Monday, June 30, 2014

IS THERE A WILD ENOUGH LAW FIRM OUT THERE, ASKING A LOT, EVEN FOR MONTANA LAWYERS, TO ENTERTAIN THE IDEA OF HIRING SOMEONE, AS BAD ASS AS MYSELF? HERE IS A COPY OF THE LETTER OF INTEREST, AND MY RESUME--AT LEAST SOMEONE WILL GET IT, BESIDE THE FBI--I HAVE BEEN STOPPED, EVEN GETTING A JOB AT A FISHING VILLAGE IN WEST YELLOWSTONE, EVEN AFTER SIGNING AN EMPLOYMENT AGREEMENT, A MONTH IN THE MAKING . . . STAFF TOO INTIMIDATED, OR SO THE STORY GOES, THREE DAYS BEFORE LEAVING! LOL! NO NEED! I AM ALLEGEDLY DEAD; THEREFORE, YOU ARE ACTUALLY THINKING ABOUT ENTERTAINING A RESUME & TALES FROM THE CRYPT! GOVERNMENT! GOTTA LOVE'EM! LOL! YOU KNOW, THEY GOTTA LOVE ME! HA!

We Will See if A Bad Ass Con Law Chick, Member of the United States Supreme Court Bar, Can Even Get an Interview!

Every since the day, I was admitted, or really, at the time my first brief was due for the United States Supreme Court, I have been targeted, harassed, chased, battered, beaten, intimidated, blown up, robbed, with attempted character assassination, from the Utah State Bar Association, who took bribes, I would venture a guess, that I was one of the attorneys, in the whole state of Utah, actually doing the things attorneys are suppose to do . . . preserving, protecting and defending the Constitution, vigorously defending my clients rights and their cases, and doing a shit load of pro bono!  I just never bothered to record the hours, they were about 900 behind the top attorneys in the state--as per awards at bar conferences!

So, while I am going back to get sworn in as a member of the High Court bar, the only court of original jurisdiction, under the U.S. Constitution, that is not recognized either in the state of Utah, or by the Utah State Bar Association, armed with not one Certificate of Good Standing, but fucking 3 or 4, since, the 3rd one was magically lost, and a fourth had to be acquired, the bribed, bought, and paid for Utah Bar, was entertaining a bar complaint from attorneys, who joke about ripping their clients off, of $5,000, while I am standing in for them in court, due to their absence, and my continued presence on the court dockets, as the clients attorney, with other court connections or previous representation, usually under paid and under appreciated, while the attorney, that just banked the money, is a no show, even on their first appearance . . . does anyone dare call it conspiracy?


JOANN S. SECRIST, J.D.

Member of the United States Supreme Court Bar

Constitutional Law Attorney

406.407.3302

Watson Law Office, P.C.
424 E. Main Street, Suite 203A
Bozeman, MT  59715

June 26, 2014

RE: A Full Time Paralegal/Legal Assistant

I am sure that you are curious, as to why, an attorney with my experience, and work history, would consider a position as a paralegal/legal assistant . . . perhaps, the best way to describe it, is the fact that I used to be an Ivy Tower Attorney, working on legislation, writing grants, newsletters and manuals, training, among a large variety of things, prior to becoming a trial lawyer, with both civil and criminal experience, from small claims to the United States Supreme Court; however, I failed to actually be trained in the business side of the law, great lawyer, terrible business woman.

State & Federal Court Experience

In addition to that, I just jumped in a took on the world, with very little knowledge, bumbling through 228 pages of Federal Rules of Civil Procedure, at the same time I was dealing with 521 pages of evidence, betting a grasp of the facts, and writing the briefs, first in the case, Brock et al, v. Herbert et al, a $357 million securities case, against the Utah Governor, Attorney General, Director of the Department of Commerce, the Division of Securities, and going after 9 attorneys, and investigators, acting under color of law, while violating my clients, Brock and Rice, both financial planners, very successful, at that, being the first case I ever filed, in the United States Federal District Court of the District of Utah . . . with no one to train, teach, mentor, and just me alone, big mistake, doing a huge, widely followed, high profile case like that.

I guess you could say, that after hitting the United States Supreme Court level of law, it was like someone took a pin, and popped my balloon, or like climbing Mount Everest, and saying, now what?

Many Enemies, to Say the Least

Due to the nature of my clientele, and the caliber of defendants, the government, from local and state, cops, prosecutors, and judges, even, to federal agents, attorneys, and investigators, reaching entities, like Homeland Security, Department of Justice, Immigration and Customs Enforcement, or ICE, the states of Utah and Nevada, Utah National Guard, Las Vegas Review Journal, taking on the law firm of Williams and Colby, attorneys for Donald Trump, CNN and Fox News . . . just to name a few, with a high risk area of the law, that left me vulnerable, not quite defenseless, but lucky to be alive.

The last two years, have left me footloose and fancy free, except for worrying about my life on a daily basis, although, I have been writing a blog, entitled, bad ass con law chick blog or the governments version, bad ass con law chick blog, with about 5 other redirected Google accounts, that collect the hits, which have been as high as 155,000,000 before the blog was split, and as of last week, 67,000,000, which has been the most satisfying and far reaching in both impact, audience, and an agent for good, promoting constitutional law, and legal principles, as a means to educate the lay citizenry.  It has been a war, to say the least, with Google wanting hits, me refusing advertisement and pay, and the government trying to shut me down, censoring, or deleting what I am writing, when the blog is adverse to the Patriot Act, or other activities by law enforcement, prosecutors, judges, legislators, and whomever, up to and including the President.

High Risk Past--Behind the Scenes, Might Be the Right Place

I am controversial, at best, both hated and loved by both sides of the political aisle, feared by some, envied by others, and a victim of professional jealousy, target, and political and religious foe to the state of Utah, including the Utah State Bar Association, involved in a government sanctioned, character assassination or witch hunt, if you will.  So, after messing around for the last two and a half years, starting the day I was sworn into the United States Supreme Court Bar, in D.C., on January 23, 2012, my life has been less that settled.

As you can see, I know how to write, research, do legal briefs, file, and what not, so, my preferred choice right now, is to be behind the scenes, and help build your law firm, using my experience, expertise, skills, and knowledge, to be the secret weapon, when needed.  I hadn’t thought much about really doing anything with the law, right now, other than to possibly, do some risk management, consulting or public speaking . . . but, when I saw this ad, it caught my attention.

Own Boss for 14 Years, But Willing

Again, given the nature of my history, I have little but the clothes on my back, and a backpack, with make-up.  I had most everything, unlawfully taken from me, so, looking great, is not going to be much of an option, both until I get paid, or reach my real goal, to take some weight off.  Lest you think, I might think, myself above that position, today, I applied for a housekeeping person at a hotel.  I would like as much freedom, to work, write, research, and do what is needed.  But, whatever the job calls for, I am sure, I can buck up and get in the swing of things, both to regimentation and schedule.

When I first came to Montana, I spoke to the Montana State Bar Association, as to what I would need to do, to get license, they told me, given my experience, I could just write a letter to the Montana Supreme Court, and request permission to practice, or take the bar again, which I have not interest in doing.  I guess, if there was an emergency, I could go under the third year student provision, or paralegal, if that is available in Montana.  I really don’t want to go to court, but have absolutely no fear, after speaking to groups of 1300, and hundreds of people a week, at first I was offended that there was so little crowd, in a courtroom.

I realize, that this may be different than your normal paralegal, but I am not in it to make money, but to  make a difference.  You may want to read my political blog today, dealing with the ruling that just came out on immigration, and the unconstitutionality of some sections of the voters, referendum or ballot initiative . . . some comments, on 4th amendment, and other issues, regarding immigration, criminal law, and whatever.  I generally, just write, rarely if ever proofread, spell check, and let is loose to the universe, usually writing almost everyday.  I have written over 215 blogs, since September 25, 2013, so giving it up at this point is no big deal, if that is something the firm would like, or a condition for hiring.

Please consider, my sincere application and resume, and contact me if you feel, something could work out.

Thank You,



JoAnn S. Secrist, J.D.


RESUME OF JOANN S. SECRIST, J.D.

Constitutional Law Attorney

406.407.3302


PROFESSIONAL LICENSES:  Former Utah State Bar Association, U.S. Federal District Court of the District of Utah Bar, and current 10th Circuit Court of Appeals, and United States Supreme Court Bar, Utah Secondary Teaching Certificate

EDUCATION:  B.S., English/Communications/Teaching, Weber State University, 1986; Juris Doctorate, J. Reuben Clark Law School, Brigham Young University

EMPLOYMENT & EXPERIENCE:  Former staff attorney, Utah Prosecution Council, Criminal Enforcement Division, Utah Attorney General’s Office; assistant attorney general, administration, Utah Attorney General’s Office, over three statewide programs: constituent service, victim assistance and community programs, 13 staff and 1800 volunteers; assistant attorney general, Driver License and Health Divisions, Utah Attorney General’s Office; staff attorney, Utah Division of Aging, state of Utah; general counsel, Utah Medical Association; Louisell Intern, Americans United for Life, Chicago, Illinois; high school teacher, graphic artist, state of Utah; teaching, substitute teaching, landscaping, housekeeping,  and waitressing (high school & college employment)

UNIVERSITY ADJUNCT & PROFESSOR EMPLOYMENT & EXPERIENCE:  adjunct professor of argumentation and research, English Department, Utah Valley University (4 yrs); professor of family law, Family Studies Department, Brigham Young University; and family law professor, Family & Consumer Studies Department, University of Utah (7 yrs combined); director of satellite tutoring in the dorms, Weber State University

TEACHING & LEGAL WRITING EXPERIENCE:  two years legal writing instructor for small sections torts, research assistant: tort, water law, weather modification, family law and constitutional law.  Published 8 articles on GoArticles, and Bad Ass Con Law Chick Blog, 155 million hit on Google

PROFESSIONAL PUBLICATIONS:  DOMESTIC VIOLENCE 101: A User Friendly Manual for Prosecutors & Law Enforcement on Domestic Violence & Sexual Assault, award for national model, under the Violence Against Women Act, given in Washington, D.C., by President Clinton, graphic being used and adapted for Human Body Trafficking, by Department of Justice and states attorney generals; POWERS & DUTIES OF COUNTY ATTORNEYS, a training manual for newly elected and current county attorneys in Utah; A HOLISTIC APPROACH TO DOMESTIC VIOLENCE FOR HEALTH CARE PROVIDERS, published in the University of Utah Medical School, Annual Review; 8 articles published on GoArticles, various political comments

PERSONAL INTERESTS & FAMILY:  politics, writing, public speaking, hiking, camping, golfing.  Widow, I Corp. Marine; 4 children: oldest daughter, Intelligence, U.S. Navy, Navy Hall of Fame, master degree, natural resource management, married, Navy SEAL, 3 children; second daughter, Air Force, military linguist, Spanish, #1 in class, almost master degree, International Relations, married, Army, linguist in Arabic, 2 children; oldest son, manager for national computer company, cover 300 magazines, newspapers, and professional journals, create files for movie stars, politicians and companies, wife too, 1 child; and youngest son, student at U of U, rock star, 3 CD deal with Sony, subsidiary, Translation Lost, accepted Berklee School of Music, Boston, waiter, Blue Plate, SLC, Utah.

P.S., Some good exposure . . . I do understand when I can and cannot swear! LOL!

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