basically have enough money to have a life, but no apartment, car, or the rest of the normal necessities, that most people need to survive . . . hey, a Diet Coke, something to eat, a warm bed, and that is about it to make me happy!  Just the basics man. 

Generally, I let a lot of things, these motherfuckers do, just go, because, it is constant, everyday, and has been for years, but, when I can't even get a Diet Coke, and I am suppose to get the $19.99 back, it is like a horse to water, I could have made it a few more days, to the aloted 10 day max for a charge back, but when I saw or rather heard, that I allegedly got the charge back, January 29, 2015, I had not even returned the shirt!  Just as I suspected, again, not my first rodeo, with these fuckin' money grubbing bitches, who watch my account, try to steal it every month, the only thing that connects me to my story, or the PIX Disease, the Utah Medical Association, thus my career, without ID, which they have summarily had stolen over the period of two year, the last of which was stolen at cousin, Edward's house, a paid staff member, and family . . . my Social Security money is it!  That is the historical connection, and they know that, so, even a small credit back, going to me, and not to the double card, can cause this whole house of cards to fall . . . billions of dollars, easy money from the blog, no sweat off either Google, the CIA, Mormon Church, family, or constitutional girls, who are in training, as to how to write like me, talk like me, write like me, argue like me . . . I BUY GOLD!  They earn shit, and so do the bastards that help them!  I am the GOLDEN GOOSE, ALWAYS HAVE BEEN!

February 4, 2014--I Purchased a Diet Coke, a Box of Chocolates, and a Box of Lemonheads, for $4.00--This Would Be the Day I Returned the Shirt!

I go through my money fast, it last me, about a week, or maybe, two, at the rate of living, I am used to . . . at the time, I returned the shirt, I refused the Target Gift Card, because I had money, at that date, so I was fine.  Had I had no money, I would have taken the gift card, so I could get a Diet Coke, which was the desperate attempt yesterday, I was going to tell them, just forget the credit back, and just give me the gift card, so I could get my fix!  I am fucking addicted!  I can go, without, when I don't have money, but if I do, I get a DC!  So, I know, (1) I hate to shop, and I only go to the store for a reason, like to return a shirt; (2) having had money, I would have surely bought a Diet Coke, which I did, and I was craving something chocolate, and the Charlie Brown and  Snoopy heart shaped boxes, with three chocolates in them, were perfect, and I found the Lemonheads, something to suck on, for later, in the bargain bin, for $1.00; and (3) had I noticed the credit back, which I didn't, because, I went to the Super Bowl party, before the buy back, got a $11.50 burger, knowing that I would still have the $20, roughly, to ease me to the next, money fix.  So, all the evidence supports, that fact that I didn't return the shirt, the 29th, or I would have purchased a Diet Coke that day.

Then the clerk, who I talk to this morning, said, that I had purchased something at Target, on January 18 . . . I had been in the Butte Rescue Mission, without a dime for three fucking weeks, so . . . who purchased something, on my card number, without any money on it, unless there is a twin card, with money on it, which, there is, in sister, Rachel's hand, or hacker Shelley, or Kay who monitor my card, faithfully!  I get a check, the third Wednesday of every month, these fucking bitches try to steal it, every month!  Now in January, last year, on my Walmart Money card, after, I had not received my new card for 2014, after a two year stint on that last card, with the ending numbers, 1944 or at least ending in 44, but couch surfing at John Bagby's, a staff member of the mafia, government, who are one in the same, he, I am sure, intercepted the new card, and I was forced to get another one!  

From that point on, I noticed, that the posting date of the government benefits--always has been and still is, for this JoAnn S. Secrist, the original, the third Wednesday of the month, with the double's posting date, being one week earlier, on the second Wednesday of the month!  I have been receiving this money, and Shelley has tried to steal, since stealing my ID, literally, not just paper ID, for, now, 15 years, as a requirement by Paul Revere Insurance, through the Utah Medical Association, that my father is still collecting, suppose to go to my death, but daddy dearest, who was jealous as hell--your mother, Uncle Ed, and Ali don't get that much--well, they were not attorneys, and they did not work for the UMA!  I think, and Paul Revere told me, he had been collecting, since losing his house on 9/11, and being stuck living on $500 per month, stole my $3,000 per month, nice check, but they also made me get Social Security Disability, before I could get my benefits . . . that may be another reason for the switch, to Rachel, or one of the obedient daughters . . . when I got back to the law, October 1, 2009, daddy would have had to give back the $3 grand a month, along with already having substituted a few daughters, who are still holding themselves out as attorneys, whom he loves more--I just consider the source, I don't dig assholes for fathers, con-men, abusers, and money grubbers, who go ape shit, when an alleged terminal ill, daughter, lives and reactivates her law license--that is just not normal, there were reasons . . . Shelley was already me, Kay baby was on the scene, etc., and on and on!  Followers of this blog, know the story, or are getting to know it!

How Did They Know I Returned the Shirt?

I am at the Poverello Homeless Shelter, I don't have access to technology, spy equipment, computer savvy, or the time, nor the interest, to watch their fucking boring lives . . . but they have a billion to 10 billion dollars, mounting daily due to the blog, and prison time, staring them down the mussel of a gun, waiting for them, if they get caught, I am just poor, if I don't catch them . . . I am not as motivated as they are, they are getting the goods, the watch me 24/7 and have constant contact, because there very liberties and freedoms that they don't mind taking from others, are at stake!  They might value them for others, more if they lost them, themselves, but they are the alleged elite, being me, that would put them in that category, but alone, without me they are nothing . . . the best thing about them, is ME!  They have everything to lose, if they are found out . . . I think, they freaked out, just like the charge back and the discovery of the Fuel Fitness charges, that last 5 months after, I failed to ever go in the place, not being the most vigilant, and used to them stealing, therefore, the numbers are off, many times.  I was in Utah, went on plane, a client paid, Kay Reilly, got me to Utah, and I called to check my card balance, and there was a charge for dinner at Jim's Restaurant in Lima, Montana, when I was on the plane to Utah, Vegas first . . . the bus, does stop there, but, I was in the air . . . I called on that, and Kay notified Shelley that I was checking, she has since, gone to the bad side, fucking clients, you did way more for, than they ever deserved or paid for!

I think, they went back a few days, to make it look like I was credited with the money, when it really went on their card with the same numbers, having gotten their government benefits, the week earlier, on January 15th . . . it appears, they went forward, 14 days, to the 29th, looking at my check coming in on the 21st of January, and added 14 days, making it roughly the date I was in Target . . . just a quick fix, but a huge error!  I got paid on the 21st, and returned the shirt on the 4th, so they just, added the 14 days, or two weeks, making it the 29th, instead of the 4th, going two weeks from the date I get the check, the double docketing they did on the court, I get the money, but I am not on the government rolls, is what I think is going on . . . they will make her the original, me the second, probably, framing me for Social Security Fraud, what Shelley or Rachel or Kay, or all of them having stolen from a disabled person!  LOL, smarter then they are!  I am able bodied, and always have been, the poison Shelley concocted, attacked my brain, not my body . . . got my brain back by reading the newspaper, every word, for two years, then got my law license reactivated, fucking up their plans!  Too bad, so sad . . . bye, bye, rock-a-bye!

DO IT BEST . . . THE IRONY OF FATE!  OVER GREED!

I will admit, that these guys are good at theft, having the ability to sit for long periods of time, watching every move I make . . . bringing in people, who have met me at shelters, missions, or on the streets, not leaving one stone unturned, in this game of stolen, mistaken, and theft of identity, and so, fucking much more!  The have an army, and I have me, God, my Intel guy, and may be, just maybe, another, Edward Snowden-like character, who really gives a damn about this level and kind of crime . . . this is not about the $159 at Fuel Fitness, it is about, first stealing my son's music money, that was easy money, take daddy out, get him fired, my mother, kind of revealed the movers behind it, when she said, well, if he had been Mormon, this would not have happened to me . . . Me too, I would assume!  

The music was the motive, then the theft of my identity, Shelley was in deep shit, had warrants out for her ass, and had been in trouble before--nice trade off, work with the cops, to take your sister down, already paid her back for the 9 federal agents and attorneys fired, but we need to get her on the asset forfeiture, she made Utah cops look like the fools and thieves they are, caught red-handed with their hands in the cookie jar . . . so, because she killed our slush fund, we are going to kill her, tried, and take her son's money, as payment in lieu of the asset forfeiture money, she cost us . . . and this thing took wings from there . . . cases, legislation, blogs, speaking, and the chance to have a MORMON PRESIDENT TO RULE THE WORLD!  

Oh, hell yeah, they had all their cards in place!  Running all intelligence arms, the military, saved the financial planners from the big bad securities, but, we are not going to give credit to JoAnn, but Joann--NAME GAMES, the lame ass, dumb bitch, Brett Todd Stuart/Stewart, my 3rd husband was fucking, because I dumped his sorry fucking, sorry ass!  LOL!  Kay was the revenge strategy . . . he had Shelley too, and I would imagine, Rachel and Sue, Brett is like Charles Manson . . . a creative genius, but evil as the day is long, YouTube, God's Revolver, ABG, and you can see Brett, 4 or 5 years after I left him at Elliot's concert, the kid he calls his and Kay Baby's--Isaac was the sub, but, when I started to write my blog and blow GOD'S REVOLVER'S MUSIC  TO MILLIONS, IF NOT BILLIONS OF PEOPLE, THEY HAD TO BRING HIM ON BOARD, ALONG WITH MY OTHER KIDS, TO CARRY THIS FARCE OFF!  Or we will kill your mother, instead!  What would you choose?

HOT, FUN SEX--WILL BE TOMORROW!  THE TARGET MURDER MYSTERY TOOK PRECEDENCE . . . WHILE I WAS ON THE PHONE WITH THE CLERK AT TARGET, MY PHONE, LIKE MY COMPUTER, WAS SUCKED OF ALL ITS ENERGY, AND DIED!  I NEVER CALL ANYONE, AND THE BATTERIES WERE FULLY CHARGED!

P.S., the clerk, said something like, what does my double look like . . . now, I am not sure if that would be Shelley, or Rachel, or it could be Sue, who is in the mix now . . . Kay is too short, I thought, Shelley is the most free, and they will have one in Kalispell, Helena, and Missoula, to cover my ass, as I travel, all over the state, at the drop of a hate, these gals don't move as fast as I do, but they do stall buses, trains and planes for them, to catch up!  LOL!  It sounded like the clerk was looking at surveillance tapes, because, she asked what they looked like.  I thought, if it was Shelley, the most home bound, if she had a wig on, she would look like me, a bit taller, 5'9" or 10", and a little bit thinner; however, my mother told me Shelley had lost about 50 lbs. so she would be quit a bit thinner than myself.  Sue, Rachel and Shelley, are all taller, but wigs have been employed . . . I was wearing my one, utilitarian outfit, black, Poverello hat, with a fish caught on a fly, and it says, ironically and symbolically, DOUBLE HAUL!  5TH annual, a fish fundraiser, hell, these bitches and bastards, probably raised the money for the Pov. reason to side with the Book of Mormon Crowd!

I had black pants, black shoes, white laces, white soles, most likely what I have on now, either a black shirt, with red layered shirt, or red, with black, same shirt, just switch now and then!  A black, Champion brand sweatshirt . . . if it was Kay, she is about 5'4", I am 5'7" and a half, maybe, older, may have shrunk?  LOL!  Don't think so, but you never know!  I hope they catch these fuckers, so sick of having 6 leaches, sucking the blood out of me non-stop, for the last 15 years!  Don't you think it is about time, you arrested their fucking asses?  This should help!  You can at least get them on Social Security Fraud, if nothing else, you can prove this . . . first hand witness, that is why they want me dead!  These witches and warlocks, need to be skinned alive, burned at the stake . . . now would I, if I were one of these women or men, and not myself, sitting right here, at the William J. Jameson Law School, University of Montana . . . might have gotten a grant or two from me!  Through my doubles, nonetheless . . . you can keep the money, just know the source, not the women or woman you think . . . my ass is right here, at 4:08 p.m., 2/11/2015!

You have to remember, I missed almost 10 years of computer technology, while waiting to die, I don't fucking know how do to all the magic . . . these women have the skills the knowledge and the motive--$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$--and the butt-fuckers, the men, all gay, to help them!  LOL!  I wanted a real man, none of them qualified, therefore, they took women, who would let them fist them!  Disgusting!

I may dig sex, but I am not a fucking criminal!  This is a crime, not a popularity contest, not who you think is the cutest, not who you think is the most religious, or who's kids you think should be my son, but the one they all want to claim, in fact they want to claim all of them . . . because, in addition to raising rock stars, female military, model types, and math/legal geniuses, I had it all, the looks, the clothes, the house, the career, and all . . . they want it all from me--got my brain back, will get my body back, and look 20 years younger, than my sisters, Kay, Kelley, to boot!  LOL!  God in addition to be a fucking good Intel man, is also a just God, you are going to get FUCKED!  LOL! 

P.S. to the good agents, the helper bees, they, MIB, MAFIA, MORMONS & MEN IN BLACK, always cover their asses, or mine, since I travel all over the place, at the Poverello, ghost from the past visits, either here, or from Butte, or from Great Falls, Kalispell, are all surfacing, with regularity, to back up the story, that I am not the real attorney, JoAnn S. Secrist, or that she, Shelley, Kay, Rachel, Sue, or whomever, they are putting in my place right now, at this location, they all have cover areas, but Chris, from Butte is at the Pov., as back up, or a second witness, is Joe, kicked out of the Butte Mission, but here in Missoula, his wife told me in Butte, that she, he and another guy, who just dawned on me, is at the Pov., is there two, no wonder he tried to act like he didn't know me . . . Rhonda, whom I met, this fall, or just before the new Poverello opened up, is here, just for a night, and Anne, little farm girl from Ohio, tripped in for just a few hours the other day.  So we have about 5 or 6, who will get paid to lie, and help them with their situation, and fuck me over, just passing through.  I got here before they planned on me getting here, so that fucked them, so they need to cover.  Then I was in the newspaper, last week, story on Homeland Security, but I was in the second page of the article, back a few pages, so they have to get that covered, easy, cops, have been following me around all morning, was going to go to the sheriff's meeting, but the chief of police called the meeting, why at the sheriffs, so they could serve me with bull shit warrants, out of UTAH?

I don't trust them as far as I can throw them . . . Mars . . . .men are from Mars; White House; and Serial . . . all signs I saw today!  God my Intel guy, they are following their dicks, even the President may believe that the one writing this blog, is one of theirs, and I am sure he does, he has never met me, even though, I have helped him with everything from Afghanistan plan to Mitt Romney, they, I am sure, introduced a double, who he is esteeming to be me!  That's about it for today!  SEX tomorrow . . . oh, yeah!   

FUN SEX--LOVE FEST AT THE U OF M--TEACHING HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS, REPRODUCTIVE RIGHTS, ETC. MUSTANG SALLY, YOU BETTER SLOW THAT MUSTANG DOWN! LOL! MEN, WOMEN ARE JUST LIKE YOU, ONLY PRETTIER! WE DIG SEX TOO, AND ARE JUST AS LIKELY TO ENJOY SEX, FIND OTHERS ATTRACTIVE, AND VENTURE INTO UNKNOW FIELDS . . . SONG, ABOUT CHEATING, NEWS, I'VE BEEN CHEATING TOO--NOT HEALTHY SEX, BY ANY STANDARD, JUST WATCH ID NETWORK, ALL THE BIZARRE, TWISTED, COMPLICATED SITUATIONS, LIKE, AH, MURDER, WHEN YOU PLAY UNHEALTHY GAMES WITH SEX. NOW THAT I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION, ON THIS VALENTINE'S DAY SPECIAL, HOPEFULLY, YOU WILL STAY TUNED FOR, DIGGING FOR THE TRUTH, AND READ ABOUT THE GREAT HEIRLOOM, YOU CAN LEAVE YOUR CHILDREN, BETTER THAN MONEY, LAND, GOLD, SILVER, THE DIAMOND YOUR FATHER GAVE YOUR MOTHER, BETTER THAN AN ANTIQUE BED . . . THE GREATEST AMONG THEM IS, A HERITAGE OF, HONESTY, INTEGRITY, CREDIBILITY, AND PROTECTING YOUR GOOD NAME . . . ASK, NEWS ANCHOR, BRIAN WILLIAMS, WHO IS ON THE CARPET, FOR CREDIBILITY, CLAIMING TO HAVE DONE THINGS, BEEN PLACES, AND EXPERIENCED THINGS HE HAS NOT DONE--NOTHING LIKE SHOOTING YOURSELF IN THE GUT! THE BEST WAY TO BE IN SEX AND IN LIFE, IS TOTALLY YOURSELF, 100%, COMPLETELY HONEST--IT REALLY IS THE BEST POLICY!

A Ballroom Full of Condoms?  Costumes?  Plus, Appropriate Dancing!  All True at the U . . . Good for YOU!

I am probably a good person, to write about sex, given the fact, that being raised, a strict Mormon girl, told not to kiss until I was 16 years old, and with the ultimate goal of being a virgin, which I am proud to say I was, there is also a down side to that equation, that of being so prudish, and really ignorant of sex, that I couldn't talk to my own husband, of 10 months, and 9 months pregnant, about a pamphlet on sex, that my younger sister, Sue and her husband, Kevin, got from a gynecologist, as they entered the blissful state of matrimony--they made if through the information fine, and I being big as a house, with our baby, was so embarrassed, that I think we only read about a page or two!  LOL!  It kind of reminds me of my daughter, Greta, and her husband Dallas, not having sex, mostly Greta's idea, the consummate big sister, worried about, their new squeaky bed, on Thanksgiving, afraid, her little brother, wild ass, Elliot, bass guitarist for, God's Revolver, and music major at the University of Utah, has been around--sssssshhhhhhhhhh, don't tell Greta, and his girlfriend, who had been drinking, and having raucous, wild, rowdy sex, in the bedroom below them, and came, laughing, stumbling and falling, into the hall and bathroom, as Dallas, just looked at Greta, and you are protecting him from us, don't you think it ought to be the other way around . . . she, Greta, my oldest daughter, was trained by her mother, and the boys, were trained by their father.  Big difference!  LOL!

On the flip side of my religious training, in this ever, unanswered question, of nurture vs. nature, I have taken, the MMPI, the Michigan, something, Personality, Inventory, or maybe the Michigan, Multi-Personality Inventory!  LOL!  But, I was off the charts, energy wise, and had an ego rating higher than any man, the tester, had ever tested, and had the personality profile of a hooker!  And if I didn't have my religious, upbringing, I would be fucking every man that walked, thus the connection with the song, Mustang Sally . . . it has taken a few husbands to break this mustang in!  LOL!  I had a mother, who was a health and P.E. teacher, and had a very healthy attitude toward sex, with her and my father, having a very healthy sex life, preventing with all 8 children, until she got a hysterectomy!  Some guys, connect sex, and babies, and once the woman, can't have babies, I guess the sex, or the reason, in my father's mind, was over!  They had previously had sex twice a day, for 20 some odd years.  This is called the, Madonna/Whore Syndrome . . . you are either a mother, or a whore, can't be both!  Not healthy thinking.  So, I am a mixed bag of tricks, and you never know, what you are going to get with me.  Some guy, just said to me the other day, at the Poverello, that he didn't think I ever had a good time . . . just because, I conveniently, use my Mormon puritan stance with you, doesn't mean, given the right guy, the right circumstances, and the right atmosphere . . . most luck with me in the mountains, motels and hotels, no, and I could never have sex on my anniversary, because it was expected, as it is by going to a motel or hotel, same with giving me a negligee, my comment to my husband--who's body have you been looking at for 12 years? . . . I hate commitment, feeling coerced, or having to do anything, even if it is sex with my husband, on our anniversary, that I feel trapped, or manipulated into doing--weird psychology, at best, but that is me--spontaneity works best!

Personal Evolution of Sex

I figured the Birds & the Bees, out on my own.  But, semen, hell no, what in the hell is all this sticky stuff?  I thought, on my honeymoon, if I ever had sex, before I was married, I sure as hell, would not have had it twice!  My friend told her new husband, that she was more turned on by a kiss!  He retorted, if I knew you were this fat, I would never have married you . . . this came in between the marriage ceremony, and the reception, where they were not talking to each other.  Surprise, surprise, surprise, we both ended up divorced!  And argument for pre-marital sex, or sex education?  I was the first person, to get married, out of all my sisters and friends, who were virgins, Shelley, was already married, and I think, was not a virgin, or most likely, so I didn't bother to ask her about sex or misinformation about sex.  One of my friends had a co-worker, who had just been married.  I told, Lynette, to ask her how many times she had sex on her wedding night, and like what did they do . . . I had only figured out the missionary style, and oral sex was a mystery, my Mormon bishop at BYU threw me out of his office, when he asked me, because I was too embarrassed, to tell him what I had done, in my freshman confession, what oral sex was, when he asked if I had ever done it.  

Now, this one co-worker, unbeknown to me, and her experimental, and most likely, much more experienced than myself, said they had sex, 7 times the first night, and they eat each other out, using a banana, and whip cream!  Are you kidding me, well, that one is out, but, the 7 times, okay, that is average, I guess?  So, as shy, reticent, and bashful as I was, having not seen a male body, since, my younger brother was about 2, I was a bit, shocked, to say the least, and wished that I had a tennis viser that I could wear upside down, as my now, husband, strutted his stuff all over the room, even playing the guitar, nurture for Elliot, while I was avoiding the inevitable, SEX!  A bit grossed out, by the first encounter, I wondered why we were not having sex again.  So, I said, it that it?  And he said, What do you think I am, a marathon man?  LOL!

I WILL BE GLAD TO BUY YOU A MONEY FOR CHRISTMAS

Okay, so my husband, had been somewhat more adventuresome in his teens, being inactive and thrown out of the American Boy Scouts, for swearing at winter camp, and he, when brave enough to broach the subject, would ask me if we could have oral sex.  The Mormon Church at the time frowned on it; therefore, I was sure that it was not something we should do, and you do go to the bathroom, from that part of your body, and that just didn't sit well with me.  I did take an anthropology class in college, and there was this professor who had a pet monkey, who would give him blow jobs, as he came out of the shower, and I would be amenable to getting him a pet monkey!  I don't think he thought at was all that funny, but I did!  LOL!  At least it was a compromise!  I did, once, out in our VW van, decide after being married about 10 years, that I might as well try it, just this once, and surprise him, since we were being spontaneous, and at least having sex in the van . . . frankly, I was turned on for a week, but I never did it again.  

Breaking the commandments of sex, even while married, was bad enough, but I at least owed him that . . . never looked at it, that I could also enjoy, that sexual experience, both giving and receiving, out of my menu of beliefs.  Although, the scriptures and God, are more liberal than we are, and he said, husbands and wife's should come together often, and the marriage bed is undefiled!  I am sure he would limit that to the catch all phrase, as long as it is done in love, and both partners are okay with it.  Just my opinion.

Over all, I dig and dug sex, probably more than my husband did, because I was off the charts energy level wise, and in that same MMPI, he took, he was below the charts on the other extreme, no energy, he was working full time, stressful, city planning job, and big time church calling. I on the other hand was running every morning and a bored housewife--he strongly encouraged me to go to school or college to finish my degree, to get some of that energy out, I am sure!  LOL!  I always wanted more than I got, let's put it that way, so a husband's dream come true, in that respect, I have never, turned down sex, with someone, I love, and feel safe with, never, and most likely never will, unless in the testing stage of a relationships, trust is the ultimate element of any healthy relationship, and gets you more sex, better sex, and more frequent sex . . . got to have trust, or no go!

The First Time I Had FUN SEX!

I started to date a trust-funder, if you know what that is, someone, who's parents, support, and they have endless time, to have fun, have sex, go to dinner, take drives, golf, play basketball, and racquetball, plus ditch out on the 6 kids, we both had between us.  He had a great house for getting rid of all the kids, huge, on 3 1/2 acres, a pond, two sides to the house, and tons of yard, hide-outs, and rooms, closets, and whatever to ditch into.  We met dancing at Park City, Utah, and hit off a fun, wild, crazy, playful, great relationship, and both with the energy to boot.  We had always been conflicted over sex, although, we were going at it all the time, doing everything but . . . and that is fun too, the anticipation of sex, is sometimes, what makes the whole thing fun, don't be too hasty, you miss some good, frustrating energy, and wanting each other so bad, you can't think of anything else, way cool and fun!  We messed around for two years, touching, feeling, goofing around, teasing, and whatever.  Until, I hit the bar exam, to become a lawyer!  Stress, stress and more stress!

Here is where the healthy parenting comes in . . . my mother had always said, sex helps me calm down when I am stressed, picks me up when I am depressed, and makes me feel good, we are talking, loving, mutually respectful sex, knowing my parents!  So, Jerry, my lover at the time, had gone to Ohio, to visit family, while I was staying at his house to study for the bar.  He told me, that he really wasn't having that much fun, missed me, and I told him, I needed him to come home and have sex with me, because I was so stressed and the words of my mother, came to mind, and God could just forgive me and him, but I fucking needed to have sex, and get the release it gives, and I was about 39 and he was 47, so we were both adults and had been dating for two years at this point, so what the hell.  He gladly came home that night, as I recall, put the kids and himself, on the plane, with no explanation of why they were jetting back to Utah, but he was on a mission, to help me in anyway he could, get through the bar exam!  LOL! 

The second we were alone, we had sex.  He said, both of us out of practice, and not really knowing each other's bodies, well, that sucked, let's try it again.  And like riding a bike, after the 8th time, the last on the washing machine, we had it down, and it was great, from that point forward.  Don't think for one second, that you know, what you are doing with a new partner, or spouse, because, I am here to tell you, when the Bible, says, and he knew her, they are talking carnal knowledge, and each body is different, angles, energy, preferences, and what is an is not agreeable.  To trust and feel comfortable with a spouse, or new lover, you have to take some time, to communicate with each other . . . the movies, are selling you a bill of goods, with both people, rushing to the hotel room, ripping each others' clothes off, for the hottest sex, every time  . . . sometimes that may happen, but don't give up, if he or she doesn't rock your world the first time you have sex . . . I firmly believe, you have to love that person first, then trust each other, that you are not going to be with someone else the next night, or his/her exploits are going around campus, then, hopefully, after getting to know each other first, and going another level, or when married, I can't tell you what anticipation does, waiting can make the heart grow stronger, and believe me, men, woman get blue balls in their stomachs!

In the Chicken Coop, While On the Phone with Church Members, At What We Thought to Our Surprise, Was a Remote, Deserted-Like Island--Caught, Butt Up in the Air!  LOL!

After I went cruising into the bar exam, and was so relaxed, people wondered what the big smile on my face was, and at that point, after great, fun sex, for a week or so, I didn't even care if I passed the bar exam or failed.  Smile, hell, yes, it is that powerful, and great, fun as hell, especially with a partner, you completely trust, who has your best interest at heart, and is doing all he can to help you reach your dreams!  LOL!  He was getting his, and so was, I.  After I took the bar exam, I told him thanks for the service, now we need to go back to no sex, due to our beliefs--his response, fuck NO! You can't just use me, have me take care of you while you take the bar exam, and then cut me off!  Oh, yeah, watch me!  LOL!  Na . . . I liked it as much as he did, like cutting off my nose to spite my face!  Forever conflicted over our alleged value system, not really, free abandoned sex at that point, and fun, fun, fun!

The funniest time, we had fun sex, was, we were just going for a drive, which we always did.  We were west of Salt Lake City, and going toward Wendover.  He had his hand down my blouse, feeling me out, and going nuts, driving, not knowing what he was going to do, the blue balls thing, I could see, I was so turned on.  So we made an executive decision, and took a detour, out on this road, that we thought, led to nowhere, leaving us free to do whatever, wherever, and we did, to our chagrin, as we planted our asses, mine, in particular, in the Great Salt Lake sand, in a roadside, ditch, with water down lower, and Jerry, with his butt up in the air, going at it, when cars going by, honking, looking, and us, laughing, being too far into it, to care too much, but laughing our asses off!  I am very modest, but I didn't give a rat's ass, and was more bugged at the drivers, for interrupting, really energized, fun, electric, and hot sex!  Shame on them!  Fun, fun, fun, should be!

This is going to be, serial, sex education about having fun sex, love, and a healthy relationships!  To be continued . . . two more husbands to go through and a few lovers . . . get back to you later, or tomorrow!  Have a great Tuesday!  Gotta go catch a bus, lunch!        

BRAIN'S ON BROADWAY--TWO BARKING SISTER'S DOG SPA & SPA BUDDIES, ABOUT FOUR, LOL!--CYBER BULLYING, EXTRA-FACTUAL FACTUAL INFORMATION . . . QUESTIONS, QUESTIONS, QUESTIONS, CONNECTING DOTS, FILLING IN GAPS, MAKING ASSUMPTIONS, BASED ON THE FACTS, EVIDENCE, EXAMPLES, STATISTICS, AND OBVIOUS POSSIBILITIES . . . NSA, GETTING UP, AND ON BOARD! AMAZING--HOPEFULLY, BOTH NATIONAL AND STATE LEGISLATURES WILL GET ON THESE BULLIES, THAT I HAVE BEEN WRITING ABOUT FOR 6 YEARS NOW, LONG BEFORE EDWARD SNOWDEN RATTED OUT THE NSA . . . LONG TIME BATTLES TO GET SOME JUSTICE ON SISTER/EX-FRIEND, TEAMING WITH COP ENTITIES TO EITHER MAKE ME DISAPPEAR, OR STEAL THE GOOD STUFF FOR THEMSELVES, BECAUSE, EVERYTING IS MORE PALPABLE, EVEN CRITISIZING COPS, WHEN IT COMES FROM WOMEN THEY CAN CONTROL; HOWEVER, FROM ME, OH, EVEN IF THEY DIG THE WORK, THEY ARE JEALOUS AND TAKE, OR ALLOW ACCESS FOR THE GIRLZ!. SIMPLEY JUVENILE AT BEST, DOWNRIGHT INFANTILE AT WORST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND THEY GENERALLY, OPERATE AT THE WORST LEVEL! ARISTOTLE, VIRTUE OF HAPPINESS, CAN'T TELL UNTIL A MAN DIES; TED KENNEDY'S LAST 20 YEARS, WONDERFUL FATHER, UNCLE, GRANDFATHER, STEP-FATHER, AND SENATOR; IT'S JUST A LITTLE CRUSH--JAMES KENNEDY--DRAG ME TO CHURCH, LIKE A DOG IN THE STREETS; I'M SUCH A FOOL FOR YOU; HAPPINESS; EVERYTHINGS GOING TO BE ALL RIGHT, ROCK-A-BYE, JESUS, IN YOUR NAME; JESUS, IN YOUR NAME . . . HEAVEN AND EARTH COLLIDE, YOU ARE THE SAVIOR OF EVERYONE! HAVE A GREAT WEEK!

Say What You Need To Say, Eventhough Your Heart is Broken!

 

I can tell the NSA--forgive me for my spelling, not a spelling bee winner, ever--is on, because, once they tune in the loony toons, they start fucking with the normal operations of the computer, my blog, and basically, writing good stuff about the, puported way of life, and all of the sudden, I can't just type, put in punctuation, spell check, spacing is blocked, the cursor, all of the sudden, goes up to the title, so it appears, that you are going to write over the title, and that may very well be, due to the access, they are allowing the bitches in heat, to get to my blog, so they can feret out any offensive information, that would reveal the fact, they they are not in fact, me!  They, the NSA, government, or the Mormon faction of the NSA, which is about 30,000 spies, just outside of Salt Lake City, Utah, where the Mormon Church headquarters are, making sure that there is nothing that reflects poorly on the Mormon Church, with 30,000 watchers in cyber space to protect, the 70% of the CIA, FBI or higher, and about 100% of the cyber spies, the ones who have access, or give it to the two sister's barking, that I am the liar, rather than them!  LOL!  HA! 

 

I am sure that these girlz, whom I know, far to well, to respect any of them for any aspect of their lives, other than their determination, to become a part of me, either from stealing, or taking credit, including for this blog, they just simply, through bribes, pay hospital staff, bus drivers, Poverello staff, and about any one who comes in contact with me, to state, that I am other than I am, eventhough, surveillance at the Pov is readily available, and easy to be accessed by federal cops, who should be on the case, given that this whole thing started in Utah, and has followed me to Montana, with a huge number of Mormons, the association, needed to promote this underground racketeering, money laundering, and patterns of criminal behavior.  There must be an association by which, all the persons, act, interact, connect, deal, scheme, and promote the criminal acts, to have a RICO action, that should be so, easily recognizable by the feds, and U.S. attorneys, having used it against, mob members, like John Goitti, and others . . . but, many mob snitches, are buried in the Mormon Church, because, nobody expects the two to mix . . . they do all the time!

Why Would My Heart Be Broken?

First of all, that people, whom I grew up with, had as sisters, friends, lovers, husbands, in the earlier years, would stoop so low as to lie for, well, I guess, I am the expection, for monetary and political gain, using me, whom they critisized, for going to law school, letting beautiful daughers go in the military, working, taking or saying, "yes" to all the job opportunities, that were offered and extended to me, with my mother, saying changing divisions, or jobs, showed instability, being flighty, or lacking the tenacity to stick with a job . . . nothing could be further from the truth!  I got a new job, handed to me, almost every day to the day, January 1, of each year!  And these were not you, average ordinary jobs, these were top jobs in the state, and also teaching positions within, reputable colleges and universities.  In those positions, I would rip-it-up-tear-it-up, like nobodies business, eating, sleeping, mastering the position, until the task, thinking of myself, as a firefighter, in a way, putting out fires, around the state, organizing, coordinating, crystalizing objectives, and what not, often setting up a new position, that Congress just appropriated money for, like being staff attorney, for the Division of Aging, where nobody, knew exactly how to coordinate senior centers, with government areas on aging, league of towns and cities, county governments, systems that dealt with scams and fraud, in addition to the local law enforcement agencies, dealing with elder abuse and exploitation.

 

Rather than, celebrate at the service, the creative and tenatious skills, that I employed, to help many people, especially, the people who had been, abused, exploited, hurt, or injured in some way, and being glad, that my particular skills, of writing, as an undergrad, English major, with a communications, minor, plus teaching credentials, to help with presentations, lobbying, working with explanations, getting points across, and making other people understand what the agencies, I worked for goals, aspirations, and end results, would be, or the desired outcomes, the jealousy, even hatred, envy, and whatever, sinister plots, from poison, to death, came into their depraved and criminal minds, coupled with their alleged, allegiance to the Mormon Church, which was basically, little to none, unless, they were personally being helped, like Shelley, through the welfare system, taking some of the burden of the family, for the welfare family.  Hell, Shelley, Rachel and Kay, were no scholars, not even seminary graduates, from the high school religous programs, and Shelley and Kay, either didn't make it through the temple ceremonies, or walked out, Rachel was a bit better.  In area, after area, of life, from mothering, to education, to contributions, to award, to scholarship, I was above & beyond all of them . . . these are just the facts; I never even mentioned many of the awards and honors, I got, because, they came as, just doing my job! 

 

The honors, accolades, and awards, were simply, a result of taking my job serious, and doing the best I could, and then being recognized by others, for the good work I did . . . I generally, was so into the next job, or project, that I rarely even attended awards, ceremonies, or in the case of my award winning, Domestic Violence & Sexual Assault Manual, for cops and prosecutors, I let the co-author or writer, who did about 25% of the prosecutor's issues, with me writing the grant, designing the manual, telling her, Kristine Knowlton, how we were going to do everything, or the brains behind the manual, and then writing the cops part . . . at the time we got an award from President Clinton, I was working in administration at the Utah Attorney Generals Office, desiging, 7 times the programs, videos, presentations, and setting up a library in the Capitol, for the 1800 volunteers, that I had trained to take the messege to the people of the state of Utah, benefiting, everyone, as fast as possible . . . I was just too damned busy, to stop what I was working on to go to Washington, D.C., to get an award!

 

Everything is as Cool as it Can Be, In a Peaceful World

In a peaceful world, one that is cool, credit goes where credit is deserved, the person who actually did the feet, is the one, who is either honored, or disgraced by the performance they do, whether fat, or thin, black or white, male or female, Jew or gentile, and so forth and so on.  That is just the way things work.  As I entered the Learning Center, at St. Patrick Hospital . . . through symbolic representation, on the TV or computer screen, there was a picture of two, Monarch butterflies, the symbol, for the CIA program, I think, this theft of a life, a career, a family, a blog, cases, even a whole person, always, just wanting to bring about change for the better, leave their footprint, make their mark, and contribute, to a more peaceful and better world, is fraught with doubles, lies, coverups, bribes, twins, corruption, brain washing, wigs, body padding, or whatever, dumb ass thing, they use to make them, the girlz, look, act, be, present themselves and me!  How, truly sad, that the good, is substitued for the fraudulent, and somehow, nobody seems to care, nobody is willing to tell, or speak out against this travesty of justice, this blaring and abberant breach of truth!  The scriptures, something these men, well boyz, and women, or better said, girlz, the mean girlz are awarded for total, bull shit, lies, and acting the part, rather than being the part.

 

I can't see anything cool, about stealing someone's identity, rather than creating your own, legacy, taking credit for the things you did, and if necessary, change what you are doing, and fix it.  I love, the Aristolian, essay, on Virtue wherein, Aristotle, uses the example of a man's life, and how can we tell that he was happy or not, and at what point, is this fact, either apparent, or readily available for other humans to determine.  He held the position, that you can never judge a man, either happy or unhappy, until the day he dies, then, you might be able to make an educated guess.  Why?  Because many people, who had rough backgrounds, or a rough patch is the way the people in the Poverello Homeless Shelther, put it, or at one point, in someone's life, they may have trials, and later, in life, figure out what is causing them and change.

Senator Ted Kennedy . . . A Great Example of a Life Changed

I guess, he is on my mind, because, first, I love the Kennedy brothers, President John F. Kennedy and United States Attorney General, Robert Kennedy, and Joe Kennedy, the older brother who died in serving his country.  Teddy, is what I would call a late bloomer.  He had his issues with alcohol, with women, the Chappequetic death of an alleged pregnant woman, also, either an affair, behind Joan's back, or a mistress of some sort.  Anyway, a lot of people, only thought that his name protected him, and maybe it did, but I am sure that is not the first time in history, a famous name, helped a family member.  But, when Senator Kennedy was 62 years old, he met and married a female attorney, a good lot, so I understand why sisters/friends, would want to be in that class of women . . . but everything seemed to change, as I could see, as accounts, at his funeral, at 84, if believe, started to roll off family member's mouths!

 

So, basically, 20 years before his death, he hooked up with this woman, divorced, herself, with two sons, and when the two, like magic, got together, Teddy's life started to change, and at the funeral, there was speculation, now the other two didn't live, long enough for us to see what happened, but that he, of all the Kennedy brothers, was actually the most influential and made the most difference for the American people, through his politics, his ability to work with the other side of the isle, and to push through, what would be considered, a liberal agenda, that the Kennedy family, and Democrats in general are know to promote, always, siding with the minority, the oppressed, the abused, the down right, poor side of society, with parent's, Rose and Joe Kennedy, pushing their entire clan to do good, to work for people, generally in government, and promote the good of those in society without a voice . . . that is what the Kennedy's were about, with all their money, etc. 

 

Carolyn Kennedy, got up at here Uncle's funeral, and said, that he stepped up to the plate in his later years, and took over, being the parent, or standing in their shoes, for all of his children and his brother's children too, about 27 of them, if I remember correctly, and he never missed a college graduation, a wedding, a baby's blessing or baptism, and every summer, he gather the Kennedy kids, of his dead brothers, and took them on some, American, historical trip or vacation, and told the family, cousins, kids and all, about the founding fathers, about the stories and people, that made this country great, carrying on the tradition of the Kennedy patriarch and matriarch, a noble and wonderful family encouragement and contributions, with all serving, roles to better society, as seen in Jack and Bobby, taking on government and the mob, simulaneously to work with Cuba, restore the gold and silver standard to back our currency, reigning the CIA, and doing all the unpopular things a president should do, regardless of poll numbers and popular opinion, just doing what is right!  Bobby was doing more to take down the mob, stop criminal behaviors, racketeering, money laundering and cleaning up the streets of major cities, than any other, either before him or after, getting rid of 15 mob members . . . or going after them!

PEOPLE FALL IN LOVE IN MYSTERIOUS WAYS

Many of you who have followed this blog, through good, bad and ugly, know that around Christmas, or shortly thereafter, James Kennedy, one of the original, or so he claims, 51 boy cousins of the famed, Kennedy family, came tripping into the Butte Rescue Mission, and as fate, or the FBI Dating Game would have it, before I knew, he was a Kennedy, my intimate patterns in love and marriage must have kicked in, and I immediately, looked down at my ring finger and panic, looking for my wedding ring?  Bizarre in and of itself, due to the fact, that I could hardly keep one on, for my whole life, a symbol of the old ball and chain to me, freedom is everything, so, Mr. Kennedy's reaction on me, was somewhat, horrifying, shocking to my senses, and a bit of a mystery.

 

How, do we fall in love?  Who, knows?  But, often, there is a grand conspiracy, as some country songs would suggest, with God, being somewhat involved, or in the mind of an 10 year old, who was commenting on dating and marriage, said, he is all knowing and the rest of us, later get to find out who we are stuck with!  LOL!  But, once, James told me his name and family heritage, not sure, how far removed, or removed at all, since he told me that, John Jr. never really died, and he was the kid in the videos of President Kennedy's funeral procession, saluting his father on his 3 birthday, making the boy, about 53, to may recollections and poor math.  But, one time, I asked him what year he was born in, and he seemed confused, and said, in 1961, which could have easily put him in the right age to be going on three, when his father who was killed, late November, 1963, with the funeral plans, probably put off for a while, so people could come to the Capitol Rotunda, to pay their respects, before he was laid to rest in, Arlington Cematery, or wherever.  Conspiracy central here . . . from one account, one chair was ejected from the plane, John Jr. and Carolyn, her sister too, were flying in, wrecked just off Martha's Vineyard, near his mother's home?

YOU KNOW I AM SUCH A FOOL FOR YOU

Whether, this is James or John, doesn't matter to me, what mattered, was the way I felt with him, I felt love . . . now, he could have read my blogs, that I wrote about the 50th anniversary of Kennedy's death, actually, I wrote both in 2013 and 2014, I kept getting all these YouTube recommendations, with the Kennedy Assassination stuff, coming up, without even writing my blog on it, the normal mover and shaker behind the YouTube gods, mysterious as that all is.  Did he know, that I was the one, who fought, tried to figure out the conspiracy of the brother's deaths, who was behind them, another Jim Garrison, so to say, the district attorney, who tried a guy, and came up with many who might have been involved in the assassination of the President.  My reaction to him, definitely fits, former lovers and husband, biker, bad boy, wild man, outdoors man, etc.  So, the intimate patterns, plus my adoration for the Kennedy's, not necessarily for their personal lives, in fact, that was a mark against him . . . some men are better memories, the first words, I almost said to him!  LOL!

 

After we got through the scammy stuff, the pick up lines, that are like dead fish in the water to me, I have heard them all, we got down, more to the real people, the man and the woman, and that is when things started to click, at least for me, and it seemed for him.  I love the country song, I must be doing something right . . . a touch of a hand, whatever, can make a woman love a man, the little things, I think.  James would always, wait for me, pretending like he was busy . . . shovelling the snow, or helping with the bread, or just smoking a cigarette, timing it just right when he knew, I was coming down the stairs from the women's dorm, or going to the mess hall, or leaving for the library to type my blog for the day . . . he was almost boy-like, someone with a crush, way cool.  I saw this t-shirt, yesterday, as I was finishing my 6 mile journey to and from Fresh Life Church, while taking a rest at McDonald's, and it said, while I was thinking about James, Talk Less, Fuck More . . . that about sums up, what I think life would be with him, which is just fine with me--he is not much of a conversationalist, once the hit lines are over!  LOL!  He acted shell-shocked, each time I asked him a question.  He claims to have been raised on a farm in Kansas, so, cowboys and farmers, are not known, generally for their conversations . . . fits that characteristic, at least.

 

But, every night, we had to read scriptures at the Butte Rescue Mission, or some church pastor came and preached to us, and that became my favorite part of the day, because, James, either getting there before me to eat, or me, being there before him, we always, sat by each other, if he could go without a cigarette long enough, but, he would always, pull my chair a little closer to his, so we could share the same Bible, and look at the verses together.  He, would try to find the books in the Bible, and did better than I thought, but he would usually, give it to me, and I could find them.  He told, me once he spent a year in jail, and read the Bible 8 times, because he didn't have anything else to do, DUI.  Sometimes jail, is not so bad, for obvious reasons, plus, he stayed sober, because he had to blow at the mission, to make sure nobody had been drinking, number one way to get kicked out!  LOL!  All good stuff!  On a rare occasion when I could get him to talk, I asked him if he went to church when he was younger . . . Oh, yeah, his mother was a strict, Penticostil--sorry, NSA turned spell check off, and he always had to go to church . . . I love his mother.  Most guys and gals, are really, like they were in high school, if they were religious then, they will be later on in life, and James didn't balk at all at the scripture study and it gave us a chance to sit close to each other . . . I loved it!  Made me want to be married!  LOL!

Take Me To Church, Like A Dog in the Street

As, I was down in the Chinese laundry, sweat shop, in the basement of the Poverello Palace, this was the title of the first song, or just a lyric, but I was anticipating going to church and also, this song made me think of James, and many, who are either wanting to return to their religious roots as children, or who have never even heard the good news of the gospel of Jesus Christ.  The song was cool, but I had never heard it before, so I missed some of the lyrics, but in one part, it referred to a female, and that being the only person, he believed in, and believed, she was the one to spread the truth, about church, or maybe God.  A year ago, December, I felt impressed that I should, stop writing so much about politics and write more about Jesus Christ, our savior.  And it was during the conflict in Kiev, between the separatists and the Ukrainians, and Kiev was burning, and Russia was breathing down the necks of the Ukrainans to take back, or get Crimean.  My heart went out to these people, as it doesn't in all countries who are steeped in war, their children, the lives shattered, the battles, that never seem to end, and I put a scripture, it is from Romans, the book in the New Testament, and it talks about the fact, that nothing will separate us from the love of Christ, not death, earthquakes, war, famine, etc.  My blog got 30,000,000, yes, that is million hits . . . back when the actual numbers, before the split, burying, etc.  But that is how hungry people are for this information, some, never having ever even hearing of Christ, a savior, and a redeemer!

 

People longing for the truth, kind of like I think James was, at least, he didn't ever complain, and seemed to be the driving force, behind me coming to the table and hearing the word, because one night, I stopped and got something to eat, late in the afternoon, so I wasn't too hungry at dinner, so I gave up my seat, that was not near James, for some reason, he probably came in late, and sat where there was room, but, I gave up my seat, to the person, so they had a chair in the crowded mess hall, and went to the back of the room, where James was sitting . . . NICE!  And he told me to come up and sit by him, I declined, and said that I had already eaten, and he grabbed a chair, pulled it up next to him and told me to get something to eat, which, was cool, in and of itself, most me, given my weight, would have encouraged me to not eat, so another endearing part of what made, me dig him.  But, he insisted that I come up and share, not only the food of that night, but the food and water of life with him, Jesus Christ, he seemed to hunger and thirst after the word, like the Beatitudes, say we are suppose to do, hunger and thirst after righteousness . . . he seemed to be doing that, and rather than discourage me from attending the worship services each night, he encouraged it, and really did seem to have a grasp of the scriptures, either from his mother, or jail!  LOL!  I'll take it either way!

Clap Along, If Happiness is the Truth . . .

All of these are titles from songs that came on before church yesterday, and just wrote them down, thinking I could use them in my blog.  A cool connnections, and I am not sure that this is the song, or the artist, who just got an award, at the music awards, not much of a TV watcher, but the song, HAPPY, got some award, last night.  I guess, Smith's, don't know who they are, got the best album and song, but, anyway, the artist or musician who wrote and performed the song, got an award.  Here is what I wrote down, because, I describes so much the way I feel, after going to church or reading the scriptures, I can be pissed off to, because, God's ways are not our ways, but I have yet to mature enough to do stuff, like forgive people, obviously, and other challenges the scriptures try to give us, to truly make us, HAPPY . . . Clap along, if that's what you want to do, Clap along if happiness is the truth . . . give me back, if that's all you got.  Because I'm happy, because I'm happy, because, I'm happy, happy, happy . . .

Everything's Going to Be Alright, Rock-a-Bye 



 



FLURRY OF LOVE--TO RUSSIA, THE UKRAINE, GERMANY & FRANCE, WITH LOVE . . . KEEP THOSE PEACE TALKS AND CEASE FIRE GOING! GERMAN CHANCELLOR MERKEL, AND FRENCH PRESIDENT, HOLLANDE, ARE USING ALL THEIR POWER WITH DIRECT VISITS TO KIEV AND TO MOSCOW YESTERDAY, TO STOP THE BLOODSHED ASAP AND TO KEEP TALKS FOR PEACE, UP-N-SMOKIN WITH THE FIRES FOR LIFE! YAHOO! CHANCELLOR ANGELA, CHALK ONE UP FOR THE WOMAN'S CLUB, SAID, WE ARE CONVINCED THAT THERE'S NO MILITARY SOLUTION TO THIS CONFLICT, AND SHE REFUSED TO BE BOXED IN ON TERRITORIAL ISSUES, STATING THAT SHE WOULD NEVER DEAL WITH TERRITORIAL QUESTIONS OVER ANOTHER COUNTRY--U.S. VICE PRESIDENT, JOE BIDEN, QUESTIONED PUTIN'S WILLINGNESS TO SEEK PEACE--CALLING THE KETTLE BLACK, DON'T YOU THINK, SINCE WE ARE NOW FIGHTING IN ABOUT 5 OTHER COUNTRIES THAT WE KNOW OF! THAT IS PROBABLY JUST THE SHORT LIST! EMPLOYMENT GROWTH IN U.S., IS CLEARLY ON FIRE--JANUARY JOB GROWTH SHOWS U.S. RECOVERY GAINING GREATHER STRENTH--EVEN LITTLE BONNER, MONTANA, COMPANY, BUT WITH BIG PLANS, COULD BE BRINGING ABOUT 400 JOBS TO THE AREA, MAKING BONNER AN INPORT OR INLANDER OPERATIONS, PURCHASING STORAGE UNITS, TO HELP WITH THE PROPOSED OPERATION, STORING TIMBER AND OTHER PRODUCTS, THAT WILL THEN BE SENT TO OCEAN PORTS, FOR EXPORTING--TO MY BEST RECOLLECTION, RAILROADS, GET ON BOARD WITH THEM, THEY NEED YOUR HELP, LIKE A RELAY RACE, BUT A GREAT IDEA! SO THINGS ARE LOOKING UP ALL OVER THE WORLD, AND GOOD FOR JORDAN, FOR QUESTIONING AND DEMANDING PROOF, THAT AN AMERICAN FEMALE, RELIEF WORKER, NAMED MUELLER, WAS ACTUALLY KILLED BY JORDANIAN AIR STRIKES, AGAIN, THAT KNARLY WORD, "PURPORTED" CROPS UP, LEAVING US TO QUESTION THE MOTIVES AND THE TRUTH OF THE ALLEGATIONS . . . DON'T LET, EXTRA-FACTUAL FACTUAL INFORMATION CREATE AN ATMOSPHERE OF FEAR, ANGER, AND GET US INTO GREATER CONFLICTS, THAN ARE NECESSARY, WE WILL NOT BE PLAYED FOR THE FOOLS! NOT ANY MORE . . .

The Magic of Love!

 

NSA just tooned in, loonie toons, maybe they can sure up the Canadian loonie; Canadians, have to spend $135 to Americans, spending $100--this is due to the oil glut in America right now, and we want the Keystone XL Pipeline, sounds like Canada, doesn't need it either, we will sell them our oil!  LOL!  I know that Kalispell and surrounding areas, love the Canadians, because they come 3 hours across the border, to shop in Kali, and they love them so much, they fly both the American and the Canadian flags, the good neighbor policy, or the one world order starting?  Sorry, it pisses me off, that I am going to write about a small time, local, Missoulian boy, and my conversation, about he and his wife, who are separated at the time, so he just stopped by the Poverello Homeless Palace, to get a great meal, and believe, me they are so good!  Now, I want to remind you, that, I am not a guest at the Pov, but a resident, and just finished my 3 hour stint, as the Chinese laundress, extraordinaire, in the dungeon, sweat shop!  Sorry, stream of conscience writing again, get distracted, by the NSA! 

 

I had a wonderful mushroom burger, the other day, over across from the University of Montana, at the funky, college, hang-out, perfect for the college atmosphere, with Internet, and a large screen TV, where I was lucky enough to time the announcement on the purported month old burning, of the Jordanian pilot, and the interview with Rear Adm. Kirby, along with getting to hear the statement made by the King of Jordan, who was visiting with President Obama, and the alarmist, alleged ISIS special reporters, who seemed to make the alleged killing as horrendous as they could, making for mass hysteria, in Jordan, and a call for revenge and blood, which is exactly what the storytellers want to happen!  But the Cyberdine Cafe, is worth visiting and eating at . . . my kind of place, Rainbow Gathering Family kind of place, like someone like me, a former professor at three colleges, might take my four kids, when they were younger, to imprint, the flavor of college lives in their fertile minds!  Amazing burger, and the fries were to die for too!  And it was worth the $10, burger, fries and drink, a cut above, Carl's Jr., but so good, mushrooms and brown gravy and cheese or whatever was on it, dripping, mouth watering good, onto my plate! 

 

But the next day, I decided, my budget was shot, as it usually is by this time, and I went to the Poverello Palace--thanks Missoula--for lunch, and we had a burger, just a patty, dripping with Swiss or provellone cheese, avocados, mushrooms, and onions, dripping off, and that was just the entre', we had fresh fruit, a bowl of assorted fruit and strawberries to boot, green salad, with homemade salad dressing, soup, cheesy potatoes, roll, etc.  Every time, I eat there, I wonder, why I ever bother go to out to eat and pay.  I am always glad when some chef, either gets fired, quits, or is in transition between towns and drops in whatever shelter, mission, or palace, I am staying in, between apartments and travel . . . great food, even when the stores have to throw it out, because the expiration date is approaching, the food is still good, and recycled food, is as good as recycled news!  LOL!

 

However, the Cyberdine is always worth it . . . I have eaten there on several occasions, love it!  Militarized vehicles aside, funky, professor and college type students, like my children, hang at these types of places!  Now, for what I was going to write about, when I was so rudely, well, happens every day, interrupted by the NSA cyber-games.  Love . . .

There is Magic, Just in the Mention of the Word--Valentine's Day is Coming

So, this quite, handsome, 43 year old, drops by the Pov, and you generally get familiar, or know the familiar faces, his was not a face I recognized, always wonder about undercover, but, I am a friendly lass, and he blurted out, that he was worried about seeing several girls at some AA meeting, he was going too.  I questioned him, the natural interrogator, especially, when it comes to issues of the heart, they say, those who can't do teach, I was going to be a marriage and family therapist, until I learned that you had to sit back and listen, and wait until the person comes to their own conclusions, on how fucked up they really are!  I am much better at barely listening, and then giving out advice, like attorneys do!  LOL!  Careers that fit!  Eventually, he fessed up that he was separated from his wife . . . oh, really, and who are these three woman?  LOL!

 

He went on to tell me, that him and his wife had been married for almost 25 years, had two kids, and she had issues with his drinking, and lack of a job, as of the first of January, at this point, I am definitely on her side!  There are those issues that you can deal with, and then there are deal breakers, those two fall into the later category!  The good news is, neither one of them or fatal, and the person can do something about it.  He told me that she had lost all this weight, and refused to divorce him yet.  That is a good sign.  Then he got to the point, where he confessed, that he thought, she still loved him, and I said, that sounds like it.  Maybe if she can have some time to get her shit together, and he gets his together, they can get back together.  I also told him, that 90% of divorced people, say, that if they had it all to do over again, they would stay married to their first spouse and work things out!  I told him, that Valentine's Day is coming, don't commit to a date, or anything, just surprise her and drop off, a surprise gift, not too much, to commemorate the love, that at least once shared.

WHEN LOVE WALKED IN, TEMPTATION LEFT 

Slowly, he got much more silent and just listened, as I rambled on about love, romance, what women want, and what men want, that there are always people with better bodies, to temp us away from our spouse, girlfriend or boyfriend, but that door swings both ways, just because you were the first one out that door, doesn't mean, she or he can't go t here too.  None of us, are completely great, perfect looking, nor wonderful all the time, employed, sober, cool, funny . . . we are simply human!  Finally, I got my pay for the conversation, he said, thanks so much, it has been very helpful to talk to a woman, not one he is sexually interested in nominating as his next prey or victim, for sexual conquest, and just really appreciated the time, the talk, and the advice.  

 

He left it with, you have given me a lot to think about.  I told him about a great movie, and oldie, but goodie, not a block buster, a sleeper, really, but it is about love, men and women, a guy with an alcohol problem, and the issue of sex or waiting until marriage to have it.  By the end, I was crying! The movie, is called, My Name is Sara(h) . . . she joins AA, because she see him, love grows, marriage comes, and they are both the better for doing the dance of dating, not just jumping into marriage or sex, but playing the mating game . . . you see it in nature, and we are part of the food chain, do the game, even though you hate it, because, you will be forced to do it at one time or another!

Love, Love, Love . . . That's All We Really Need!