UNCONSCIOUS BIAS. SPIN CITY. RAMS HORNS. MONTANA 'TIL I DIE . . . PRETTY AS A POSY. JOIN THE ICE RAGE. COWBOY TRAIL. BOTA BOX. SWEET TEA SEPTIC & SEWER. NUSSBAUM. PAMIN. TABLE TALK OF MONATANA--RIVER CITY GRILL, BONNER, MONTANA TO FUZZY BUTTZ, WHITEFISH, MONTANA . . . WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM THE MISSOULA COUNTY SHERIFFS! LOL! STING OP IN PROGRESS--I CAN ALWAYS TELL WHEN THE HEAT IS CIRCLING THE WAGONS! TIME TO HIT THE ROAD! GOOD FUN! BUDDY RICK, GIVING ME A "GENUINE MONTANA EXPERIENCE!" BEST HOTEL IN THE WORLD, WAKING UP TO PINES TOWERING ABOVE YOU, THE LANDSCAPING OF GOD, WITH DEER AND DAISIES, MIXED IN THE QUAKING ASPEN, FOREST FOLIAGE AND FAUNA, SPLENDOR BEYOND DESCRIPTION! LAST NIGHT, WE WENT UP TO STILL WATER BAR & GRILL, ON STILL WATER LAKE, WITH THREE SISTER'S ISLAND, GREAT MUSIC, FUN PEOPLE, OFF THE CHARTS, BEAUTY, YUMMY FOOD, GREAT DECK TO WATCH THE WATERFALL OVER THE OLD LONGING LOGS, AND SUNSET . . . EXACTLY WHAT THE DOCTOR ORDERED, AND PRECISELY WHY I AM IN MONTANA! I JUST DROPPED INTO HEAVEN! I AM TURNING OVER A NEW LEAF, DROPPED DIET COKE, GETTING INTO THE HEALTHY, ACTIVE LIFE STYLE, OF WHITEFISH, STARTING WITH RICK, HAVING ME HAUL SHIT, FROM HIS TRUCK TO THE CAMP SITE, MAKING ME DO MORE THAN SIT AT THE NEAREST WI-FI SPOT WITH FATTENING FOOD, POUNDING FINGERS, THE MOST EXERCISE I HAVE HAD, IN A WHILE . . . NOW, I AM SITTING A SAFEWAY, DRINKING V8, YOPLAIT ORIGINAL YOGURT, AND SLAMMING WATER! THIN IN NO TIME, GOING OVER TO THE "WAVE" GYM, ADDING THE WEIGHTLIFTING AND WATER EXERCISES . . . 6 MONTHS BABY! I LOSE FAST, BECAUSE, I HAVE "NEVER" DIETED, MORE THAN A HALF DAY IN MY LIFE! LOL! EASY TO SEE THAT, BUT, I WAS A EXERCISE FIEND UNTIL THE GOVERNMENT GOT MY ASS, AS 46 YEARS OLD. I AVOID LOOKING IN THE MIRROR, AND REMEMBER THE THIN, GORGEOUS WOMAN THEY FUCKED! FEAR THIS . . . NEW BODY, LEAVING THE COPS ALONE FOR ONCE, GOOD ADVICE, SINCE I STARTED MY CAREER, IN MONTANA POLITICS, AT THE WHITEFISH LIBRARY, THINKING EVERYONE WAS PISSED ABOUT THE FBI RAIDS ON THE MEDICAL MARIJUANA GROWERS, WHO WERE ALMOST ALL AT THE MEETING, AND SHOWING OF THE "CODE OF THE WEST" ON THE BATTLE FOR CHANGE, OF THE 2004, LAW ALLOWING MEDICAL MARIJUANA, GOING TO A BULL SHIT LAW, PROPOSED FROM THE FBI AND THE DEPARTMENT OF EITHER HOMELAND SECURITY OR JUSTICE, IT HAS BEEN FOUR YEARS, END OF OCTOBER, AND SINCE THE DAY, NONE STOP HEAT ON ME, FROM ELECTION TO ELECTION! NEW ERA! I HAD FORGOTTEN, WHO BEAUTIFUL THE FLATHEAD VALLEY WAS, AND WHO FUN, FASHIONABLE, AND FABULOUS, WHITEFISH, IS, AND THE SHIT LOAD OF TOURISTS, SEE THE SAME THING, CAN'T DRIVE DOWN THE STREETS. RICK SAYS THEY JUST DRIVE AROUND AND AROUND . . . I SAID, BECAUSE IT IS SO BEAUTIFUL! ABSOLUTELY LOVELY! I GATHER THIS IS "TRUMP" COUNTRY, FROM RICK'S REMARKS, SO ANY DISCUSSION OF POLITICS AND RELIGION ARE OUR, OR, I AM KICKED OUT OF MY TENT, AND HAVE TO ROUGH IT ON MY OWN! LOL! THIS IS PROBABLY THE FIRST TIME, I AM A BIT TAMED, IN THE EXERCISE OF MY FREE SPEECH, AND FIRST AMENDMENT RIGHTS, IT IS A MATTER OF SURVIVAL! RICK IS A BACKWOODS, VERMONT BOY, HAD ME GO SHOOT A RUGAR, NEW REVOLUTION, LAST NIGHT, SCARED THE SHIT OUT OF ME, AND I AM SURE, IF I EVER NEEDED TO USE IN, ON BEAR, MOUNTAIN LION, OR MAN, THEY WOULD BE ENTIRELY SAFE! YESTERDAY, I BROKE, THE HANDLE OFF RICK'S PASSENGER SIDE DOOR, WHOOPS, OLD TRUCK, SO NOW, I AM TRAPPED, AND RICK EITHER HAS TO BE A GENTLEMAN AND LET ME OUT, OR I AM STUCK, UNTIL MY FINGERS, CAN DO MORE THAN TYPE, AND OPEN THE ALREADY HARD TO OPEN DOOR. RICK SAID, WHEN HE HAD TO OPEN THE DOOR, AND GIVE ME A HAND, TO GET INTO HIS TRUCK, THAT THIS DOESN'T MEAN, WE ARE ENGAGED OR ANYTHING. SO WHILE IN SEPARATE COMPARTMENTS OF THE SAME TENT, LAST NIGHT, I FELT, RICK'S KNEE IN MY BACK. NO BIG DEAL, NO RAPE HERE. THEN WHEN I WOKE UP, HE LEFT ME AT THE CAMPSITE! WHEN HE GOT BACK FROM GETTING HIS COFFEE, SINCE I DON'T DRINK IT, I SAID, LEAVING ME ALONE ON THE HONEYMOON? LOL! HE SAID, NOW, HOW LONG HAS IT BEEN, SINCE YOU SLEPT, IN THE SAME AREA WITH A MAN, YOU DIDN'T HAVE SEX WITH? I AM NOT EASY, SO IT HAS BEEN A LONG TIME. BUT YOU DID PUT YOUR KNEE IN MY BACK! HE SAID, WAS IT AS GOOD FOR YOU AS IT WAS FOR ME? THAT DEPENDS ON HOW GOOD IT WAS FOR YOU! LOL! WE SAT IN HIS TRUCK AND LISTENED TO THE LOCAL RADIO SHOW, WITH THE 80 SOMETHING YEAR OLD, LOCAL DUDE, WHO TELLS FUNNY TIDBITS ON HIS TAKE ON THE NEWS, WHAT HAPPENED IN HISTORY, ON THIS DAY, AND HE HAD A FUNNY SEGMENT ON, GOING TO A NUDIST BEACH IN FRANCE, I BELIEVE, WHERE HE AND A FRIEND, SAW THREE WOMEN, GOING OVER TO A ROCK, TOOK OFF ALL THEIR CLOTHES. HE TOLD HIS FRIEND, TO MOVE HIS HEAD SLIGHTLY FROM WHERE THEY WERE HIDING, SO HIS FRIEND DID, BUT WHEN HE GOT HIS FILM DEVELOPED, ALL HE HAD WAS A PICTURE OF THE BOTTOM OF THE THREE WOMEN'S FEET! LOL! PROBABLY, BETTER FOR MARITAL RELATIONS! ANYWAY, FUN TALK OF OUR EXPERIENCES OF NUDE THIS OR THAT! I THINK, BASICALLY, MOST PEOPLE, DON'T LOOK THAT HOT NUDE! BUT, I AM A VERY MODEST PERSON! LOL! ANYWAY, PROVIDENCE, NATURE, OR THE UNIVERSE, HOOKS PEOPLE UP TOGETHER, WHO HAVE SOMETHING TO OFFER, TO EACH OTHER, FOR A TIME, BUT, I MET RICK, WHEN I WAS GOING TO RENT FROM A GUY NAMED DAVE, LAST JANUARY, AND DAVE, VOLUNTEERED TO PICK ME UP, FROM THE SHUTTLE STOP, IN EVERGREEN, AND TAKE ME TO DAVE'S HOUSE, WHERE HE HAD A ROOM TO RENT . . . RICK USED TO BE A "SELECTMAN" OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT, IN VERMONT, LIKE A COUNTY COMMISSIONER OR CITY COUNCIL PERSON, SO HE IS UP ON POLITICS, ALWAYS FUN FOR ME, BUT, AS HE BROUGHT ME UP TO WHITEFISH, HE MADE ME A BETTER OFFER IN HIS HOUSE, GIVING ME A CHEAP ROOM! NOW, THIS JUST DAWNED ON ME, YESTERDAY, BUT, RICK HAD TWO OTHER ROOMMATES, AND THE NIGHT BEFORE HE MET ME, HE MET SOME HOT, THIRTY SOMETHING, AND THEY HAD RIOTOUS AND RAUCOUS SEX, IN THE UPPER BEDROOM, THAT IS LOCATED, RATHER CLOSE TO THE OTHER ROOMS, IN THIS OLD HOUSE, OVERLOOKING WHITEFISH LAKE, KILLER VIEW . . . BUT, A DAY OR TWO AFTER I WAS THERE, THERE WAS A FAMILY HOUSE COUNCIL MEETING AND THESE GUYS BOTH ASKED, IF I HAD "DUTY SEX" WITH ROOMMATES? NO! THE NEXT DAY, THEY GAVE RICK MARCHING ORDERS, THAT, I COULD NOT RENT THERE! RUDE! HAD I KNOWN, THAT WAS PART OF THE DEAL, I SURE AS SHIT WOULD NOT HAVE EVEN CONSIDERED, IT! SO YESTERDAY, THAT DAWNED ON ME, THAT, THE CHICK, FROM THE NIGHT BEFORE, WAS PROBABLY THE WILD ASS, CRAZY SEXED, MONTANA CHICK, BECAUSE, NOW IT ALL MADE SENSE, RICH TOLD ME THE GUYS THOUGHT I WAS HAVING SEX WITH HIM, AND THEY WERE JEALOUS . . . AND SINCE HE WAS GIVING ME A CHEAP DEAL ON RENT, SEX, NEEDED TO INCLUDE ALL OF THEM! SO, I FINALLY GET IT, 6 MONTHS LATER! BUT, IT WAS TOO COLD IN JANUARY, AND IT IS DELIGHTFUL NOW, SO ALL WORKED OUT FOR THE BEST! VERY INTERESTING TO CONNECT THE DOTS! I AM NOT EASY, AND ANY GUY, INCLUDING JAMES KENNEDY, WILL VOUCH FOR THAT ONE! CRAZY WHEN I LOOK BACK ON THINGS, EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE, BUT, I AM ME! THAT IS ALL I CAN BE . . . NOT A SPORT FUCK! BY ANY MEANS! CASE IN POINT, TWO CUTE, TWENTY-SOMETHINGS, WERE OUT, PLAYING THE GUITAR, OR SOMETHING LAST NIGHT, AS WE HEADED TO THE "REMINGTON BAR" FOR WHAT WE THOUGHT WAS A NIGHT OF KARAOKE, BUT, THESE TWO DARK HAIRED BEAUTIES, SAID THE TWO GUYS THERE WERE WITH, RICK SAID, PROBABLY, WHAT DID HE CALL THEM, RAIL TRAMPS, BUT YOUNG AND HOT LIKE THEM, DITCHED THEM. I COULD TELL THEY WERE HURT AND LEFT, TO FEND FOR THEMSELVES. WITH GUYS, WHO ARE WHAT I CALL ROLLING STONES, ARE JUST LOOKING AT YOU FOR A QUICK FIX, AND SEE YOU AS JUST EXTRA BAGGAGE ON THEIR TRAMP AROUND MONTANA, OR ANYWHERE IN THE U.S.A., DON'T BE USED AND ABUSED . . . LIKE MY SECOND OF FOUR HUSBANDS, SAID, MEN, FOR THE MOST PART, ARE JUST "DOGS IN HEAT!" LOL! IN OTHER WORDS, DON'T BE FLATTERED, THEY WILL HAVE SEX WITH ANY DOG! LOL! GET STREET SMART, IF YOU ARE GOING TO PLAY THIS GAME! BUT LEARN, AND MOVE ON! PLUG FOR "RIVER CITY GRILL" IN BONNER, MONTANA . . . VERY CHARMING ATMOSPHERE, CABIN FEEL TO IT, DEEP GREENS, RED AND PINE, FISH, HISTORIC PICTURES, OF WHEN THE BUILDING, BUILT IN 1914, ORIGINALLY, AS THE W.A. CLARK BUILDING, AT THE TURN OF THE CENTURY, AS HEADQUARTERS FOR THE WESTERN LUMBER COMPANY. THE OWNER OF 20 YEARS, GOAL IS TO CREATE AN AFFORDABLE, HISTORIC AND FAMILY FRIENDLY, DINING ESTABLISHMENT, AS WELL AS A GATHERING PLACE FOR THE ENTIRE COMMUNITY AND A DINING OASIS FOR TRAVELERS, TRUCKERS AND TOURISTS. I HAVE BEEN TO THE TRUCK STOP TONS OF TIMES AND HAVE NEVER NOTICED THE GRILL, SO, IT IS ON THE CLOSE SIDE, UPPER PART OF THE EITHER PILOT OR FLYING J, OR MAYBE TOWN PUMP, SHOWS YOU HOW, OBSERVANT I AM! BUT, IF YOU ARE GOING NORTH FROM YELLOWSTONE, TO GLACIER OR VISA VERSA, ALONG HIGHWAY, 93, STOP IN FOR A GOOD MEAL, AND A TOUCH OF HISTORY . . . THERE IS A FUN, ROADSIDE, MUSEUM, ACROSS THE STREET, THAT TELLS HOW THE FINNISH, SWEDES, FRENCH AND OTHERS, CAME TO MILLTOWN, TO SEE THEIR FORTUNES, IN THE TIMBER AND LUMBER RICH AREA, WHO GARDENED AND GREW THE COMMUNITIES, SET IN FUCKING AWESOME MOUNTAINSCAPE, SCENERY, WITH THE BLACKFOOT RIVER, RUNNING INTO THE CLARK FORK, AS I RECALL! THE RIVERS, STILL HAVE THE LOGS, THAT USED TO BE RUN DOWN THE RIVER, TO THE MILL, UNTIL, ENVIRONMENTALIST OR EPA, OR SOMEONE STOPPED THAT DEAL, BUT, A FUN SPOT TO VISIT AND LEARN THE HISTORY . . . LEWIS AND CLARK, MAKE SEVERAL STATEMENTS ABOUT COMING INTO THE PLACE, WORRIED ABOUT THE SHOSHONE INDIANS AND OTHER TRIBES, NEZ PEARSE, AND SALISH-KOOTENAI, SORRY, NOT FROM HERE ORIGINALLY, SO SLAUGHTERING SPELLING AND NAMES, HOPEFULLY, THESE ARE ALL LOCAL! I WAS WAITING FOR THE BUS, SO? FOLLOWED BY SHERIFFS, AND THE REST IS HISTORY! SOME FUN, DUMB UTAH LAWS, THAT ARE ON THE BACK OF THE TABLE TALK, BOOKLET, GOING BACK IN TIME, TO EATING, WITHOUT WI-FI . . . SMART MOVE! RETRO MEAL, READING THE FUN STUFF IN THESE TABLE PRODUCE!

DUMB LAWS IN UTAH

• It is illegal to detonate any nuclear weapon.  You can have them, but you just can't detonate them! 
• Birds have the right of way?
• It's legal for restaurants to serve wine with meals, but only if you ask for the wine list.
• It is against the law to fish from horseback.
• When a person reaches the age of 50, he/she can  marry their cousin.  Gives a whole new meaning to the term, kissin' cousins!
• You're not allowed to sell beverages containing more than 3.2% alcohol.  One of the Missoula bus drivers, frustrated by the liquor laws in Utah, after a trip to Moab, Utah, called Utah beer, water beer!  My daughter, Greta "Secrist" Hyland, wrote a great article for Utah Adventure Magazine, called Three Point Two, about the growing home breweries, in Utah, and the culture surrounding that.  She had to explain, to her tee-totter, mother, what, the term, 3.2 meant!  LOL!
• A husband is responsible for every criminal act committed by his wife while she is in his presence.

HAVE A GREAT DAY, WHEREVER YOU ARE, OR LAND! 

P.S., Oh, I went to the local, Soroptomist Thrift Store, to find a cheap ass sleeping bag, and low and behold, I found, a ball cap, the same color as my favorite, hat that was stolen, only, this one, appropriately, is a Griz hat, from the University of Montana . . . my color for smart, is orange--the perfect shade of orange, like my old Pov. Double Haul, fund raiser hat, indicating to me, that it was smart for me to leave, Missoula, when cops are following you, on the bus, and the bus driver, is stopping and making extended phone calls, and while I am changing where I want to go for breakfast, from the River City Grill, to Paul's Pancakes, to the Reno, in East Glacier, and seeing phone calls, on each stop, with two bike cops, hanging out across the street from the Poverello, where I did a pit stop for a shower, before heading out of town, and as I caught the bus to the Greyhound bus terminal, the bus driver, the same one, as was driving the Bonner bus in the morning, waved, overtly, to the fucking thin air, out the window of the bus, indicating to surveillance, so feds, that I was leaving town . . . after he asked me, or said, I thought you were leaving town?  I am, needed a shower, pit stop and then run to catch the shuttle, all in a hour and a half!

JOKE IS ON, MISSOULA COPS, NOT SAD TO BE IN WHITEFISH, AT ALL . . . I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO MOVE HERE FOR TWO YEARS, SO THANKS!