ONE SWEET THRILL . . . JAMES KENNEDY, GOLD COIN--ANGEL, SUN RAYS, CLOUDS, GRAND FUNK RAILROAD, DURANGO & SILVERTON RAILROAD HISTORIC TRAIN . . . MARK FARNER, BAD TIME TO BE IN LOVE, LIVE 2011, OR IN MY CASE, 2015--JAMES & MARK, BOTH FIT OLDER GUYS, BODIES REMIND ME OF EACH OTHER, NECK--LOVED TO SMELL JAMES' COLON! UP CLOSE & PERSONAL! CHECK VIDEO, YOUTUBE! LOL! I WAS GOING TO RECYCLE, MSNBC, RACHEL MADDOW'S, "OUTRAGE-O-METER" LISTING VARIOUS NEWS ITEMS THAT MAKE YOU GO FROM PISSED TO OUTRAGED, AND HAVING SIGNED ALL MY VENTING & PISSED OFF EMAILS, JOANN S. SECRIST, J.D., "ATTORNEY FOR THE OUTRAGED", WITH EMAILS GOING TO 10,000, UNTIL I STARTED MY BLOG, 9/21/13, GOING TO BILLIONS DAILY ON 5 SEARCH ENGINES, AT LEAST 4 VERSIONS, I DECIDED TO PISSED NOT TO COMMENT--GO FIGURE, RACHEL LISTING: (1) THE OIL SPILL ON THE BEACH IN SANTA BARBARA, CALIFORNIA, WITH VOLUNTEERS DOING THE CLEAN-UP, KNOWING THE COMPANY RESPONSIBLE FOR THE PIPELINE SPILL, WOULD TAKE MONTHS TO CLEAN IT, EXPOSING THEM TO CHEMICAL AND OTHER HEALTH RISKS; OR (2) THE PARENTS OF SLAIN GIRL, IN THE THEATER SHOOTING DURING THE SHOWING OF "BATMAN, THE DARK KNIGHT", IN AURORA, COLORADO, SUING THE ONLINE GUN & AMMO SELLERS, WHO SOLD TO THE SHOOTER, IS NOW ORDERED TO PAY A QUARTER OF A MILLION DOLLARS IN LEGAL FEES, FOR THE GUN & AMMO MANUFACTURER, FOR LOSING THE LAWSUIT, UNLIKE ANY OTHER TYPE LAW SUIT, UNLESS IT IS A FRIVOLOUS SUIT; OR (3) THE VERMONT LEGISLATOR, WHO IS KNOWN TO HAVE AT LEAST 6 WOMEN LIVING ON HIS FARM, WHO HE RAPED, SEXUALLY ASSAULTED, AND TRADED RENT FOR SEX, PIMPING THEM OUT TO OTHER MEN, FOR EXTRA PAY, AND HE IS STILL SITTING AS A CURRENT STATE LEGISLATOR!; OR (4) THE TWO CLEVELAND COPS, THE GRAND JURY FAILED TO CHARGE OR INDICT, FOR THE SHOOTING OF 12 YEAR OLD RICE, WHO HAD A TOY GUN AT A PARK, WITH THE CALLER TO DISPATCH TELLING THE COPS SHOP, THE GUN WAS BELIEVED TO BE "FAKE", AND FOR KILLING A BLACK WOMAN, TACKLED TO THE GROUND & HANDCUFFED, BEING MISTAKEN FOR THE PERSON WHO PARKED A CAR ILLEGALLY BLOCKING THE DEAD WOMAN'S DRIVE WAY, BLOCKING THE OWNER, THE WOMAN THE COPS KILLED IN THE TAKE DOWN! NOW COPS ARE SAYING SHE IS MENTALLY ILL! REALLY? SHE CALLED FOR ASSISTANCE, THOUGHT SHE SAW THE TWO PERSONS WHO ILLEGALLY PARKED! BOTH COPS HAD BEEN FOUND UNFIT FOR POLICE WORK BY OTHER DEPARTMENTS; OR (5) THE DUPONT CORPORATION, WORTH $60 BILLION, WITH NO SAFETY REGULATIONS OR POLICIES, ONLY BEING ORDERED TO PAY $99,000, FOR 4 PEOPLE WHO DIED IN A CHEMICAL LEAK AT THE DUPONT PLANT! AND WE WONDER WHY CORPORATIONS HAVE PERSONHOOD STATUS AFTER CITIZENS UNITED CASE . . . BECAUSE WE ARE NOW JUST COGS IN THE CORPORATE MACHINE, LOST PERSONHOOD STATUS! AND THE LIST COULD GO ON AND ON . . . BUT MY THOUGHTS, HAVE TAKEN A DETOUR, GOING FROM THE NEWS, AND WRITING ABOUT THE ANATOMY OF A SERIAL KILLER, AND THE NSA, WHO IS FAILING TO PROTECT ME AND HELPING MO'S WITH 30,000 CYBER SPIES, IN UTAH, HEADQUARTERS FOR THE MORMON CHURCH, WORKING FOR MORMON INTERESTS, AND MONEY, FROM MY BLOG, BEING PAID BY AMERICAN TAX PAYERS, WITH A BUDGET OF $80 BILLION DOLLARS, TO DO WHAT?, WATCH MY BLOG 24/7 TO STEAL TITLES--3X THIS MORNING!, ENTIRE BLOGS, AND MONEY? YANK FUNDS, AT LEAST FROM THE UTAH, NSA! SELF-INTERESTS!

If You Are Lost, Go Back To Where You Can Be Found!

You know, that someone is special to me, when I am willing to give up writing about the news, politics, serial killers, with the questions of why, how, who, and what creates a serial killer, or slamming the NSA, whom I hate with a passion, having seen a documentary of them, the joke being that the NSA, which stands for the National Security Agency, coming to mean, No Security Agency, because people really didn't know much about them, until, Edward Snowden, ratted out the super cyber spy agency, more reliable than the human frailties of agents, who can be bribed, trapped by honey's, or killed, passing valuable security information, ah, don't be fooled that the cyber spies are not subject to the same frailties, and are helping the Mormon Cause against me, rather than the American Cause, which I am all about!

The last words, James Kennedy spoke to me, were, why don't you go to Durango?  He told me he was leaving soon, and he had kicked off his big black boot, that guarded and protected his foot, that had been either shot by a drive-by shooter, with cops saying, it could not have been a drive by shooting, because they would have had 10 more . . . not if it was a mafia warning! . . . or the result of a bad slip and fall, and he trashed his crutches, and was packing up his 150 pound, tramp camp, that he carries around . . . is it any wonder, he is totally fit?  And he walks all over the place, and did even with a broken leg, and crutches . . . fucking crazy! Birds of a feather . . . LOL!  But, as I have said before, I told James I was going to Bozeman, because of a job, and needed to wait to see what happened, there?  I was also concerned about the new surveillance camera, picking up what we were talking about, so, being one who, unlike Kennedy, tries to error on the side of safety, I refrained from committing to meeting him there, or saying I was going there.

The next morning, I thought the whole thing out, and realized, that the job would take about a month and a half to get a call, and this was March, the job didn't start until June 1, 2015, and love was more important, fighting back my responsible side, that hadn't been rearing its ugly head for a while, used to be a workaholic, several times during my life . . . seeing that my life's goals were beauty, adventure and excitement, James was much more in line with those goals, and much more enjoyable, than some boring ass job, in Bozeman, Montana, as much as I love colleges, the thoughts of getting a van and traveling, appeal to me much more, seeing I had a companion with similar views, in fact, suggested it, being the goal I originally had, three years ago, before cops stole my truck, while going back to Utah to get provisions, and pack up my shit, and later, having my car, blown up with a pipe bomb, taking seriously, the state motto, Get Lost In MONTANA!

Now, I Am Just LOST!  I Don't Know Where James Is?  So?

Rather than going to tell James, that I was leaving, I got up the next morning, thinking I would avoid any complications, with surveillance, staff, nosy roommates, questions, and watchful eyes of staff, that new damned well, we had a thing for each other, and me worried about being set up and getting James killed or something worse that the leg,  the need for discretion, safety and covert operations were necessary, with the NSA, continually on my cell phone and computer, and the eyes of the government all over, including at the bus station where be had both hung out, off and on, I had to be extremely careful, not wanting to detect any attention that might connect me and Kennedy, with the Kennedy curse, looming large on my mind, Born to Die!  So, I got up at 5:00 a.m., the next morning, and walked to the bus station, and purchased tickets to Durango, to surprise James, by just showing up, without notice, sure I could find him . . . Ha!  That morning, I got poisoned, guess I was under the Kennedy curse, any association was merit for killing . . . and after eating at the diner across the street, barely could walk across the street, knowing full well that I could make the trip to Durango, and coughed up orange chemicals, indicative of the poisoning, and throwing up all over the bus station bathroom, with the attendant, seeing the drastic change, he was going to refund my non-refundable ticket . . . purchased one to Missoula, then Kalispell, to get somewhere someone would miss me if I died, which I was sure I was going to!  Started slamming Diet Cokes, to saturate and diminish the effects of poison!  I spent 5 days in the Super 8 Hotel, in Kalispell, too sick to call anyone, and too sick by the time I hit, Kali, to even walk across the street to the Zip Trip and get a Diet Coke, good there was a vending machine in the Hotel . . . it took me three weeks to get fully back to operating speed, and hitting Durango two weeks after James would have been there!  He would tramp camp, it was warmer then than now! LOL!

How Do Two Tramps Hook UP?  He Doesn't Carry a Cell Phone, Which Makes Sense . . . He Is Out of Service, Doesn't Know How to Use One!  My Kind of Guy, NSA, FUCK YOU!

Now, I didn't let my sons get into Boy Scouts, because I was afraid that they would get molested by their Scout Leader, but sisters, Shelley and Rachel, got their boys, Tyrone Southwick and Matthew Hickey, to be Eagle Scouts, and I picked up a few tips, either through them, or at girl's camp when I was young, or more likely from the movie, Blair Witch Project!  LOL!  From what I understand, the best thing to do, when you get lost, is to go back to the place, you were last seen by someone you know, and hope they come back to that exact spot and maybe they will find you there!  So, that is why I am back here in Durango, not to mention that I had the Montana Posse after me!  LOL!  Josy the Outlaw . . . really, a political enemy, qualifies me, in Utah and Montana!  Crossing former governor, Sweitzer, on the Keystone Pipeline, current Gov. Bullock and Attorney General, Tim Fox, on the Salish-Kootenai Water Compact, shockingly unconstitutional, with two attorneys, having sworn to uphold, not to mention, their elected offices oaths, and pushing legislatures nationwide to man-handle cops, controlling the out of control, cop shootings, and the bad effects of the Patriot Act, along with some other local issues.

So, I figured that if I was ever going to see James again, it would most likely be in Durango, which is I am sure, why they, the FBI, alleged, health, safety and cleanliness inspectors I ratted out the other day, are back, covering up, with acting like they are making sure that everyone is doing great . . . why weren't they here when I was here a month ago, and almost here, at McD's daily?  Truth makes reason stare!  LOL!  I told him my food was great, and there was another undercover, worker spy, who sat by me for hours, not working, just acting like he was on a 3 hour break!  LOL!  I get up too early for the FBI to fool this gal! LOL!  Fun, fun, in funky town, Durango!  So, that is my rational, at least wanting to see him at some time, or at least hoping he reads this blog, or hears about it, both so he can understand, why I left a second time, without telling him, being pretty pissed and hurt the second time I left without a word, with method to my madness!  Both of us picked a bad time to be in love . . . and I only speak for myself, he  probably has a hot biker bitch taking my place!  He is too hot to last, and I knew that!  Durango it is, fuck the job! LOL!

Phenomena or Pheromone Perfume, Gold Coin, Angel . . . Me or His Nick-Name, Known as a Righteous Biker Dude! 

James gave me some perfume, I think the brand was Pheromone, you know that scent that attracts the opposite sex, allegedly from animals, to draw suitors, oh, yeah, so great, good choice, but I left it in Helena, when I had to book it out of there, leaving all my make-up and the perfume . . . would have gone back for it, just because it came from James, and people asked me all the time, what it was, probably from his scent, LOL!  I was sick, that I didn't have it, screammmmmmmm!  I used to love, to get up close to him, after his showers, and his hair was still wet, and I could smell the fresh scent of his cologne, yummmy, nice . . . I remember one time, he was in the laundry doing his washing, and I went in after him, to get some privacy from the eyes that were all over us, whenever we were close to each other, and NICK was the worst, he had to be paid by the government to keep us apart, because, this particular time, I had been somewhere, and seized the opportunity, to steal, some one on one time, with James, walked in, while he was checking his laundry, not knowing that NICK was right behind me, when I walked up to him, sunk my nose into his neck, which, I get wet thinking about, even right now . . . seeing, Mark Farner, of Grand Funk Railroad, singing, Bad Time 2011 Live, which I had to watch 20 times, this morning, lyrics reminding it of James, tears, because he reminds me, especially of James' neck, definitely, his strong neck and body size and shape, energy, some of his face, age wise, but with way cooler hair, long too, wild, curly, dark, some grey, generally pulled back in a pony tail, with curls everywhere, once he left it wild, and wild it was!  Taking the relationship slow, a Kennedy, I couldn't help, but, reach out and touch one of his curls, not wanting him to notice, being early in the whatever it was, relationship.  Always wanting to touch him more, and more of him!  LOL!

Right as I reached my arm around the back of James, so I could smell him, that damned, NICK, came in and interrupted us, with some lame ass statement to interfere with everything, and James, getting kind of pissed, with this little pest, and then, killing the moment, and putting him back in the mindset to get his laundry done!  Nick was always in the middle of us, always, bringing attention to us, and being the go between, and who knows if he wasn't purposefully messing with the message!  The perfect little spy, he was allegedly from Italy, a rich family, and born in the Ukraine, adopted by his Italian parents, or was he mob?  He was smart, and looked, perhaps, younger than he actually was, wanted to be with me 24/7, to the point I was ready to kill him, he was bugging the hell out of me, and especially when I wanted to be next to JAMES!  It is funny, every one could see the connection, between us, and would comment on it, while there were other couples, who tried to make every one think they were a hot item, fucking each other in the storage rooms, the kitchen and fighting in front of every one . . . James and I tried to downplay whatever was going on, but you can't hide love!  I was probably better at it than he was, until I left the first time, and he was hurt, and more cautious . . . I am always careful, wondering if it is an agent, is he married, a cad, whatever, too good to be true . . . kind of like the FBI, who just showed up at McD's, making me leave the joint, not trusting him; he is one of the agents who showed up the other day . . . regional managers, like the two agents were trying to be, don't show up, and ask all the people if they are getting what they need, then going in and cooking or preparing food?  No, this guy is a new addition to the crew . . . they forget, I have been here for almost a month before, and now almost a week, now.

James, Was Like a School Boy in Many Ways . . . Out of the Blue, He Gave Me a Gold Coin, or Token, or Symbol of His Nick-Name, But I Still Have It!

James loves music, and always had some device, to play music, but one time he needed some ear plugs . . . the NSA, had just fried my computer, up in Missoula, before coming to Butte, and that is what I used my ear-buds for, so I had what he needed, and didn't need the earplugs anymore, so I gave them to him, so he had some way of listening to his music, until he bought a new electronic device, and larger earphones, kind of like the old fashioned ones, but larger and probably better sounds.  I always had to compete with his music to talk to him!  LOL!  I would start to talk to him, and get blank stares, until I grabbed his earphones and had to stop the music, to talk to him!  LOL!  But he was always cool to make sure I had Diet Coke money, which I was very grateful, to him for.  But one day, he just came over, or gave me the gold coin, as we ate breakfast, lunch or dinner together, which we always did, or when we had pastors from the local pastors, and we shared scriptures together, and James always pulled me close to share his book with me, because at times, I was late, being at the library and pushing time, right up to the minute, missing dinner sometimes, and he gave me the coin.  I was not sure what to do with it, but I liked it, because, it was unique, different, and the woman, with wings, the angel on the coin, had sun rays, behind the woman, and she was walking on clouds, and the coin was about the size of a new dollar coin . . . memories keep holding me . . . Grand Funk song, I am listening to, and straight up, right spot on!

At the time, I didn't think much of the golden coin, just thought it was a nice gesture, and I liked anything from him, and just dropped it in my purse pocket, and didn't think much about it, until recently, when no matter what I am doing, that coin, either falls out of my zipper pocket, or I grab it when I am looking for change for the bus, or for lunch, and I always smile when I see it!  Once . . . I am getting God, Intel, to zip this up, or they will track me, where I am . . . left McD's, where agents were, and caught the bus to the library, better zip this, or they will yank it!  I think as the NSA, stole my titles, three times in a row, they probably think I gave up!  But, connecting the dots, Durango, the Durango to Silverton Trains, reconnected me to the Grand Funk Railroad Music, with Farner looking like James in a lot of ways, and having to hunt for change, for the bus, always, always, always, catching a handful with James' gold coin, and later learning that one of his nick-names, or maybe a given name, Angel, connecting me to him, through the angel on the coin, or maybe, but not likely, I remind him of an angel!  LOL!  Probably not after leaving him twice, without knowing why!  Sorry!  It was more out of concern, safety, and I wanted to surprise you, but I was the one who got the surprise . . . you were long gone, or maybe you changed your mind, and never came to Durango!  Grand Funk, is singing, Yellow River . . . and I remember a girl that I knew . . . Yellow River, is in my mind, in my eyes, is in my blood, the place I love!

James, Smile, James . . . Memories Keep Holding Me!

JoAnn S. Secrist, J.D., Attorney For the OUTRAGED!  No one can go from zero to bitch faster . . . the difference between a terrorist and JoAnn; you can negotiate with a terrorist!  LOL!  Warning, statements made about me by friend, Scott Holyoack, Parowan, Utah!  Hey, Scott!

P.S., if James is a cop, undercover, he will have to say he is in love with Rachel, because she is the cops, fill in for me, and is nicer, and they can negotiate with her, LOL!  Like I said, if the cops, don't get with the program, constitutionally speaking, I will never negotiate, and there will never be peace between, the bad ass con law chick . . . better get the big boob bitty and she will negotiate, and she is nicer, for sure! Flight attendants tend to be nicer people than ATTORNEYS!  LOL!  But, what can I expect from cops, with bodies like apes, and the brains the size of walnuts!  LOL!  I always have the hope that James is different, but that will remain to be seen!  Do what you have to, it is not worth dying over . . . getting shot in the ankle was enough, they don't play fair!  Like is attracted to like, and you have the boyz club to satisfy, and they love to love women like Rachel, dumb enough to get plastic surgery to make a man happy, but not smart enough to keep his interest, if he has to talk or spend much time with . . . you can always, hunt, fish, golf, or go to the tavern with buddies for intellectual stimulation, she can probably, do the sex, but remember, the brain is the largest sex organ, fuck the dumb clucks, can't deal with stupid, and anyone choosing Rachel, T & A, over a terrorist, is crazy, even if they are a COP!  LOL!

YOU GOD-DAMN MOTHERFUCKERS . . . DO YOU SERIOUSLY THINK THERE ARE NOT SPIES ON SPIES? THERE ARE MORE NSA, FUCKERS THAN THE 30,000, USEFUL IDIOTS IN UTAH, DUMB SHITS! BAD ASS CON LAW CHICK BLOG IS ON AT LEAST 5 SEARCH ENGINES, UNDER AT LEAST 4 TO 5 LITTLE CHANGES IN THE NAME . . . $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$, AND THE NSA, CAN'T STOP THEM? BECAUSE THEY ARE THE PROBLEMS, AIDING & ABETTING THE THIEVES, COME ON? I KNOW THERE IS A SPY, RIGHT HERE LOOKING AT ME AT MCDONALD'S RIGHT NOW, HE CAN TESTIFY THAT I AM HERE WRITING THIS BLOG, THE ONLY ONE WRITING ALL VERSIONS, AND THE ONLY ONE WHO DESERVES A FUCKING DIME! STOP THESE FUCKING CRIMINALS, WHO WORK FOR THE GOVERNMENT! AND WE ARE PAYING $80 BILLION FOR THIS? TO STEAL MY BLOGS, DAILY!

BUTT-FUCKING FAGGOTS, MAGGOTS, IN THE NSA, JUST ERASED MY TITLE . . . DON'T MESS WITH AMERICA: AMERICAN WASTE DISPOSAL . . . PATRIOT ACT, SUNSETS INTO FLAMES, COPS DON'T GET TO BE JUDGE, JURY, & EXECUTIONERS ON STREETS ANYMORE, BALL & CHAINS OF DUE PROCESS & EQUAL PROTECTION, OTHER BILL OF RIGHTS BACK BIG TIME! I GUESS NSA, DECIDED THEY WOULD ERASE MY BLOG TITLE A FEW MORE TIMES BEFORE THEIR FUCKIN' LAW GOES OUT OF BUSINESS AT THE END OF THE MONTH, A VICTORY FOR ALL AMERICANS! I FOUGHT THE LAW, AND I WON . . . THEY WON A FEW BATTLES, BUT I WON THE WAR, HATE THE GOD-DAMNED PATRIOT ACT, AND ALL THE BUSHIES WHO SUPPORTED IT! I LIVED TO SEE IT DOWNED! YOU DIDN'T STOP ME, YOU ASSHOLES, 24/7 SURVEILLANCE FAILED . . . IF GOD IS WITH ME, WHO CAN BE AGAINST ME--NO ONE! NOT EVEN A CORRUPT FEDERAL GOVERNMENT, USING THE LONG ARM OF THE LAW, STRETCHING FROM MONTANA TO DURANGO! COWBOY COPS IN UTAH AND MONTANA DIDN'T SUCCEED IN STOPPING THE QUEEN OF FREEDOM, SO THEY TRIED TO INDUCT THE USE AND SUPPORT OF LOCAL, POLICE, SHERIFFS, AND FBI (MO'S IN DISGUISE) LOL! ROLLING STONES SINGING, CAN'T GET NO SATISFACTION . . . DOMESTIC PEACE WILL COME WITH THIS DOMESTIC WARRIOR, A 20 YEAR VET, WHEN COPS, PROSECUTOR, JUDGES, CONGRESS, LEGISLATURES, LOCAL, STATE AND NATIONAL LEADERS GET BACK TO THE BASIC OF THE UNITED STATES CONSTITUTION, WITH LIBERTY, JUSTICE, EQUALITY FOR ALL!

The Mask, UFO Abduction In Snowflake, AZ, Starring James Garner, Montana Cop? . . . Super Powers For Inferiors

Last night, at the Volunteers of America, Durango Community Shelter, where I came for political, constitutional and justice asylum, we watched two movies, The Mask, and one with James Garner, a Montana cop, going down to Snowflake, Arizona, to investigate, an alleged abduction, true story, of a local boy, with several others as witnesses, who were accused of his murder, and with the end of the movie, with Garner, having James, tell local law enforcement or the sheriff, that he will come down from Montana, personally when these boys broke and they messed . . . leaving me wondering what the hell, cowboy cop with a black hat, evil, was doing out of his jurisdiction or power area, in another state, I missed the first of the movie, so I missed why he would be there, but the symbolism didn't miss me, since, I might be experiencing the unconstitutional long arm of the law . . . Montana cops, or former cops pissed they didn't get a piece of my ass while I was back in the state for the last month!  LOL!

I left Montana, as a result of a bunch of fucking cop/legislator, directed, cops, in Montana, which has been Utahized, under the auspice of leadership, by Frank Garner, who is, scary, scary, scary, the director of security at the Kalispell Regional Medical Center, with no more authority than the Mall Cop, lol, with one chick, and four other cops or goons, under his direction, who couldn't even find me in one fucking building, for three hours, while I was waiting for the Golden Triangle Transit, that picks people up at the hospital, and whisks them off to Glacier Park, and beyond, to safety, from the Montana, morphing into Utah, police state, and me, being, legitimately on hospital premises, for lunch, later, to get the fuck out of illegal cop actions, aimed at doing whatever, if these fuckers, think they are going to cite me with trespass, which is a fucking joke, just like they are real cops, lol, they would have to call local cops, if they even wanted to, or could be stupid enough to cite me with anything, knowing full well, that they are going to have to go up against a U.S. Supreme Court Bar member, and bad ass con law chick, against your local prosecutors, with jury in tow, that pesky 6th amendment, damn-it! . . . I guess you could do what Utah did, bring in special prosecutors, regional assistant attorney generals, who were on electronic devices, taking tips and hints, arguments, during court, to handle me in court . . . bring it on, dip shits, you have no fucking authority to do jack!  

Someone better inform, Frank Garner, he isn't the chief of police anymore, and can't act like the asshole, I am sure he was as a cop, and I met him, just after he was made director of the all powerful security--lol at the hospital, and an asshole he was, and probably is as a legislator . . . and I would guess a Mormon! LOL!  A member of Mitt's, Mormon Mafia! LOL!  They are enemies to the United States Constitution and me, a con law attorney!  Big time!  Warning to the cops, police today, and yesterday, trolling for me, with the FBI coming into McDonald's playing the part of McDonald's supervisors, checking on the cleanliness of McDonald's . . . way over acted boys!  So, as I leave the fast food joint, and crossed over to the bus terminal, to wait for the buses, the black and whites, were trolling the parking lots, and this morning, black a whites again, were trolling the parking lots behind the fire station, at exactly the time I would have been walking through, had I not stopped to enjoy the mountain and river, in place of smelling the roses . . . but you can smell the Rose's force of cops, not doing official cop business, harassing citizens, really? This is the work of Shelley and crew!  I would fire the fuckers for doing Mormon shit, being paid by tax payers in Durango!  Do, what you want, it is your money!

Non-Attorneys, Putting on My Mask!  Super Powers They Don't Have!

It was cool, the other day, while I was on the Kalispell, city bus, the Eagle Transit, two students, got on the bus, right after taking finals, and one said to the other, bad ass . . . yeah, bad ass!  And, of course my ears perked up, due to the title of my blog, and wondered, if they had been reading the blog, and as of late, and always, making the statement, that there is no short cut to success, as if these two students, who were commiserating with each other over a test, and being beat up a bit, it sounded, kind of resigned themselves to the fact, that whether they like it or not, what I say in my blog it true . . . you don't cheat yourselves to success!  Jim Carry, in the movie, The Mask, is a no name, scared of his own shadow, bank worker, who accidentally finds an ancient mask, and putting it on, he is secure with the women, can put his boss in his place, and do magical, powerful things, that he could never do, or had the guts to do, without the mask, until later he realizes, that these traits of honor, bravery and action, were inside him all the way along.

There is another, Jim Carry movie, called, Yes, Man . . . again in this movie, Jim is a similar character, won't go out, has no luck with the women, and is in a loser job, until one day, if I remember, the story line, someone challenges him to say yes to everything for the next few days, he does and his life starts to transform, and he is successful, a man women love, and he has a rebirth.  Now, I want to make a point with both movies, because they make some great points . . . first, the CIA, Monarch project, that took 6 very average women, and put my mask on them, giving them powers they never had before, transforming average attorneys, flight attendants, biologists, EMTs and history majors, into BAD ASS CON LAW CHICKS, with my credentials, resume, cases, blogs, legislation . . . I am sure improving their lives and standing, much like the bank tellers, life was changed by the mask! 

 The thing, that the CIA, and whomever, hatched this asinine plan, forgot to remember, that, this bad ass con law chick, whether standing in the courts of the land, including the U.S. Supreme Court, or writing a blog, really didn't need a mask, ever, relying fully on her own merits and climb, to success, without putting on something that she didn't earn . . . and they got their asses kicked, as did their female assets, who could stand a chance in hell of being successful in any debate, challenge, writing contest, or whatever, since, there were no short cuts, no cheating, no male dip shits, making up for my deficiencies, or doing the work that the gals allegedly did, or fucking old bastards, like my father, and his two brothers, or NSA hackers, giving Shelley and Kay access to my blogs, emails, thus letting them control my work, and still couldn't contain the FIRED, STAR POWER of someone who paid the price, not only in her profession, but in her personal life . . . you can't exchange life experience, even thought they could steal the other things, they could not give them what these college students were smart enough to realize, that they had to take the tests, go through the agony, do the papers, the quizzes and class assignments to be all they wanted to be, no matter how miserable it was!

One of the arguments, against cloning, for doubles of famous and contributing persons, is that, even if they have the exact same DNA, and molecular make up, they will never be able to recreate the same life experiences, the nature and nurture of what made this person who they are, with their reaction to life's challenges being unique, given the time, date, and place, that things happened in their lives.  So, if they think, that Kay, an attorney, even a BYU grad, knowing all the professors, and administration, but 15 years my senior in the law, she can't replicate, what made, or makes me, ME!  She may be close, but she will never, never, ever, ever, replace me and the 5 statewide jobs, the fight with the cops and prosecutors, get the experience of the three colleges, that I taught at, supervise 13 staff, oversee 3 statewide programs, and oversee 1800 volunteers; she can't write the briefs for the Brock and Cheek cases, or argue the points, like someone, who walked right into enemy territory in Cedar City, and demand, phones and other evidence back that was illegally taken by cops, in the county or region headquarters of Homeland Security and the Narcotics Task Force, with signs on the doors, stating, personnel only or employees only, given the element of surprise, putting narc cops on the defense, rather than the offense, throwing them off their game!

I don't how many resources the CIA, FBI, Mormons, the connections, the access of the NSA, these bitches, just simply can't be me, will never be able to emulate the attitudes, they are beggars, in a princess mask!  Like it or not, cops, I have changed the landscape of law enforcement, in America, and you can't tell the truth of history, using fucking fake ass bitches, no matter who many of you have fucked them or think they have nice tits, or that they are nicer than I am . . . damn right, they are not warriors!  I FUCKING AM!  Lick your fucking wounds, just like I do . . . peace will come when, YOU, get your fucking, shockingly, unconstitutional asses back in the right playing field, giving Americans their rights, freedoms, liberties, and all that good stuff, we should be on the same fucking page!

As Far As I Know . . . YOU ASSHOLES Took the SAME OATH I TOOK, WE SHOULD BE Allies, Not Enemies!

DON'T FUCKING MESS WITH AMERICA!

HOT SHOT 1, UNDESIRABLES . . . LAW ABIDING CITIZEN: SIN'S A GOOD MAN/WOMAN'S BROTHER OR SISTER . . . JUSTICE AT ANY PRICE; OUT TO GET YOU; DON'T LET THEM TAKE YOUR GUN(S)! HOOKED ON LOVE; LOVE IS STRONGER THAN FEAR . . . THERE AIN'T NO REASON FOR A GIRL TO LEAVE ME: AIN'T GOT ANYONE SINCE YOU LEFT ME . . . A GIRL THAT IS HARD TO REPLACE! JOB THUNDER! GOD BLESS THE AMERICAN SOLDIER, VETS, THOSE WHO HAVE FOUGHT FOR FREEDOM BOTH ON DOMESTIC & FOREIGN SOIL! FREEDOM IS NOT FREE! HOME OF THE FREE BECAUSE OF THE BRAVE! A FREE SOCIETY TAKES AN ACTIVE CITIZENRY! SO GET INVOLVED . . . JOIN THE FREEDOM FIGHT, FOUGHT EVERY DAY! WHETHER YOU KNOW IT OR NOT! BELIEVE ME, IT IS NOT FREE! CONTINUAL FREEDOM DEMANDS A PRICE, BUT IT IS WORTH IT! HAVE A GREAT MEMORIAL DAY . . . A SAFE ONE TOO!

When it comes to arrogance, power, and lack of accountability, journalists are probably the only people on the planet who make lawyers look good.

Steve Brill

Undesirables . . . Those Who Threaten the Constitution, Defense and Security

This statement by Vladamir Putin, President of Russia, struck me yesterday, while reading the newspaper, like a ton of bricks, especially, in light of the timing, for America, Memorial Day, and what happened in Congress, or the Senate, letting parts of the Patriot Act, sunset, or failing to have enough votes to let the Act continue, thank God!  Especially, Section 215, allowing NSA, or the National Security Agency, to spy on American citizens, taking away their 1st, 2nd, 4th, 5th, 6th, 8th, 9th, and 14th amendment rights, to some extent, depending on how it was used against people, like me!  But, I thought, how pertinent this statement in the title, just above is, with President Putin, recognizing, the paramount interest, in having a set of laws that govern the people and the government, in the form of a national Constitution, and how that come into play, in both defending the country, dictating the rules of engagement on foreign soil, and in matters of state, with a huge effect on security, and preservation of a way of life, that people, within a particular country have come to, not only expect, but to demand, with the right to do it, seeing that the primary role of government is to defend the rights of its people, and to protect from foreign invasion and war.

Somehow, in passing and furthering the Patriot Act, Americans, forgot about the first ingredient in Putin's formula, for running Russia, that of prosecuting people and groups that threaten the Constitution!  President Bush, his goons, Cheney, and members of law enforcement making up the executive branch of the government, come to have the idea, that there were no constitutional rights for citizens, that by way of the smiling fascist, doing whatever it takes, with no limits and no exceptions, in allegedly taking care of American business, both foreign and domestic, in light of defense and security, they could completely destroy, diminish, erase, eviscerate, demonize, thrash and trash, anyone, who did what we all took an oath to do, defend, protect and preserve the United States Constitution, as if that had nothing to do with national security or defense of this country, and all that we, as Americans hold near and dear to our way of living here in these, United States!  

In addition to myself, coming under scrutiny, for ah, being a constitutional law attorney bound and determined to uphold my oath as an attorney, I became sadly aware of others, including police chiefs, who started to make their officers carry around copies of the U.S. Constitution in their squad cars, who were later, fired, mistreated, persecuted, injured, who lost jobs, houses, and other property, being subject to thefts, of real, personal, and intellectual property, simply for doing what our alleged enemy did, go up against those who would threaten our constitutional rights and freedoms, and failing to prosecute those who threaten the Constitution!  And isn't it ironic that Edward Snowden, who ratted out the NSA, and their unconstitutional activities, finds comfort and solace in RUSSIA!  Shame on America, these fucking assholes, who trashed and went after people who were trying to save the Constitution, freedom, rights, and protections for citizens, were the ones prosecuted, persecuted, and some killed!  Don't forget, America, our fallen soldiers, who fought on this soil, against our own government, and lost lives!  But for the grace of God, go I!

Law Abiding Citizen: Sin's a Good Woman's Sister, Protected!

I don't know if the people of Durango, know that less than a month ago, I literally, after being poisoned, coughing up orange crystals and barfing my guts, up, after a diner in Butte, Montana, went up to Kalispell, to die, so someone would at least know me, after three years of being chased, for exactly what I have just written about, and no member of the executive branch, or the law enforcement agencies, seem at all concerned about a constitutional law attorney, who is actually engaged in the same business as they are, enforcing the law, but the Supreme Law of the Land, against law enforcement and members of branches of government, who are UNDESIRABLES, for failing to uphold their constitutional duties, responsibilities, and violating laws, rights, and civil rights, under federal statutory and constitutional rights, while acting under color of law!

I dare any member of the law enforcement community, to search my records, and see what it was like prior to 2000, when I was poisoned, or allegedly got a genetic brain disease, and was told I would die, would never work again, wishful thinking, since I had long been known for fighting against unconstitutional acts of undesirables working within the government ranks and files!  I had perfect credit, a perfect driving record, without a blemish of any kind, and a flawless legal resume, work background, and on top of that, not just three, certificates of good standing from the Utah State Supreme Court, but four, due to the United States Supreme Court, clerks, ah, yeah, losing the one that accompanied my oath and affirmation of protecting, defending and preserving the United States Constitution, which marked a turning point in my life, going from the perfect citizen, the law abiding citizen, being swapped for the sins of the sister, whom the UNDESIRABLES, shielded and protected, and gave her my record up to that point in life, and gave me her shit life . . . full of warrants, bills, charges, etc.!

You fucking, undesirables, teamed with sister, family, bad attorneys, clients, cops, elected officials, members of the hierarchy of the Mormon Church, including a presidential candidate, to defraud, threaten, and try to kill, me, the law abiding citizen, attorney, defending the Constitution against you fuckers, and then you failed to do anything to protect me, my property, my cases, my law practice, and did all you could to help, aid, abet, guard, guide, help, and shield, the lying pieces of shit, who pretended to be me, with many of you fully aware of the swap of sisters, and other doubles! 

The second I got off the Road Runner Bus, that runs between, Grand Junction and Durango, I slipped through the cracks, between, two, sheriff K-9 trucks with shells on them, one going one way, and the other going the other way, and then a third, going up on Roosa Road, minutes later!  Just yesterday, while writing my blog about the Iron Horse Cycling Classic, I kept getting the feeling, and doing typos, that spelled, Go!  And sure as hell, a bit later, when I didn't heed the warnings, thinking, oh, come on, there is not a damned thing I have done in Durango, nor anywhere else, to merit this treatment, when a sheriff's deputy, probably on Mitt's Mormon Mafia payroll, pulled into McDonald's were I was typing the blog, about how good and fun Durango and the cycling races were, plus bringing up the competition between golf and cycling . . . oh, and I had a hard time pulling up the big ass hits, newest version of my blog, bad as con law chick blog, with 31,100,000 hits in 26 seconds, seeming to have disappeared over night, with hackers, helped by the fucking NSA undesirables, allowing access to steal my blog, since the third week of its existence, as if it doesn't even belong to me!  SISTER BITCH PROTECTED, she could never write one of these blogs, not ONE, in billion years!

Strange and Telling Dream Last Night . . . Sister Trying to Sell Custom Jewelry to a Cousin . . . Symbolic of "Fake" Jewelry, Which, in Reality, She Stole From MY Parowan, Utah House!  Also the Abuse of a Child! 

This dream was confusing and complex given the timeline, age of the abused child, a connection to a very different time in my life, when I was still married to my first husband, Richard Clifton Secrist, and the child abused, being a baby, with my baby, now, being only 32 years old, Elliot, who celebrated a birthday, May 3, 1983, the bass guitarist for Old School Parallax, Maraloka, God's Revolver, now Ditch in the Delta and Worst Friends, and if happened what I think happened with the music thieves, with a ring leader being Shelley's bastard son, which they all are, Isaac, knowing all the band members of all the old bands, and being one of the undesirables who stole God's Revolver music and marketed it around the world with none other than, cop kids, making up the other band members!  In the dream, the baby, who was just crawling, had been clearly abused, and had a nasty bump on his back, a raised bone, and a large bruised area, around the injury.  He had been in the watch of someone, other than myself, and Zeke or Richard, was much younger than he is now, with a body, much more like my oldest son, Chris'.

Shelley, The Custom Jewelry, The Red Cloth, Cousin Steve Bechstead, Abuse

But, the interesting part of the dream, was the part with Shelley in it . . . she was peddling her wares, which she stole from me, and took from my Parowan, Utah house, that she and Isaac, along with ex-husband, allegedly Allan Rex Bess, who was murdered by the killer pair, Shelley and Frank of Interpol, for the purpose of killing me, to make Frank, Allan, and Shelley, me, and Isaac, Elliot, to peddle his new CD, that God's Revolver did under contract with Sony Records, in a three record deal, that was basically killed by band members who refused to remix the second GR album or CD, and I think, that Elliot's new band's name, is telling indeed, WORST FRIENDS!  I believe that Trey and other band members, sold Elliot's brilliance as a bass guitarist, down the tube, with Isaac, Trey, teaming with Brett Todd Stewart or Stuart, who you can clearly see, in the video, of Scratch Done Dealt Me A Bad Hand . . . he is the one with the mohawk, standing out like a sore thumb, allegedly the one who owns the rights to "Little Black Horse Where Are You Going With Your Dead Rider."  Hard Rock Band and CD of 2008, the time that Isaac, disappeared from the band, Maraloka, with all the original band members, except Isaac, who was on tour with Elliot's music, gone for at least two years!

So, in the dream, older sister, Shelley, who cops, and maybe some of you, think is me, the undesirable, swapped out for the law abiding attorney, me, with cops, knowingly hunting me, to kill me, and let her have full reign of my fortune, including my children's music money and other credits, that have gone to cop families and children, with a vested interest in defending, protecting and preserving Shelley, as me, and Isaac as Elliot, justifying, Britney Spear type parents, or Michael Jackson, child protege's with overbearing parents, to rule their musical careers, thus bumping me and Richard or Zeke, out of the way, giving the vultures and undesirables, full access to the music, which, by the way, was long protected by a Poor Man's Copyright, filed by Elliot, who did everything for the band!  And here again the U.S. Constitution, protects, writings, like my blog, and inventions, with music right there too, with a section and clause that fully protects, and is the root section for patents and copyrights, protecting the writers from undesirables like the fuckers who are doing this to my sons, and me!  So if any of you butt fucking cops, want to earn your desireablity back, go do your fucking jobs, and check out the copyright dates, and they where far earlier than Brett's claimed, claim jumping purchase, which I am sure, Kay Burningham helped broker, in another symbolic record label, Exigent Records, housed in Kaysville, Utah!

Shelley, not me, sitting right here in Playplace, at McDonald's, having just gone to Walmart, and purchased, a pair of size 7 and a half, running or athletic shoes, three shirts, one bra, some ped black socks, and three pairs of underwear, that you fuckers, dumb asses, can verify, and get this shit right for once, and quit following me, with some lame ass cop, yesterday, who totally came in looking for me, head searching everywhere, looking up and down all the tables, apparently missing me, and even looking over his shoulders, and going into the bathroom, where I ditched, and later went into the kids playplace, after he left, empty handed, looking for me for, exactly what, Shelley's crimes, and they rang up to an including MURDER, only undesireable if I am Shelley?  What the fuck, is your fucking job, you fucks?  Defending a woman who stole so much money and put all of you on the take, making your rich on illegal and ill gotten gains, from may family!  Buck up, buckos and get this right, for once!  Good God!  

Anyway, Shelley, laid out her custom jewelry, on a symbolic red tablecloth, symbolic of power and fame, showing it to cousin, Steve, having taken that custom or fake jewelry from my home, from the old gun room, that I turned into a grand-daughter, nursery, with another room for the boys, having purchased some custom jewelry for my only grand-daughter at the time, Nicole's daughter, Gracie Mayor, who lives in Lovetteville, VA!  Shelley stole it for, McKinley Maughn, Shelley's daughter, Alexandra and her husband, Cliff, who live with their two children, one was born about a year or so ago!  George, Nicole's husband, and maybe her, will be pissed that I used their names, but I am sick and tired of paid staff, married to my kids, and them fucking their mother-in-law over, and pretending that Shelley, the fucking bitch from hell, is their mother, for money, or to keep peace in their family, or for whatever reason . . . they will have to worry about their own lies, if that is the case!  Honor thy father and mother, not the children!

Abuse of a Child . . . I Think My Children, Especially My Sons, Were Threatened and Even Abused, To Force Them to Go Along with this Bull Shit!

In addition to framing me, I think that Elliot, was framed for a crime that probably Isaac did, and was told by cops, who have the power to act like he did something, and said, you either give us, free reign of your music, or we will prosecute you for, this alleged crime.  I was framed too, because there is some fucking bounty out on me, for something, that I can't even guess!  At the time that the mob, the Mormon Mafia, was stealing El's music, and I was coming back into the law, in about 2008, the very same time, that God's Revolver was rockin' it, and going on a nationwide tour that was sabotaged, Chris was being taken to task also, with cops, and others in the law enforcement community, charging him with crimes, that were dropped, the day before court, because there was not merit, what so ever!  Brett, had contacted all my kids, when we were together, to see which of my children, would be willing to help me if need be . . . Chris, my oldest son, was the most willing to help, he was not married at the time, and would help!  That is who they went after, to make sure that nobody, no one of my children, the girls were already compromised by spouses, who were on the Mitt Mormon Mafia payroll, so Chris was the one who they needed to most fear!  So they compromised him out, until they felt safe with the music . . . I had been out of commission, but was coming back, but didn't have an active law degree, and had credibility issues, due to the Pick's Disease, which was well calculated into the equation of the family swaps and identity theft, which I guess is not the jurisdiction of cops?  Really?

There is not many things, more sacred to Elliot, than his music, other than his life, his safety, or that of his families safety.  Remember, these undesirable fuckers, are fucking MAFIA, and use mob tactics, like torture and murder, get real . . . Shelley's book shelves were full of serial killers, money laundering, and her favorite TV show was the Sopranos!  Get your shit together, they used all the tactics of the mob, the FBI, CIA, and cops, prosecutors and judges, they bought and sold, to take the music, the cases, my law practice, certificates, and now the blog, which just yesterday, could easily be accessed, just typing in bad as . . . beating out bad con, and taking all the hits!  Today, after the fun blog I wrote yesterday, the type that makes a shit load of money, at one penny per hit, and could be accessed, with just the two words, is now gone and you have to type in the whole phrase, bad as con law chick blog . . . go figure, outright theft!  God, I am sick and tired of this shit, get it right, I am not that fucking bitch Shelley, nor Rachel, Sue, Kay, Tiffany, Kelly, or Rebbecca and Hope!  No wonder there is so much crime, law enforcement are useful idiots and undesirables themselves, on the take!

Interesting Sexual Aspect, With Ex-Husband, That Didn't Make Sense, Other than To Mark a Particular Time in My Life

But it was funny, that I was with my ex-husband, whom, there has been little contact, over the last 25 or so years, since our divorce, and no sexual contact, from the second we got divorced, so this part, shocked me and would my children too.  But, I was with hubby, back in the day, and doing stuff that would embarrass me to admit doing with him, now, and probably then, but would do nothing to me, to think of doing with some guy, I am not married to right now!  James?  So, that part made me very uncomfortable, and seemed so taboo, but seemed more in context, when the baby was found, and had been abused.  I left the baby, that didn't look like any of my babies at all in any way shape of form, and that shocked me too, but who really knows there kids?  Many a parent wonders, but the baby had been abused and it was mine, so, I needed to get to the bottom of it, but the dream, ended, shortly after that with me bringing some soup, or a meal to Zeke, which is what I called Richard since we grew up together!  

In the dream, I had gone to the wrong address, not having gone to his address, indicating that there was a time warp, to now, or something, and I was directed that he had changed offices, and moved, so I took the dinner to his office.  I wondered what that meant, and the only meaning I could attach to it, was that he had been the custodial parent, by design, not through court, while I attended law school, we divorced in 1989, having filed, with me having custody, but during the 90 day waiting period, I had been accepted to law school, and started in the fall of 1990, with the full support of Zeke and the kids, even living with him after our divorce was final, in April of that year . . . now, does Shelley know all this, you might want to check, because her sorry ass didn't do any of this, but I know the government can teach a trained seal to recite facts, and I am sure that she had to know some of this, and could say some of it, but can she show an investigator, where my first apartment was, after leaving Zeke and the kids?  Verify, verify, verify . . . stop protecting the lying hag and sea witch, Kay, or any of the fraud broads, sex or no sex from them!  Have some nobility, honor, integrity, and do your fucking job, stop chasing me for the last three years, covering her ass!

You Ignore Your Dreams to Your Own Detriment!

RAGE THE TRAIN, DURANGO TO SILVERTON--CLASSIC IN FULL GALLOP . . . LOVE IS IN THIS TOWN, IRON HORSE BIKE RACERS, CHEER BABY BIKE ENTHUSIASTS . . . HOW DO YOU GROW A SPORT? GET THEM YOUNG & THEY WILL NOT DEPART FROM IT (BIBLE) . . . I FIGURED OUT WHY COLORADO'S COPS ARE NICE--THEY ARE IN THE MOUNTED PATROL, WEARING SPARKLING FAKE COP BADGES ON THEIR COATS, SMILE, SOME IN COWBOY HATS, YUM! BILLS PASSED, BUT POLICE REFORM CONVERSATION ONLY BEGINS . . . I WOULD SAY THIS IS A GOOD START, COLORADO LEGISLATURE! LOL! THIS LONE WOLF TERRORIST, DID NOT SHOOT THE SHERIFF, I THREW AWAY MY CELL PHONE TO AVOID SURVEILLANCE! AS CONGRESS LETS NSA DIALS DOWN ONCE-SECRET PHONE PROGRAM, PUTIN SIGNS LAW TO SHUT DOWN 'UNDESIRABLES'; IRELAND VICTORY "A MAGICAL MOVING MOMENT WHEN THE WORLD'S BEATING HEART IS IN IRELAND" . . . MARRIAGE BETWEEN 2 PEOPLE: TO THE REST OF THE WORLD: THIS IS WHAT IT MEANS TO BE DECENT, TO BE CIVILIZED AND TO BE TOLERANT." LET'S TAKE THIS THOUGHT TO RACISM, RELIGION, SEXISM, AND ALL THOSE OTHER INTOLERANT "ISMS", PEACE IS NOT A DREAM! POPE TO MAKE PIGEON RAISERS DREAM COME TRUE IN BOSNIA-HERZAGAVINA, WHERE THREE FACTIONS OF CITIZENS HAVE BEEN AT WAR FOR YEARS--POPE WILL RELEASE THREE PIGEONS, SYMBOLIZING THE THREE GROUPS, AND HOPE WHEN THE COME BACK HOME, THEY WILL BRING BLESSINGS OF PEACE ON THE LAND! WE CAN DO THIS WORLD--LOVE IS IN THIS WORLD! TOMORROW IS MEMORIAL DAY, HONOR YOUR DEAD, YOUR VETS, BUT LET'S PUT AN END TO WAR! THANKS FOR YOUR SERVICE & SACRIFICE . . . 21 GUN SALUTE TO YOU! LUV YA! ENJOY YOUR DAY! JOIN THE DEBATE . . . IS CYCLING THE NEW GOLF?

Horoscope Could Not Be More Right On . . . Sagittarius

As I find myself, not in Bozeman, Montana as planned, and in Durango, Colorado, back at my old haunts, the Durango Community Shelter, grateful to see familiar faces, and a welcome from nice, friendly, helpful staff, Talia, and the long-hair dude?, a warm bed, shower, and great food, from the Manna Soup Kitchen, and a friendly greeting from Jason, chief cook and bottle washer, really chef, gardener, welcome wagon, and just over all cool guy, a sense of calm, came over me, as I slept wonderfully, read the local newspaper, the Durango Herald, catching up with local news, with Talia inviting me to jump into local politics, but refraining from saying what her opinions were, we can't talk politics, religion, and other stuff, that is best left at the door of any home living situation, with people's opinions ranging from anarchist to constitutional law attorneys, from Mormon raised to atheists, from blacks to Jews, all under the same roof, our own little UN! Very smart rule of thumb, and Cheer for Charity!  That was engraved on one of the contributor bricks, on the outside of the mess hall, where there was hot take outs, for those of us, me, who thought, the amazing brunch Jason and volunteers serve each Sunday, was at 11:00 a.m., rather than 9:30 a.m., like it has always been, but, hey, I am a bit confused, being in several states a month at times, but glad there were leftovers! Yahoo!  Still hot and good eats . . . so here is my read for today!

Travel plans will be rescheduled, cancelled or changed in some way because things are unpredictable today.  Likewise, classes and educational efforts are subject to change.

If anyone, who follows this blog, read the harrowing experiences, both in Montana before I left, and at the Denver, bus terminal, it is a miracle that I am here, let alone alive, God Lives, and he lets me know, day by day, minute by minute, hour by hour, town by town, what I need to do to live hard, but die free . . . the first song as I came into McDonald's, here in Durango, was Suzanne, the plans they made for you, put an end to you . . . I always thought I would see you again!  I am always at the most risk, when I go from place to place, because, nobody, except, surveillance guys, ever knows when I leave and where I am going, including myself!  When things, heated up, if you know what I mean, in Kalispell, Montana, where I had a place to live and was working out at the gym everyday, and getting in shape, which proves difficult, when you are chased from one place to another, for expressing your first amendment rights, pissing off, everyone, either on one side or the other . . . remember the 12 people killed by terrorists, who worked at Charles Hebron, the satirical newspaper agency, that takes free speech and political satire to the extreme and pushes the envelope, much the way I do, but I don't have a building nor other staff as support, out there raw, real and relevant on my own . . . with everyone from political parties, to government agencies, to agenda funding emigrants from other countries, either wanting to use my blog and its large following and readership, for their own purposes, or to silence me, when I comment on positions that are foreign to what they want said on a blog with over a billion readers, on any given day . . . aside from the money connected with this blog, which I don't get, there is the Power Aspect, That I Fucking Love!  And due to that power, which is envied, coveted, borrowed, supported, hated, and despised, thus, I have a target on my back, head, heart, and about anywhere, that could cause me grief, pain, misery, and hurt me, up to and including, assassination!

Blog Control . . . No Sleeper Cells, No Guest Writers, My Educated Views, and the First Amendment!  Let Free Speech Rule the Day, But With Caution!

One day, while I was staying in Las Vegas, Nevada, basically on the run, from some entity or another, I had gone dancing at my favorite dance club, the Blue Martini, which is a mini-dating mecca, and UN in and of itself, with Vegas drawing money, power, glitz, glamour, gambling, girls, girls, girls, entertainment, etc., and a worldwide gathering place, but I have had Palestinians, Jews, Pakistanis, Republicans . . . LOL, try to pick me up, and persuade me, much like the honey trap methods of the CIA, FBI, and other world spy agencies, but I don't have the training, to either get information, or to disperse information that would benefit, these particular groups of people, with their own bent on political views; therefore, I am operating in a cloak and dagger world, operating like Ms. Magoo, if you remember the old cartoon!  Blissfully walking along, stepping on black cats, walking under shaky ladders, without glasses, handicapped, but without a care in the world and magically making it to my destinations!  

I saw a book on the shelves at the shelter, Mystery, I am sure to the people who want my scalp, yes, Indians too, they wonder, who I am able to avoid all the death traps!  Song on . . . I picked a bad time to be in love!  LOL!  Yeah, I would say that sweetheart . . . Oh, the point I was trying to make, is that while in Vegas, I watched an FBI or I.D. Network, True Crimes episode, at the same time, this Christian Jew, from Israel, was hitting on me, trying to take me out, wanted to marry me, along with his terrorist cousins, Palestinians, mixed bag of guys together, but, as I listened to this program about some radio talk show host, who was very popular and had a large listening audience, was contacted by local, I believe, American Palestinians, and wanted him to present their views of the Israeli/Palestinian conflict in the Mid-East, and he would not, so they killed the guy!  I was suppose to have a date with this Christian Jew from Israel, and was looking forward to it, but I made short shift of that date, after thinking that I am probably tapped into some secret terrorist cell here in America, who is going to kill me tonight on the date if I don't use my blog to promote their propaganda!  

I cancelled the date, not due to anything, but fear!  Anyway, as I was walking on the way here, there was a stencil on the ground that said, Dispatrol, I am not sure what that means, but I am going to interpret it to mean, since I just left the happy cowboy cops, the mounted patrol, that the local ladies are doing their jobs, and keeping the testrostem crowd of cops, under control, and I don't need to do more than the Colorado Legislature is already doing, passing 6 bills to reform cops, with 4 that didn't make it, and locals taking on the message of Prez. O, that we need to do more than send cops into our cities, that are dilapidated, run down, crime ridden, and challenged, and expect them to just do crowd control, we need to really fix issues that have plagued Ferguson, Baltimore, and other cities across the country . . . with someone writing about the condition of down town Durango, issues of paint, sweeping sidewalks, and other things, like jobs, opportunities, education, gardens, etc. . . . we need a holistic approach to problems in cities, and not make cops the scapegoats, that was hard to say.  LOL!  Just kidding . . .

Iron Horse Bicyclist Classic, Kids From 12 to 5 Years of Age . . . Everything I Love, Mountains, Families, Fun, Sunshine, and Love, Going on this Morning in Durango!  And colors, colors, colors . . . Ma, Pop, and Kids in Bike Outfitting!

What a great morning, sunshine, clouds, cool weather, but warm too, with the weather, undecided as to what it was going to do, the gorgeous mountainscapes, a back drop, to tons of kids, parents, volunteers, cheers, colors, bikes, helmets, strange animals, leading the kids, on bikes, several times around the race tracks, downtown Durango, Coca Cola stands, music, MCs, signs over the finish line, RAGE THE TRAIN, fun crowds, sparkly cops, with cowboy hats on, smiles, parents watching their kids, who, just yesterday competed in the adult Iron Horse Race, from Durango to Silverton, following the routes of the Historic Railroad Line, Durango to Silverton, with a special double smoke stack, that train owners brought in for the Memorial Day Weekend, the race, and to honor our military vets, who, I think got to take the train free, with their families?  The owner of the train, said that this will be part of this weekend celebration, every year from now on . . . wonderful, lovely, and great family entertainment, there is love in this town, I feel it!  In fact, as I saw parents and kids, interacting, cheering, raising children up on their shoulders, sharing a sport, they can all do together, I thought back to Sundays, with my own children, pushing them to get dressed, to give a talk in church, having them sit quiet, and listen to speakers they didn't give a rat's ass about . . . and wondered, what my relationship would have been if we did this type of activity together?  Heaven on earth?  Not that I would dis-religion, because, I love it, or rather love, God, Jesus and his teachings, but I could have still done that, and many do?  Who knows, no formula for a successful family, nor love between parents and children, but this seemed a great way to spend a Sunday, especially as parents competed yesterday in the big people's race, where I am sure that some of these bikers kids, watched mom and dad, and cheered their parents on, and now the tables were reversed and the parents, cheered for the kids! 

I guess the Iron Horse race between Durango and Silverton, was won by a kid, relatively speaking, who competed against legend bikers, 40 years his senior.  But, hey, don't feel bad, I guess this same kid, now a phenomena in the biking world, biking among legends, also beat Lance Armstrong, when he was 16 . . . gotta love, the new generation, bucking to take the reigns from the baby boomers and gen xers, and doing a damned good job of it, as evidenced yesterday . . . they want to lead . . . it's getting time!  As I see my own daughter, and maybe my son, going to law school, I can't wait, getting tired of fighting daily, to turn the relay race baton, running the good race, over to good hands, that will stand on my shoulders, just like these little bikers today, carrying the values of their parents, into the next generation, being well breed, well taught, and tutored by loving parents, in the ways of truth, righteousness, law, health, sport, and whatever . . . what a great day!  Thank YOU!  What a beautiful morning . . . and then some!

Maybe Compromise is Right . . . NSA Sunsets in U.S., Putin Allows Prosecutors to go after those Who threaten Constitution, Defense and Security, While Ireland, Highlights Love as the Heart of the World!

What a great and magical place this world is . . . we can learn, watch, enjoy, teach, share, and envision, a world, with varying ideas, that might make our lives, as members of the species, safer, smarter, more humanitarian, more kind, more peaceful and loving, with nations serving as 193 laboratories of social justice, change, laws, visions, scientific experiments, social engineering, until we can all come to a higher standard of living, with all of us, getting more and more connected, less war-like, and willing to work things out, resolving things through diplomacy, rather than blood-shed, war, revolt, and revolution, unless it is the revolution of love and peace!  Interesting comparisons, systems, can't say what is good or bad, until the jury is in, as to what works and doesn't work.  No one country has a corner on the market of good and evil, they all have both, some less than others, and who is to say, only history will tell the stories of this world, and what worked and didn't work, glad some are willing to step up and make a difference, leave their footprints on this earth, for generations to come to survive, breath, live and love, shining on!  All we can do is try . . . scrap the bad, and return, keep and defend the good!

This morning there was an article, focusing on the alleged conflict or challenges in international relations between the U.S. and Israel, after the rough road lately, nuke talks, visits, elections, and dealing with crisis in mid-east . . . and I loved the way Pres. O, responded, and said something to the effect, that the conflict was over-rated, and the U.S. would always have Israel's back, but friends tell friends what they need to hear, not what they want to hear . . . with regard to making that area of the world safer, in whatever it takes, whether Israel likes it or not.  The world is well aware of what happened to the Jews and the challenges they still face, and we are not going to let it happen again, but in return, Israel, can't expect, that friendship means dissing every other country, to excluding their existence and right to life, forget it, there are competing interests, and one country doesn't get all the benefits and none of the compromises, where everyone gets something and everyone gives up something!  Compromise is the way to resolve these pressing international and national issues!

Reaching Across the Isle, Politically, Getting Easier and Easier!  Putin's Use of the Word, "Undesirables" Should Be Used Here Too!

I would define, political undesirables, as anyone, who threatens the constitutions, defense and security too, but understanding that going for freedom and security, you will end up with neither one, thus echoing the quote made by Senator Rand Paul, in his hour long, not quite a filibuster, but damned near close, when he said, We should never give up our rights for a false sense of security.  He was making reference to the NSA, metadata programs, that have failed to show that it has ever stopped a terrorist attack, but it has demonstrated over and over again, the violation of citizens' rights, through spying on Americans!  It is ironic, that fellow Republican, Chris Christie, was critical of Senator Paul, in his interpretation of what is and is not desirable, as far as national security goes, and what we should and should not be doing.  I believe that this is where we should be as a nation, with the Constitution being our guide, and people of both sides of the political isle, closely on one side or the other of issues, and not in lock step with the whole fucking party, Democrat or Republican . . . Congress represents very diverse and different political landscapes, with constituents differing from one county to another, within their own states, with 50 shades of Republicans and 50 shades of Democrats, but while close on somethings, should not be light years apart, given the Constitution, as a compromise originally, being in the middle, leaving people just right or just left of the middle, as a touch stone, not extremely divergent, as to seem like they are from different planets!

There was a funny cartoon, by Skilly, in the local newspaper this morning, and it showed the Capitol Building in Washington, D.C., in the background, a woman sitting on a bench, reading a newspaper, that had the headline, Airbag Recall, with her looking wantonly into space with the caption, If only . . . as two bloated, suited, blow hard's, one with Congress written on his brief case, leaving D.C. for Memorial Day celebrations in their home states . . . LOL!  However, I do believe that things are changing, instead of being the do nothing Congress of the last 6 years, debates are starting to take place, issues raised, and business as normal is being challenged, and Congress is starting to take their proper role, as the law makers, and a branch of government, that has a critical duty that can't be abdicated to the President, who is more than willing to take, or to the Supreme Court, making up the judiciary and the executive branches . . . it is a power thing, meant to be a balance of power, with three branches keeping each other in check!  

Now that having been said, let me go on to my next point . . .  

No One Political Party Has a Corner on an Issue!

Just today and yesterday, I was reading both news, catching up on the news that was available, and first there was a U.S. Senator from Colorado, who was proposing that birth control should be made available as an over the counter drug, at local stores . . . good idea!  Planned Parenthood, traditionally liberal, connected with more Democrats and their pro-choice leanings, is suspicious of the Senator, thinking that he is wanting this to undermine the ACA, or the Affordable Care Act, Obamacare, most noted, and think that he has some sinister plans to make woman, who are now covered for birth control, pay twice, once at the counter and once through insurance.  Now, wait just a minute here, the pill has proven, over years, since about 1969 to be a reliable form of birth control, and Planned Parenthood, distributes the pill, for a minimal cost to patrons of the organization.  Here we have a great opportunity to make the pill convenient, affordable, and available, without going to a doctor or Planned Parenthood Clinics to get, something, that both sides can agree on, lowering the level of abortions, through prevention, and the pill!  This is like Planned Parenthood, cutting off their nose to spite their face!  Stop being suspicious of political leanings that are starting to see the wisdom in taking control of reproduction, and thus giving women choices, while lowering the abortion rate, a a win/win compromise and solution!

I seriously, don't think anyone, would prefer abortion to birth control, but if a woman needs to fight, disclose to her employer, or apply for insurance to cover her birth control, that may be prohibitive, and stop her from getting the protection she needs or may delay her reproductive care, taking the position, that human beings are wired for sex . . . and both Republicans and Democrats participate in this sport and enjoyment, probably equally!  If we take a holistic approach, looking more and nature, or a secular arena, in government and making our laws, which is what the founding fathers tried to do, being much more religious than we are today, putting their religion aside to make laws for both religious and non-religious persons, respecting freedom of religion or freedom from religion, looking for personal perfection, rather than forcing our views on others, and respecting their right to worship or not worship as they will!  That goes for reproductive health, smart people prepare, plan, take charge, and need access, and that may not always be going to a doctor, when the pill has been approved for decades.  Business as usual, is making people go to a doctor, to say, okay, now you can get on the pill!  Or having to rely on Planned Parenthood to do an exam before giving women the pill . . . let women grow up, take charge, be responsible, as men should too, and control their own lives, destiny, careers, and children.  People who use birth control, or even get abortions, go on to have children later, when life, love and security are available, making for better mothers, and more loved children, happier dads and families!

As, Senator, Ellen Roberts, (R. Durango) who I want to thank for working on bills for cop reform, but now being criticized by people for being both pro-choice and in favor of a bill to make a fetus of personhood status, for the sake of mothers who loose babies, due to domestic violence with the target the baby, or pimps, getting rid of prostitutes as a sex commodity, wanting to get rid of a pregnancy, to keep the figure and the possibility of profits, by beating the woman to get rid of the fetus, which may be her ticket out of human body trafficking . . . we need to think more sophisticated, and people who can, who have what appears to be positions that are politically opposing, when you look at the arguments, are really spot, dead center, right on!  We need to allow for diversity of thinking, hybrid thinking, within our own parties, and reach across the isle with people of different parties, seeing complexities, paradoxes, and paradigm shifts that are really just better thinking than the old black and white, Republican/Democrat positions!  Being human, is complicated!  At best, let's make laws that reflect that complexity!

Fun, Finish . . . Is Cycling the New Golf?

That is a debate that was taken up in the newspaper, as cyclists, take to the hills, in commradary and challenge of biking the 47 miles between Durango and Silverton, in the Iron Horse Cycling Race, yesterday, with many, seeing golf, that was originally taken up by professionals, as a way to both exercise and handle business in a more recreational way, while walking and talking on the golf course around the country.  Well, now, you have cyclists telling professionals, in this health conscious part of the country, that you will get more cardiovascular exercise biking than playing golf and it will cost you about the same, but not wanting biking to take on the elitist label, dividing the masses, like golf, that has become a class sport.  Some biking enthusiasts, disagree with any comparison, finding little to compare between golf and cycling.  Now the thing that I like about playing golf, is that I can talk for an entire, generally, hour and a half, and have a captive partner, who shares my golf cart with me, if not the other pair in the foursome.  Where, if I have to extend more cardiovascular effort, while biking, I am sure that I cannot, bike and talk at the same time, I would have the breath, and I have to keep up with my buddies, on other bikes, being maybe in front of me, cutting through wind and air patterns that would help me cycle faster, but not necessarily carry on a better conversation.  Now, the biker fans said that they are going to have more activities . . . like what?

I think, that golf, is kind of lazy man and woman's sport, if you are lucky, and your game goes as planned, you get to ride, exert no effort, other than to get out of the cart, hopefully, only about 4 times on a 4 par, and 3 times per hit, on a three par, which is generally not the case, and sometimes, i may have 12 hits per a 4 par, hiking through the rough, wading in knee deep water, looking for my Titlist ball, lost in the deep of the pond or water hazard, or if you are on the 16th or 17th hole, down in St. George, at Sunny Brook Golf Course, if memory serves, you tee off from a hill, and have to land on an island, which is not much bigger than the green itself!  And you have a water hazard, completely surrounding the flag and pin!  So, swimming may be a necessary part of this game, rivaling the dreaded Iron Man, made up of part, cycling, swimming and running!  LOL!  

When I was first married, I wanted to be a pro golfer, a two week sex filled marriage, followed by a sexless pregnancy, two weeks later, kind of dampered my spirits, that morning sickness kind of changed plans, but a big belly improved my game by forcing me to keep my arms stgaight while teeing off . . . but, having loved the game since I was in junior high and being pretty darned good at it, even impressing the two guys, who were forced to be in me and my husband's foursome, on our golf part of our honeymoon, in St. George and later, in Vegas, during Thanksgiving break, while student hubby, had a few days off, were impressed that my husband got his new bride to play golf . . . he said, I didn't teach her to play or get into golf, she got me into it!  LOL!  They were impressed and shocked, a female golfer?  Really?  Like I said, best way to prepare to be an attorney too . . . five male golfers, at the Utah Attorney Generals Office, raced to St. George to steal me away from the county attorney, but really just used that as an excuse to get on the golf courses, and to get me on a course to check out my credibility and see if I was lying on my job application, hit a worm burner on the first tee, as my boss, Mark Nash, sliced his tee off shot, and hit the condos behind him, while we were at a conference in Huntington Beach, for a prosecutors' training . . . nice job, never should have left it, up the down staircase!  But, Mark's comment was priceless, he said, well, now we have that first hit over and we both suck!  LOL!  No, I just hadn't played for a while, and killed the next few shots, and after 10 domestic violence trainings, hitting the golf course after each training, I could beat all the boys, attorney, cop, and social worker!  LOL!

I am a hack cyclist and want to get better.  But a few years ago, after being diagnosed to die, and giving up my driver's license in Utah, for about 9 years between 2000 to 2009, I periodically rode a bike and loved it. I think I was riding my niece's bike, Shelley's daughter, Alex, kind of a mix between a road bike and a mountain bike and loved it!  I would ride all over the place and come home, wanting to ride more, and would cruise down to the nearest parking lot and even ride around in circles, feeling the cool summer nights, the wind in my hair, and digging life, with a freedom that walking can't give you.  I hope to become more familiar with biking, but, I don't think one sport needs to compete, nor necessarily prohibit the other, they are both, kick ass fun!  One of the interviewees, made the statement that biking is harder than golf or more dangerous, not necessarily, you haven't seen two very competitive attorneys, me and Mike, down on Angel Golf Course in Vegas, competing during the game as we did in undergraduate school, both being Outstanding English Students and Honored Humanities Recipients, graduating with a mere .044 GPA difference, racing across the golf course, when I challenged Mike, who was driving the other cart, LOL! And, I insisted that my daughters, both learn how to golf, taught the sons too, but really wanted to make sure the girls knew how to golf, and see it worked, Greta is going to law school!  But, Greta, was golfing with her boyfriend, while in the Navy, and he tipped over the golf cart on her knee or leg, and she has contemplated getting knee surgery, even 20 years later . . . I don't know if I would call, golf a blood sport, but there are hidden dangers, like stupid boyfriend drivers, and competitive, attorneys, breaking all the rules of golf ettiquite!  LOL!  I just know golf better than cycling, but I can alway recreate myself!  I still have time!

Last time I came to Durango, a month ago, I was asleep, and missed the scenery . . . Holy Shit . . . the San Juan Mountain Range, 2,000 feet higher than Montana Mountains!  Rugged, Jagged, Awesome, Beautiful, Gorgeous . . . No corner on beauty . . . all over God's Green Earth!  The local San Juan Mountain Association is Having Something?  Check it out . . . I rushed to breakfast, so look up the info in Newspaper!

HOT ROD--HOT COMMODITIES, KISS OF THE SPIDER WOMAN, WINDS OF FATE . . . IF IT FEELS THIS GOOD BEING USED, JUST KEEP ON USING ME, UNTIL YOU USE ME UP! LOL! I JUST HAD A GREAT HOT CROISSANT BREAKFAST SANDWICH, AT ROASTERS EXPRESSO & SUBS, IN GRAND JUNCTION, COLORADO . . . ON MY WAY TO DURANGO--I THINK ME & COLORADO, POLITICALLY MIGHT BE A BETTER MATCH OR MIX THAN MONTANA, THAT WILL REMAIN TO BE SEEN, IT IS AN EARLY MATCH . . . NICER COPS, MEANER LEGISLATURE! LOL! LAST TIME I WAS IN DURANGO, THE COPS HAD AN ETHICS PRESENTATION & TRAINING, AND THEY LET ME ATTEND--NICE GUYS! UNCONSCIONABLY NICE FOR COPS! LOL! I HAVEN'T BEEN FOLLOWING THE NEWS, SO I AM NOT SURE WHAT IS GOING ON WITH THE PATRIOT ACT, WHETHER IT WILL BE LEFT UNFUNDED, AND SUNSET, GOING AWAY, OR IF IT WILL BE FUNDED AND WE THE PEOPLE HAVE TO DEMAND, A DISTINCTION BETWEEN CITIZENS & TERRORISTS, DEMANDING THAT WE GET OUR CIVIL & CONSTITUTIONAL RIGHTS! LAST WEDNESDAY, SENATOR RAND PAUL, SPENT 10 OR MORE HOURS TRYING TO STEM OFF THE VOTE ON THE HIDEOUS ACT, BEING USED AGAINST US, ME, IN PARTICULARLY OR ANYONE WHO VOICES A CONVINCING OPINION ABOUT GOVERNMENT ISSUES, IN AN OPEN FORUM. GUESS WE WILL JUST HAVE TO WAIT AND SEE, MAYBE WE WILL KNOW AFTER MEMORIAL DAY, WHEN CONGRESS RECONVENES . . . WE ARE APPROACHING THE CELEBRATION OF THE GRATEFUL DEAD! LOL!

It's Saturday, We Need Some Fun . . . Hot Rod Movie, Reminded Me of Mr. James Kennedy!

The other day, or rather night, I had a 7 hour layover, in Butte, Montana, at the bus terminal, the scene of the crime, Kennedy, so peacefully sleeping, lips parsed, perfectly separated, kissable, body relaxed in a dream state, with me wondering if I should take advantage of him or not, worried, that he might, waken a beast, rather than the beauty of a man he is . . . just because I trash someone on my blog, doesn't mean that he will forever be removed from my mind, especially, when I am in the town, with no other choice, all roads lead to Butte, in Montana, when riding the bus, where I met the man, who caught my eye and entertained my heart, for a while, and at times does again, off and on . . . but, there was this corny teen movie on called, Hot Rod, and the kid, who played the lead role, reminded me of the Kennedy that appeared after all the scamming chick lines he could employ and use on me, with no avail, but at least making me know he was interested, and not only interested, but actually actively pursuing me, more like a 9th grader with a crush on the prom queen, than, the bad ass biker, mountain man he is, or I think he is.

I only got to see the first half hour or so, and the part that reminded me of him, was, his boy like crush on the neighbor girl, and the actor's physique, somewhat reminded me of James' who is in perfect physical fitness by all appearances, wondering how that is possible, since all he chugs down in the morning is a shit load of coffee, and he tops that off with cigarettes, or pot, since we are in Colorado, I can say it without getting him in trouble, but, in Montana, he should not be smoking the stuff!  I always error on the side of safety, especially, because a false move, given my history with the cops, might mean the death penalty for me! LOL! Hell, I don't even need to commit a crime, for the cops to want my head on a spear to parade around the nation!  So, I will pass . . . don't like it anyway, but defend your right and Kennedy's right to do what he wants with his body . . . he is free, male and over the age of 21!  Do what you want, but, as your attorney, only do it in Colorado, Washington, and Washington, D.C.!  Don't want to have to defend your sorry asses!

My Greatest Flaw in Love . . . Something Psychologists Call Projection

I have the bad habit, of taking my noble, impeccable, and admirable, character traits, such as in my commitment to the oaths I take, like in marriage, defending, protecting and preserving the U.S. and whatever state I happen to be in, Constitutions, at whatever personal, private, and professional risk, effort, and cost. And as a result, whatever man of the moment, that I am interested in, acts like a looking glass to me, and rather than taking the man at face value, for exactly what I see him doing, I tend to take him, them and create them in my own image.  Does that make sense? Since I am loyal, committed, faithful . . . not that we have a relationship of any merit, and probably never will, the principles are the same, but I am faithful, for the most part or as far and as long as I can, and if I will stray, I divorce, breakup, or leave first, rather than betray some one's trust, they have in me.  That goes for the professional arena too.  I picture, Kennedy, much in the same light as I do myself, risking all fates, temptations, like a money bribe, or a promise of a hotter version of me, if that were possible, LOL, and love would conquer all, exposure to death, fire, and wrath of peer groups, doing what we all took an oath to do, without exceptions!

However, I am an idealist, and the Constitution is an ideal, that we have yet to reach, as I witnessed in the statements from a wonderful, 97 year old black man, who has not only succeeded in conquering prejudice, although, he said, he has been fortunate, given the time period he has lived in between 1918 when he was born, and up to the present time, not only going to an Ivy League university, getting a master's degree, and working as an engineer, all over the world for large and successful companies, being the envy of many a white man, who claimed all along his pathway to success, that due to the color of his skin, he could not succeed or get the promotion, the job, the education, or the raises that he did, with the white crackers, doing all in their power, to stop his clawing and scratching his way to the top of the fields he worked in.  One his first job, the boss said, I can't hire you, you are black . . . he said, no, I am brown, and putting his skin up next to something that was truly black, he said, now that is black and I am brown!  The boss hired him, because he was such a smart alack!  I asked him when he retired, and he said, three weeks ago!  The boss valued him so much, and kept him long beyond retirement, until he finally threw in the towel and said he didn't function the way he used to, and quit, at age 97!  The boss still tried to keep this man, he had so much respect for, and had nothing but total trust in, a rare commodity now days!

No Excuses for Failure . . . If So . . . Let Me Help You!  

He lived in all white neighborhoods, that were very wealthy, and many people, his neighbors, like a rich brain surgeon, informed him when doing his lawns and flower gardens himself that he needed to have servants to do that for him . . . so he hired the best and the brightest landscape architects, and put the rest of the hood to shame, with the neighbors, complaining about that too!  LOL!  He had such a good attitude, and he spread it to a young man, he met in the bus terminal . . . told him the keys to making money, and said if the young man, didn't find the job he wanted and some semblance of success, where he was going, to come back to him, in Las Vegas, and he would actually put him into some type of educational training, college or something and make a success of him!  Awesome!  I guess he and his wife are of the Pentecostal Faith, and he said they both live very comfortable, but any money, beyond their basic living expenses, he donates the surplus to the church or some other good cause, and he has already set up three college funds, for three young people in his church!  So cool . . . and his wife, each week, goes around to the grocery stores, and gathers all the food, that has an expired date, some that haven't yet, also, and brings them to set at the church for people in need . . . she is 67 years old, and they are both still serving, loving, sharing, and making great contributions to the world.  It was fun talking to him for 5 hours, through the night and getting ideas, and being inspired by his great life, and seeing him, look a good 20 years younger, with health, vitality, and goodness, truly someone worth emulating!

You Need to Not Only Be Educated, But Learn to Manipulate Your Education or Learning--Application of the Concept of Projection

This man, was raised in Michigan, in a family of 11, 9 kids, and he said he never even heard of the concept of money, currency, until he was 7 years old, and some man told him about money!  And he said he started making it from that point forward, saying, I can do that.  By age 10 he was making more money than his father, who told him, if he didn't get control over his attitudes, he could just pack up his stuff and leave!  All done tongue in cheek, of course, but he took the lawn clipping from grass, gathered it up from all the neighbors, in a little wagon, and took it over the the white section of town, said he was never discriminated against, nor sent away, and sold it to them for filling for their chicken coops, giving the chickens, their eggs and chicks, a softer bed to lay in and for the people to gather the eggs from, rather than the harder hey.  He sold copies of Life and Post magazines to the rich white folks, and had a hopping business, like I said, making more than his father, who mainly did bartering for what the family needed.  He said, a person can always create a service, a product, or something of value, that other people will need, use, and buy!

Just a note on money, this man has made in his prime, upwards to millions in a two year period with his own company . . . but after all that, he says anything beyond his needs he gives away, and each week, he has his wife, give him only $16 just to have some cash in his hands!  And he said, in most weeks, he is unlikely to even spend that!  I think if money is your goal, you are chasing the elusive butterfly, but if you do what you love, you will always love what you do, and the money just seems to come naturally.  Transitioning, to the personal relationship realm, let's go forward to the application or the manipulation of knowledge or learning. But first, a note on education, out of the 9 children, from very poor roots, living during Jim Crow laws of separate but, equal, 6 of his sisters, got Ph.Ds and three taught at colleges!  Their mother didn't even know how to read and write!  I can see where he gets his attitude, that there is not excuse to do something other than succeed, make money and get ahead in life, because if any family, kids, had an excuse for facing challenges, his family could!

The Only Problems with One of These . . . Is They Think, They Need One of These!  Pointing to Women, Having to Have a Man!

This was the opening statement, in a communications class, I had, at Weber State University, as a communications minor, English major, and having been married at that time for about 12 years, so, at the time, that, proudly didn't apply to me or my situation; however, times change, and sometimes we chose to go into the wild, jungle or the mature, if it can qualify, landscape of the older dating scene and all its follies, pitfalls, and extremes!  This phase that some of you will go through, or are in, or see your parents go through, is not for the faint of heart.  Like I have previously said, James Kennedy has been married 6 times and me, 4 times . . . so, you can only imagine the personal baggage, and psychological burdens, that both of us face, by ourselves, but together, shit, could we ever even have a chance?  And this is all hypothetical, because I have not seen, talked to, or met up with the mountain man, for a while, and my never again . . . but, at times it makes life more fun to have an object of my emotions and affections, regardless of reality . . . that has never seemed like a condition for random loving for me, remember, I am an idealist!

I was married to my first husband, the father of my four children, for roughly 15 years.  And about every 5 years or so, I get this weak thought, that I need one of those, men!  LOL!  And Mr. Kennedy, came along, at just about the 5 year mark since my last marriage, so it is time for stupid me, again, to fall to the idea, that it might be nice to share my life with someone, sit by a fire, hold hands, watch a sunset, but when I do get hitched, that need dissipates, and my need for freedoms, starts to replace those cozy little feelings, and the call of the wild, beckons me!  I have a romantic attention span of about 18 months, and then, something takes over, and I fly the coop!  My need for nesting, comfort, security, and even a committed love, just kind of up and walks away.  Now, I am not a good example in this area, and people wonder how I can be so smart in the law, and so stupid in personal relationships . . . I haven't figured that one out yet.  The one thing that gives me thought, and reason with James, is he is about a wild as I am, and as in algebra, two negatives might make a positive!  LOL!  But, again, it may not, so, it is a flip of the coin, if I ever see him again, but I am at least curious enough to check it out, or at least I think I would be willing?  But is he, and where is he, is he still alive? 

The question still remains, is he who I am projecting him to be, like I did with my last four lovers, husbands, and whatever?  Or, am I letting his brutal good looks, cloud my vision, and mind, making him, merely a figment of my imagination . . . I really don't know him all that well, he could be just a shell of a man, with nothing but looks and that would never work for me.  Or again, he could be deep, learned, and someone that I would adore?  I guess that is the fun of discovery . . . just keep the projections out of the relationship and see the man for who he is, standing alone, free and unfettered by your personality and character.  We tend to think that since we are honest, they are honest, because we love them, they surely must love us, or because we are smart, and they have 9 years of post-graduate education behind them, that they are telling the truth, or that is makes them smarter than the average man, that is somewhat lacking in my mind, thoughts and heart, real or not!  Extrapolate yourself out of the equation, deal with what you see, because that is what you are going to get.  Much like a criminal case, or a situation, judge the man or woman, men on facts, evidence, experience, and exposure, through manipulating the situation to reveal the real person, not the one you want them to be!  With the Kennedy name, there is a lot of expectation, both by way of good in a political sense, but not so good, in a personal sense . . . Kennedy men?  I wish I could ask Marilyn?

Hot Rod and the Good Traits, Through Evidence, Experience and Facts

Unlike most women, I have to factor in the government factor, that this person may not be who they say they are, or who they look like they belong to, and that their motives are noble and beyond reproach, or devious, dastardly, and contrary to your best interest, whether in a relationship or not, like they are there to assassinate you, that handsome Mr. 24, who is nothing more than bait, to lure you into a vulnerable situation, leaving you open to things, places, and events that may not be in your best interest, and better, had they never been presented, with huge, and horrible consequences . . . always possible, you are an assignment, an experiment, a lab rat to be tested, watched and later sacrificed in the name of science, the government, or national security!  But, at least at first, this didn't seem to be the case with Kennedy, he genuinely, and I felt it, the lost ring thing, early impressions . . . but, he seemed authentically interested, cool, easy, and if I was assigned to clean the tables after the crew at the Butte Rescue Mission ate, he was helping me, putting up chairs, or if reading scriptures, he seemed to know them, or he would wait, like the guy in the movie, who had a crush on the next door neighbor and wait for me, pretending to be shoveling the sidewalks, and just happened to be out, when I would get back from writing my blog at the library or somewhere.

The gals who would pay attention to all the little things going on at the Mission, would notice, that James, always, looked in the door, for where I was sitting, and then, never failed, to go up and pull up a chair, near mine, pulling my chair closer to his . . . I dug that, miss it, and felt that was real.  I could feel, that the closer we got, the more he was at risk, of getting hurt, or paying for just simply liking me, and felt I should have left weeks or at least days earlier, so he didn't suffer the fate of other guys, who dared like me . . . sad as that sounds, when you deal in the level and power of the guys I was with, they had the power to put the hurt on him, just for looking at me, not that they wanted me, they just didn't want him with me.  I had hurt them and they knew, that it was much harder to hurt me personally, than to hurt someone I cared about, which would hurt me more, so the weapon of choice, is to go after the heart throb, hurt them, or condition me to leave them.  I know, that when I left, the day, I knew, that ears other than mine and his, heard the sweet somethings we whispered, he would be hurt if I didn't leave, which I did, often being in denial, until it was too late, not this time . . . I left, you can only remain in ignorance or bliss, and then it becomes your fault, well, not really, but whether you like it or not, that is just the way it is.

Terms of Endearment

One time, I saw James come out of the men's dorm, before me, until he saw where I was, and he actually, went back downstairs, and came up again, acting, nonchalant, and just happened to always hit me at just the right time, but I loved it, that little bit of attention, that someone like me would appreciate.  I loved the intense way he would actually listen to what I had to say, as far as his broken leg, and remedies, that might help.  I told him to drink more milk and not just coffee, at dinner that night, he not only got a drink of milk, he took the whole gallon, and downed in, right in front of me . . . that shows he cared what I had to say, and valued the in put, which is cool.  I told him to do rotation exercises to keep the flexibility in his ankles, showing him, what to do, and he took it to heart.  My first husband, the things I said to him the first week, were the same things I would have said after 15 years, just didn't seem to give a shit, while being a cool guy and a good man.  James always made sure I had Diet Coke money, shared what he had . . . just little things, but the things that make so much difference in a relationship, doing something right!  He proved, not in a huge way, that he cared about what I said, and what I thought.

One time, James found a blanket, somewhere, that he wanted to clean for his tramp camp, and he had washed the blanket, and asked me, assuming I do something, other than throw my clothes away, and get a new roll of Walmart underwear, once in a while, asked me, where to put the fabric softener, in the washing machine . . . I hadn't done wash, since I bought new washer and dryer, for my Parowan house, in 2012, when they started chasing me non-stop between, Utah and Montana.  I told him, I didn't know, and I really didn't; I believe, someone else told him where to put the softener, it may be in the wash cycle, shows you what I remember!  LOL!  Wrong gal to ask, but, that's me.  Somehow, James figured it out, and after the blanket got out of the wash, I think, he came in just like a little kid, all excited at how clean he got the blanket!  He held it up, showed me the blanket from all sides, and mentioned that it looked brand new, and it did, but his delight was what was fun, just so amazed that this filthy blanket could get clean . . . I remember, thinking, that is kind of like repentance and what Christ's grace can do for people . . . Jesus, my only hope is in you . . . there is no grave that your love can't resurrect!  I wondered if James saw the comparison?

When I Came Back a Second Time . . . I Could Feel the Hurt!

I left without telling him, I was leaving, first because, I didn't want surveillance picking up what we were saying and where I was going . . . I am at the most risk, when in route to some, undisclosed destination, because, nobody knows were I am 90% of the time, that I care about, but the bad guys who want my ass buried somewhere in the backwoods, do know, but element of surprise gives me an edge and it can't be underestimated . . . and I can't afford to sit and discuss it, or debate leaving, I just do it!  If I had my way, and felt that James was safe, I would never have left his side, ever, with things looking good and digging what was going on, never . . . but I couldn't tell him that, and bear the burden of them possibly killing him, like the others, and he could at least survive the emotional pain and live, but waiting, may cost him his life . . . an he would not even know why!  It took him a week or so after I got back, to even approach me and ask, why I left, his tone, his voice, his mannerisms, and the pain, let me know, it hurt him way more than he was leading on, and that hurt, but was necessary, and so was the second time I left, after he asked me to go to Durango, or suggested it, knowing, that with a third surveillance camera up on the wall, placed there in the last week, they were watching and both of us, not hanging out the way we did before.

We sat across the room from each other and pretended to be almost strangers, after I told him about the other guys who had suffered a fate, way worse than his, which killed me just with that, hated to see, someone so fit, so physical, so high energy, struggle with the broken leg or the wound from the shot, or whatever, and see him be limited in what he could do, knowing he hated the restrictions, the crutches, the awkward leg and foot boot.  I think that may have hurt me, more than he knew, and knowing that it may very well, have been in a connected way, my fault.  They say, in dog bite cases, that each owner gets one free bite, and then from that point after, the owner is negligent and liable for the mean dogs actions.  That is somewhat what I have to deal with, after knowing, and denying the fact that there are ex-husbands, much like O.J. Simpson, who would rather see their wife dead, than have another man with her.  Regardless of whether I agree with what Frank aka Allan, 4th husband from hell, not to mention Brett, and his revenge with Kay, and the girls club, he throws in my face, trying to make me feel bad, by stealing everything that would have been his, had I not left him!  James may even know these guys, if he is who I think he is, could be best friends, associates, buddies, and could have started out with their intents on his mind, but, like both of them, he liked me too . . . could have been eventually paid to leave me alone, or wanted to after he saw the cost, or just moved on . . . too hot to last!  Leaving him the second time, may have just kicked it into the trash can, or he could be a cop with tons of pressure to ditch the witch!  Understandable, but I had good intentions, with him in mind . . . price too high to pay, and under the cops scales, I, a brainiac, pale in comparison to the fake boobs headless Mooseman, LOL, or the alleged charm of Kay, the bald babe, who is worshiped for all my stuff, but they can't stand it when I did all they claimed she did, suffer from amnesia!

Sneaky Looks of Love!  Baseball Cap Miracles!

I did, however, while not getting to sit by James, with surveillance all over, get to sit across the mess hall from him, while I would catch him looking at me, trying not to get caught . . . I would wear a hat, down low over my eyes, and watch him without being detected by him!  I am more sneaky than he is . . . men are like dogs, women like cats.  Cats don't listen to people!  LOL!  I always enjoyed looking at him and catching him, giving me a glance, when he didn't think I was looking, but I always was, pretending not to care!  Spending my time with other people or gone, but thinking of him!  Whatever, days gone by, spilt milk!  Maybe we will get a second chance after the Patriot Act, sunsets!  May be the cops will realize I beat them and let me be with whomever I want to be! 

Check FBI Files . . . All Detectives or Most, Fat . . . Goes with Sitting on Your Ass 24/7 Solving Crimes!

I am fucking 60 years old, compare me to U.S. Attorney  General, Loretta Lynch, careers that fit bodies, very attractive, but put time into brain growth, rather than working out all the time.  Compare the physical level of a P.E. major, compared to an English major . . . compare a flight attendant on her feet all the time serving, those valuable peanuts and Coke to the physical level of an attorney, sitting on their ass, talking to clients, doing research, writing briefs, sitting in court, and driving to court!  Fast food, super size me, but get me to court in time!  Careers that fit . . . all the detectives, with few exceptions, who have been doing cop work and earned that position, sitting around, thinking, rather than being in the field, or giving tickets, like when they were young and beat cops, all are fat!  Careers that fit!  Double standards not welcome!

I have memberships to four gyms, and every time I start to get in shape, they start fucking with me . . . the exercise is not problem, the chasing me out of the city when I start looking like I used to is!  The evidence is on my purse, I have several of the plastic passes still hooked to my purse . . . I slim fast, and they know it, at the Summit, they were on my ass in less than three days, Rachel can't pull of being me, when I am thin, so they have a vested interest in keeping me unrecognizable, there is method to their madness!  Plus, the broken hearts club band, will be more angry at me for leaving them, than they already are!  It is like, just grow up, and leave me the hell alone!  Like I told Allan aka Frank, who told me he had slept with over 800 women and he had never been treated like he had been from me . . . yeah, and you were with bar flies and mall rats, amp it up, buddy, you are with a fucking attorney, and not the average attorney either!  Bit difference, so your little nameless, faceless dreams, might want to put faces on, because just because all women have tits and ass, they are not all of equal value, as far as merit and they are fucking not inter-changeable!

Every Relationship, But Your First, Unless Daddy and Mommy Fucked With Your Brain, Has Psychological Baggage!

I have to remind me, that this is the case with James too, with abandonment issues, with wife issues, previous relationships, but I have been married to the last three men, who were totally out to destroy me, take everything I had, loved, cherished as a means of punishment for their hearts, that I probably didn't care for like I should have . . . we are all the sum total of our relationships to this point and the person has to take all of us!  Wounded warriors in this game of love, are battle weary, cut, bruised, injured, both physically and emotionally, so patience and love, should dictate; however, both parties have to be totally honest and have full and fair disclosure, but me and James never got to get that far, may never get their again.  But, I wish things were different, but I need someone in my court, not against me, it is hard, with me against all the power, guns, surveillance, numbers . . . I am out numbered, by thousands, and am expected to compete, being run ragged, while those taking my place, got a sweet ride on my name, blah, blah, blah . . . it is hard to compete with my best self, working with my battered self, beat up by the statewide battering systems, doing all in their power to take me, not only down, but out!  That is permanently!  So, things are what they are . . . I am committed to teach where I can, correct misconceptions, explain what happened, at least to clear the air.

Now, I Am Going to Durango, Rafting!  Yahoo!